Clint Eastwood

Holy smokes Batman! Another retro movie weekend is here and boy are we excited!

Kicking down the door of our local Blockbusters (metaphorically), we find ourselves faced with a entire plethora of awesome retro movies just waiting to be released and enjoyed. Walking the isles, we gaze across the start-studded covers with all their promise or action, romance and of course some cracking one liners. After carefully selecting our weekend fill, we’ll slam our membership card on the desk before smoothly walking away in what felt like slow motion and through the fog. We will be back…

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 20th May

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The Parent Trap (1998) 5STAR 1:30pm-4:05pm
Identical twin sisters who are unaware of each other’s existence meet by accident. They decide to join forces in a bid to reunite their estranged parents, and switch places to get the warring couple to kiss and make up. Remake of the 1961 Disney comedy, starring Dennis Quaid, Natasha Richardson, Elaine Hendrix and Lindsay Lohan in a dual role.

Last Action Hero (1993) Sony channel 6:20pm-9:00pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A boy watching an action movie is transported into the film by a magic ticket and meets its hero figure, who refuses to believe he is a fictional character. Matters take a turn for the worse when the screen villain gets hold of the ticket and crosses over into the real world – where bad guys can win. Comedy adventure, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Austin O’Brien, Charles Dance, F Murray Abraham and Anthony Quinn.

Navy Seals (1990) ITV4 9:00pm-11:20pm
The US Navy’s elite commando force embarks on a dangerous covert mission to rescue hostages from an Arab terrorist in Beirut. However, the assignment proves far more serious than expected when they realise their enemies have acquired powerful stolen missiles. Action adventure, starring Charlie Sheen, Michael Biehn, Joanne Whalley, Bill Paxton and Rick Rossovich.

Total Recall (1990) ITV 9:50pm-12:20am
A construction worker pays to have fake memories of a dream holiday implanted into his brain, but discovers his mind has already been tampered with – apparently to erase his true identity as a secret agent from a colony on Mars. He journeys to the planet in search of the truth, but is drawn into a conflict between the tyrannical ruler and a rebel faction. Paul Verhoeven’s sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rachel Ticotin and Michael Ironside.

The Outlaw Josey Wales (1976) Dave 10:00pm-12:40am (2 hours 40 minutes)
A Confederate soldier refuses to surrender at the end of the Civil War, and is branded a dangerous outlaw. Crossing America in search of sanctuary from the army and bounty hunters, he only wants solitude – but ends up with a strange assortment of travelling companions. Western, directed by and starring Clint Eastwood. With Chief Dan George and Sondra Locke

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) ITV4 4 11:20pm-1:15am
A crook and his unhinged brother take a preacher’s family hostage and cross the border into Mexico. They head to a rough strip club to make a planned rendezvous with a third party – but they soon have to live on their wits when they realise that the establishment’s staff are vampires. Horror, starring George Clooney, Harvey Keitel, Quentin Tarantino, Juliette Lewis and Salma Hayek.

SUNDAY 21st May

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Hook (1991) Sony Movie Channel 11:30am-2:35pm (3 hours 5 minutes)
Peter Pan, who has finally grown up and is now a married lawyer with a family of his own, is whisked away by Tinkerbell to Neverland, where he must learn to fly again if he is to save his children from the clutches of Captain Hook. Steven Spielberg’s fantasy adventure, with Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman, Julia Roberts, Bob Hoskins and Maggie Smith.

Willow (1988) Channel 5 2:45pm-5:10pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A farmer with dreams of becoming a wizard finds an abandoned baby, who is destined to bring about the downfall of an evil queen. The wicked tyrant’s minions have been sent to kill the child before she can fulfil the prophecy, and it falls to the would-be sorcerer to protect her, with the aid of a rogue warrior. Fantasy adventure, starring Warwick Davis and Val Kilmer.

Time Bandits (1981) Film4 2:50pm-5:05pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A bemused schoolboy is escorted on a bizarre journey through time by a group of larcenous dwarfs. His adventures lead him to encounters with various characters from history – but none of them are quite what he had imagined. Terry Gilliam’s fantasy comedy, starring Craig Warnock, David Rappaport, John Cleese, Michael Palin, Sean Connery, Ian Holm, Ralph Richardson and David Warner.

Robin Hood (1973) Chennel 4 3:50pm-5:30pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
The adventures of the legendary outlaw and Sherwood Forest’s band of heroes as they rob the rich to feed the poor, while evil Prince John hatches a cunning plan to exact revenge and finish off the brigands. Disney animation, with the voices of Terry-Thomas, Peter Ustinov, Phil Harris, Brian Bedford and Monica Evans.

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) ITV 4:20pm-6:40pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
James Bond’s investigation into the death of a world-renowned scientist working on solar technology draws him into a battle of wits with a stealthy assassin, who dispatches his victims with a golden bullet and has the British secret agent next in his sights. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Christopher Lee, Britt Ekland and Maud Adams.

James Bond TShirts

Labyrinth (1986) Channel 5 5:10pm-7:05pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A teenager wishes her baby brother would be taken away, only to have her request granted by a band of goblins and their sinister king. She regrets her decision and sets out to rescue him, but to reach the castle where he is being held, she must find her way through a magical maze full of strange creatures. Jim Henson’s fantasy adventure, starring Jennifer Connelly and David Bowie.

Labyrinth Merchandise

The Cable Guy (1996) Sony Movie Channel 7:05pm-9:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A man makes the mistake of engaging a cable TV installer in conversation in a ploy to get all the channels for free. However, the manic repairman shows an invincible determination to be his new best friend – and does not take kindly to rejection. Comedy directed by Ben Stiller, starring Jim Carrey, Matthew Broderick and George Segal.

The Terminator (1984) Spike 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
A cyborg assassin is sent on a murderous mission back in time to the 20th century, where he wreaks havoc while searching for his intended victim – a woman whose unborn son is destined to lead the human race in a war against machines. However, a soldier has also been sent from the future to protect her. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton and Michael Biehn.

Highlander (1986) Channel 5 11:55pm-2:00am (2 hours 5 minutes)
A 16th-century Scottish clansman discovers he is one of a race of immortal warriors who can only be killed by beheading, and who are destined to fight to the death until just one survives. Centuries later in modern-day New York, he prepares for a final showdown with his deadliest enemy. Fantasy action adventure, starring Christopher Lambert, Sean Connery, Clancy Brown and Roxanne Hart.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, stay cool, stay humble and stay out all night!



Take to the skies! Another retro movie weekend is among us!

With a zip and a clip, we’ve packed our bags for another long and adventure filled journey through the retro movie jungle that be before us. Taking just the bare essentials with us… which is still more than you expect, we’ll begin our tour through far and distant lands. Stopping for only refreshments, we will masterfully hack our way through the cinematic wonder as we reach our final destination, only to gaze and stare at the majestic celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 11th FEBRUARY

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The Wizard of Oz
(1939) 5STAR 12:55pm-3:00pm
Youngster Dorothy Gale is whisked over the rainbow by a tornado into the magical land of Oz, where she inadvertently kills a wicked witch – incurring the wrath of another. Setting out to find the wizard who can show her a way home, she is joined on her journey by a scarecrow, a tin man and a cowardly lion, who all hope their own wishes will be granted. Musical fantasy, with Judy Garland, Ray Bolger, Jack Haley, Bert Lahr and Frank Morgan.

The Wizard of Oz Merchandise

Turner & Hooch (1989) Film4 4:55pm-6:55pm (2 hours)
A Californian detective investigating the murder of a local man by drug smugglers has only one witness to help him solve the case – the large, smelly dog that belonged to the victim, which is about to turn the detective’s well-ordered existence into chaos. Family comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Mare Winningham and Craig T Nelso.

Every Which Way But Loose (1978) ITV4 4:00pm-6:10pm
A truck driver travels across America with his faithful orang-utan competing in bare-knuckle fights for extra cash. He becomes smitten with a country singer who subsequently vanishes without a trace, so man and ape set off in search of her – with an enraged gang of bikers in pursuit. Action comedy, starring Clint Eastwood, Sondra Locke, Geoffrey Lewis and Beverly D’Angelo.

Volcano (1997) Film4 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A river of molten lava spews from an erupting volcano onto the streets of Los Angeles, prompting the head of a crisis agency to team up with an intrepid scientist in a frantic and dangerous bid to save the city’s residents. Disaster thriller, starring Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, Gaby Hoffmann, Keith David and Don Cheadle.

The Full Monty (1997) Dave 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
Six unemployed men from Sheffield decide to become strippers for one night only in a bid to raise extra money. However, with no dancing experience and far from perfect physiques, the men rely on the unique selling point of complete nudity to impress the punters. Comedy, starring Robert Carlyle, Mark Addy, Tom Wilkinson, Hugo Speer and Paul Barber.

Mars Attacks! (1996) ITV4 11:15pm-1:25am
The inhabitants of Earth leap into action to repel an impending invasion by a seemingly invincible Martian army, which possesses superior weaponry, a thirst for destruction and a wicked sense of humour. Tim Burton’s sci-fi comedy, starring Jack Nicholson, Glenn Close, Pierce Brosnan, Annette Bening, Natalie Portman, Danny DeVito and Tom Jones.

The Blues Brothers (1980) Sony Movie Channel 11:20pm-2:10am (2 hours 50 minutes)
Two criminal brothers discover the orphanage where they were raised faces closure unless the nuns who run it can pay their tax bill, so the pair embark on an urgent mission to revive their old blues band to raise the money needed. Comedy, starring John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Aretha Franklin, James Brown, Ray Charles, Cab Calloway, Carrie Fisher, John Candy and John Lee Hooker.

SUNDAY 12th FEBRUARY

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Mrs Doubtfire
(1993) Channel 4 5:15pm-7:30pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A struggling actor’s ambitious, no-nonsense wife throws him out and demands a divorce. Desperate to spend time with his children, he puts his talents to good use by donning drag and posing as a Scottish housekeeper to get a job looking after them. Comedy, starring Robin Williams, Sally Field, Pierce Brosnan, Harvey Fierstein and Mara Wilson.

Catch Me If You Can (2002) BBC2 5:45pm-8:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
The story of Frank Abagnale Jr, who found notoriety as a teenager conning and charming his way across America. Posing as a pilot, a doctor and a lawyer, Frank was able to fund an extravagant lifestyle while outwitting the FBI at every turn. Fact-based drama, starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Tom Hanks, Christopher Walken, Martin Sheen and James Brolin.

Men in Black (1997) E4 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
A streetwise cop is enlisted by a top-secret government force dedicated to policing alien visitors to Earth, teaming up with a veteran agent just as a body-swapping extraterrestrial giant insect begins a reign of terror throughout New York City. Sci-fi comedy, starring Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Linda Fiorentino, Rip Torn and Vincent D’Onofrio.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, stay humble, stay hungry.

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Holy sweet potato! It’s really the weekend again? So soon? Well….

Hitting the roads like a speed demon, we’ll be donning the cycling shoes, cycling jersey and of course trusty helmet as we make our way through the mornings hustle and bustle. We’ll swiftly slip our way through the gears, peddling frantically and taking on the longest and steepest of hills, stopping only to capture our sights onto celluloid wonder. Reaching our destination with heavy breath, we find our reward of that fresh hot morning cuppa. Bliss!

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 23rd MAY

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Look Who’s Talking
(1989) GOLD 8:30am-10:25am (1 hour 55 minutes)
Pregnant Mollie is dumped by her boyfriend, and sets out after the baby’s birth to find a surrogate father for her infant son Mikey, who comments on proceedings through a wisecracking inner monologue. Mikey is confident the cab driver who helped deliver him is the perfect man for the job – but his mother is less than convinced. Comedy, with John Travolta, Kirstie Alley and the voice of Bruce Willis.

The Railway Children (2000) ITV3 11:55am-2:10pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Simon Nye’s feature-length dramatisation of E Nesbit’s heart-warming novel about three Edwardian children forced to leave their middle-class London home and move to rural Yorkshire, where they fall on hard times and embark on a series of exciting adventures. The all-star cast includes Jenny Agutter, who played Bobbie in Lionel Jeffries’ 1972 film version, Jemima Rooper, Gregor Fisher, Richard Attenborough, Jack Blumenau and Clare Thomas.

Sister Act (1992) Film4 1:00pm-3:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Nightclub singer Deloris Van Cartier agrees to testify against her gangster boyfriend after witnessing a murder. Placed in protective custody by the authorities, she is less than pleased to discover she is expected to pose as chaste nun Sister Mary Clarence in a convent. Comedy, starring Whoopi Goldberg, Harvey Keitel, Maggie Smith, Bill Nunn and Kathy Najimy.

Father of the Bride Part II (1995) BBC1 London 2:00pm-3:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A put-upon father has just got used to his daughter being married, when he learns she is pregnant. Thrown into a mid-life crisis, he impulsively sells his house so he and his wife can buy the seafront retreat they had always dreamed about – only for responsibility to come crashing back on him when his wife reveals she is also expecting. Comedy sequel, starring Steve Martin and Diane Keaton.

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (2001) ITV London 2:40pm-5:30pm (2 hours 50 minutes)
An orphaned boy endures a miserable childhood, until he discovers he has magical powers and enrols at a special school for young wizards. However, his suspicions are aroused by a sinister teacher who seems to be up to no good. Fantasy adventure, adapted from the first of JK Rowling’s books, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Robbie Coltrane, Alan Rickman and Richard Harris.

Matilda (1996) Comedy Central 6:00pm-8:00pm (2 hours)
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Apocalypse Now (1979) ITV4 9:00pm-12:05am (3 hours 5 minutes)
An army captain is sent on a top-secret mission into Cambodia, where his goal is to find and assassinate a renegade colonel who has gone insane and is worshipped by his followers as a god. However, as his patrol boat journeys further upriver, the conflict and disarray surrounding him becomes increasingly disturbing and nightmarish. Francis Ford Coppola’s Vietnam War drama, starring Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando and Robert Duvall.

Unforgiven (1992) 5USA 9:20pm-12:00am (2 hours 40 minutes)
Two notorious gunslingers come out of retirement to help a young assassin collect the $1,000 bounty on the heads of a pair of cowboys who attacked and mutilated a prostitute in the backwoods town of Big Whiskey. The local sheriff, however, has no intention of letting the pair impinge on his own authority. Oscar-winning Western, directed by and starring Clint Eastwood, with Gene Hackman, Morgan Freeman, Jaimz Woolvett and Richard Harris.

SUNDAY 24th MAY

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Look Who’s Talking Too
(1990) GOLD 8:50am-10:25am (1 hour 35 minutes)
Wisecracking toddler Mikey is joined by mischievous baby sister Julie and sibling rivalry inevitably erupts – while their parents have problems of their own to deal with, in the shape of the kids’ good-for-nothing uncle. Comedy sequel, starring John Travolta and Kirstie Alley, with the voices of Bruce Willis and Rosanne Barr.

Batteries Not Included (1987) ITV London 1:10pm-3:15pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A family of tiny alien spacecraft intervenes to help the residents of a run-down Manhattan brownstone tenement stop greedy developers from demolishing their homes. However, the miniature flying saucers have the odds stacked against them as they bravely do all they can to save the day. Sci-fi fantasy, starring Jessica Tandy, Hume Cronyn, Frank McRae and Elizabeth Pena.

Getting Even with Dad (1994) 5* 2:00pm-4:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Spoilt child Timmy goes to live with his outwardly respectable father, but realises he is a small-time thief planning his latest robbery. Timmy sets out to reform his dad, and in the meantime manages to fix him up with an attractive undercover cop – leading to much confusion. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Ted Danson, Glenne Headly and Hector Elizondo.

Fun Fact: The name of the roller coaster Timmy, Raymond, Robert, and Carl just got off is Speed Demon which was referring to Macaulay Culkin’s close friend Michael Jackson’s hit song.

Jurassic Park (1993) ITV2 3:10pm-5:40pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
Scientists are given a sneak preview of a safari park inhabited by genetically engineered dinosaurs created by an eccentric tycoon. However, it all goes wrong when a greedy employee sabotages the security systems, allowing the prehistoric beasts to roam free and hunt the visitors. Steven Spielberg’s action adventure, starring Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough and Samuel L Jackson.

Spirited Away (2002) Film4 5:00pm-7:25pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A petulant 10-year-old enters an abandoned amusement park while accompanying her parents on a family outing, and finds herself transported to a fantastical world controlled by two witches, where she must follow the rules if she is ever to return home. Oscar-winning Japanese animated fantasy directed by Hayao Miyazaki, with the voices of Daveigh Chase, Jason Marsden, Suzanne Pleshette and Susan Egan.

Spider-Man (2002) Comedy Central 6:30pm-9:00pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
A clumsy teenager develops superhuman powers after a genetically engineered spider bites him. At first his fantastic skills delight him, but his elation is severely tempered by a family tragedy, prompting him to dedicate his talents to combating evil. However, he faces a baptism of fire in the form of crazed villain the Green Goblin. Comic-book superhero adventure, with Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, Willem Dafoe, James Franco and Rosemary Harris.

Groundhog Day (1993) GOLD 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
An obnoxious TV weatherman reporting on a small town’s annual festival finds himself caught in a bizarre time loop, and is forced to relive the same day over and over again. While at first he tries to exploit his predicament, he is ultimately driven to mend his ways and adopt a less cynical attitude. Comedy, starring Bill Murray, Andie MacDowell, Chris Elliott and Stephen Tobolowsky.

The Dead Pool (1988) ITV4 10:00pm-11:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Uncompromising detective `Dirty’ Harry Callahan hunts the ringleaders behind a bizarre death lottery which is seemingly being used to murder well-known figures. The case becomes personal when he discovers his own name is on the list of prospective victims. Action thriller sequel, starring Clint Eastwood, Patricia Clarkson, Liam Neeson and an early appearance by Jim Carrey.

The Sixth Sense (1999) Film4 10:50pm-1:00am (2 hours 10 minutes)
A child psychologist, disheartened after the suicide of a former patient, takes on the case of a terrified boy haunted by ghostly apparitions, and tries to help him discover what the spirits want from him. M Night Shyamalan’s supernatural thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment, Toni Collette and Olivia Williams.

Fun Fact: This classic is one of only four horror films to receive an Oscar nomination for Best Picture; the other three were The Exorcist (1973), Jaws (1975), and The Silence of the Lambs (1991).

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, Don’t forget to change down a gear when stopping and bringing more food than you need never hurt anyone.

xoxo

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Due South of the forest! It’s really the weekend so soon?

You betcha! Like a proud and noble Canadian Mountie, we’ll be riding our trusty steed full speed into the weekend’s retro movie awesomeness! We’ll be Maintiens le droit (Defending the Law) at each step of the way as we ride through far and distant lands, helping those in need as we go before stopping to breath in the celluloid wonder of the vast and majestic landscape.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 28th February

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Dragnet
(1987) ITV4 12:45pm-2:50pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A by-the-book Los Angeles cop is paired with a laid back new partner to investigate the nefarious activities of a TV evangelist and a pornographic-magazine baron suspected of operating a criminal cult. Comedy spoof of the 1950s TV series, starring Dan Aykroyd, Tom Hanks, Christopher Plummer and the original show’s star Harry Morgan.

Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea (1961) 5USA 1:35pm-3:50pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An admiral takes charge of an experimental submarine just as the world is plunged into catastrophe. A belt of radiation surrounding the planet has ignited, threatening all life on Earth. The admiral believes he can end the crisis with a well-aimed nuclear missile, but faces an uphill struggle to convince high command that his plan will not lead to more destruction. Sci-fi adventure, with Walter Pidgeon, Joan Fontaine and Robert Sterling.

Jurassic Park (1993) ITV2 7:10pm-9:40pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
Scientists are given a sneak preview of a safari park inhabited by genetically engineered dinosaurs created by an eccentric tycoon. However, it all goes wrong when a greedy employee sabotages the security systems, allowing the prehistoric beasts to roam free and hunt the visitors. Steven Spielberg’s action adventure, starring Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough and Samuel L Jackson.

Jurassic Park T-Shirts

Batman Begins (2005) Sky1 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Billionaire Bruce Wayne travels the world seeking the means to fight injustice, consumed with rage over his parents’ murder. Trained by a secret society, he hones his fighting skills and returns to his home city of Gotham on a mission to rid it of crime and corruption in the guise of a masked vigilante. Comic-book adventure, exploring the origins of the Dark Knight, with Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Liam Neeson, Cillian Murphy, Gary Oldman and Katie Holmes.

Batman T-Shirts

Broken Arrow (1996) more>movies 9:00pm-11:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A US Air Force veteran ejects his co-pilot from their Stealth bomber in a plan to steal the plane’s cargo of nuclear warheads. He uses the weapons to extort money from the American government by threatening to detonate one in a major city. Action thriller, starring John Travolta, Christian Slater, Samantha Mathis and Delroy Lindo.

Fun Fact: John Travolta was given the choice of playing either Deakins or Hale in the film. He chose the villain Deakins.

The Island (1980) ITV4 11:50pm-2:10am (2 hours 20 minutes)
A band of modern-day pirates operating out of a Caribbean island preys on luxury yachts. A journalist and his son investigate why so many vessels go missing in the area, but end up kidnapped and forced to join the crew. Thriller, starring Michael Caine, David Warner, Frank Middlemass, Don Henderson, Dudley Sutton and Colin Jeavons.

SUNDAY 29th February

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Groundhog Day
(1993) GOLD 12:00pm-2:00pm (2 hours)
An obnoxious TV weatherman reporting on a small town’s annual festival finds himself caught in a bizarre time loop, and is forced to relive the same day over and over again. While at first he tries to exploit his predicament, he is ultimately driven to mend his ways and adopt a less cynical attitude. Comedy, starring Bill Murray, Andie MacDowell, Chris Elliott and Stephen Tobolowsky.

A View to a Kill (1985) ITV London 3:40pm-6:05pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
James Bond clashes with a megalomaniac international businessman plotting a global takeover of the computer industry by engineering a devastating earthquake in California’s Silicon Valley – and killing millions in the process. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore in his final appearance as 007 alongside Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Tanya Roberts and Patrick Macnee.

Fun Fact: Roger Moore celebrated his 57th birthday during filming, making him the oldest actor to play Bond. Sean Connery was 52 in Never Say Never Again (1983).

Transformers (2007) E4 7:00pm-10:00pm (3 hours)
Teenager Sam Witwicky is treated to his first car by his dad, but it turns out to be an alien scout with a life of its own. Before long, the vehicle embroils Sam in a long-running intergalactic war between two factions of giant shape-changing robots, which have come to Earth to find a mystical cube that grants infinite power to its possessor. Michael Bay’s sci-fi action adventure, inspired by the toy franchise, with Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Jon Voight and John Turturro.

Transformers T-Shirts

Terminal Velocity (1994) Film4 6:55pm-8:55pm (2 hours)
A skydiving instructor tries to clear himself of responsibility for the death of a woman whose parachute failed to open. However, he later learns she is a Russian spy who faked her own demise, and now needs his help to foil an international criminal conspiracy out to steal a fortune in bullion. Action thriller, starring Charlie Sheen, Nastassja Kinski and James Gandolfini.

Jurassic Park III (2001) ITV2 7:10pm-9:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Palaeontologist Dr Alan Grant is lured to a dinosaur-infested island by a divorced couple who offer to fund his research, unaware their real motive is to find their missing son – and that the creatures on the island are far more intelligent than anyone suspected. Action adventure sequel, starring Sam Neill, William H Macy, Tea Leoni and Alessandro Nivola.

Pale Rider (1985) ITV4 9:00pm-11:25pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
An unscrupulous landowner threatens to throw gold-miners off their land and take the riches for himself. As the law turns a blind eye to their troubles, the miners desperately need a saviour – who happens to arrive in the form of a mysterious preacher with formidable gunfighting skills. Western, directed by and starring Clint Eastwood, alongside Michael Moriarty, Carrie Snodgress and Richard Dysart.

Groundhog Day (1993) GOLD 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
An obnoxious TV weatherman reporting on a small town’s annual festival finds himself caught in a bizarre time loop, and is forced to relive the same day over and over again. While at first he tries to exploit his predicament, he is ultimately driven to mend his ways and adopt a less cynical attitude. Comedy, starring Bill Murray, Andie MacDowell, Chris Elliott and Stephen Tobolowsky. ;)

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to be kind, rewind and that a maybe is sometimes better than a no.

xoxo

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Cheese and crackers! Is it really the weekend. Let’s celebrate in style!

With all the finest of guests adorning some of the very classiest attire, we’ll schmooze our way around the cocktail party, chatting to some of the great and good of the local area.
Heading to the bar, we’ll check our pocket watch and adjust our tie before tipping the bar keep for his hard work and experience in creating our latest creation of only the finest spirits and mixers. We’ll sip our drink slowly before heading to the floor to capture even more of the nights greatness like a camera capturing a movies celluloid magic.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 6th DECEMBER

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The Hunt for Red October
(1990) 1:00pm Film4 165 minutes
A Soviet submarine commander creates an international crisis by piloting his experimental nuclear vessel, which is invisible to sonar, toward the American coast. The US and Russian navies think he is planning to attack and set out to destroy the submarine, but a CIA analyst suspects he intends to defect to the West. Cold War thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, starring Sean Connery, Alec Baldwin and James Earl Jones.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002) 3:00pm ITV 180 minutes
The young wizard and his friends return for their second term at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to discover a strange serpentine power is petrifying the other students. Meanwhile, Harry is haunted by a sinister voice in his head urging him to uncover the dark force that is stalking the corridors of the school. Fantasy adventure sequel, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson and Kenneth Branagh.

Harry Potter T-Shirts

Home Alone (1990) 6:10pm Sky Movies Comedy 110 minutes
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O’Hara and John Candy.

Home Alone T-Shirts

Rocky Balboa (2006) 6:30pm Channel 5 120 minutes
The ageing fighter contemplates a return to the ring when a computer simulation reveals he would have defeated the current world heavyweight champion Mason `The Line’ Dixon, who responds by challenging Rocky to face him for real. Boxing drama sequel, directed by and starring Sylvester Stallone. With Antonio Tarver, Geraldine Hughes, Burt Young, Milo Ventimiglia and Tony Burton.

Rocky T-Shirts

Pale Rider (1985) 10:30pm Channel 5 130 minutes
An unscrupulous landowner threatens to throw gold-miners off their land and take the riches for himself. As the law turns a blind eye to their troubles, the miners desperately need a saviour – who happens to arrive in the form of a mysterious preacher with formidable gunfighting skills. Western, directed by and starring Clint Eastwood, alongside Michael Moriarty, Carrie Snodgress and Richard Dysart.

SUNDAY 7th DECEMBER

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Titanic
(1997) 11:00am Sky Movies Modern Greats 195 minutes
A party of explorers studying the sunken remains of the famous liner meets an elderly woman who was a passenger on the ill-fated maiden voyage. She recounts how she boarded the ship while on the brink of being forced into marriage by her family, and was stopped from killing herself by a penniless artist. She fell in love with her saviour, but the disaster on the horizon meant their time together was doomed to be short. James Cameron’s Oscar-winning romantic drama, starring Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, Billy Zane, Kathy Bates and Bill Paxton.

Beetlejuice (1988) 2:05pm 5* 115 minutes
Recently deceased couple Adam and Barbara Maitland enlist the professional services of a hard-boiled veteran ghost to scare away the obnoxious yuppie family who have moved into their former home. Tim Burton’s supernatural comedy, starring Michael Keaton, Geena Davis, Alec Baldwin, Winona Ryder, Jeffrey Jones and Catherine O’Hara.

Fun Fact: Michael Keaton spent only two weeks filming his part in the film, which lasts 17.5 minutes out of the 92-minute running time.

Apollo 13 (1995) 4:00pm ITV 155 minutes
Fact-based drama about the ill-fated 1970 Apollo 13 mission to the moon. Crew leader Jim Lovell is faced with a nightmare when the mission suffers an on-board explosion – leaving the team stranded in space with a dwindling oxygen supply while flight controllers and engineers in Houston try to find a way to bring the crew safely back to Earth. With Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton, Ed Harris and Gary Sinise.

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992) 5:25pm Channel 4 140 minutes
Hapless youngster Kevin somehow manages to catch the wrong plane and finds himself heading for New York, while his family jets off to Florida. Having got his hands on his father’s credit card, he is enjoying the good life staying in a luxury hotel – until he bumps into two familiar burglars with an axe to grind. Comedy sequel, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, Brenda Fricker and Tim Curry.

Big (1988) 6:55pm Film4 125 minutes
A boy ridiculed for his size makes a wish on a fairground machine to become bigger – only to wake up as a 30-year-old man. Driven from his home by his terrified mother, the bewildered youngster trapped in a grown-up body makes his way to New York, where he rises high in the ranks of a toy manufacturing company and applies his youthful enthusiasm to the complexities of adult life. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins and Robert Loggia.

The Specialist (1994) 9:00pm ITV4 135 minutes
An explosives expert is reluctantly persuaded out of retirement by the charms of a vengeful woman bent on destroying the gang that murdered her parents. He carries out a series of assassinations, but finds himself caught in a deadly game of cat and mouse when one of his targets hires a former colleague to track him down. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Sharon Stone, James Woods, Rod Steiger and Eric Roberts.

Rambo III (1988) 11:15pm ITV4 125 minutes
Vietnam veteran John Rambo turns down a request from his old colonel to join a mission in Soviet-occupied Afghanistan. However, when the officer is captured, Rambo sets off to save him, joining the Mujahedeen rebels in fighting against the Russian invaders. Action adventure sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Kurtwood Smith, Marc de Jonge and Sasson Gabai.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, just remember, keep it classy.

xoxo

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Dante’s Inferno! the weekend starts now

So in the deepest darkest corner of a dimly lit rickety old wooden shack by the side of a book shelf full of dusty old paper backs with dog eared pages, let us be your  small yet slightly imposing house spider, as we spin for you a web of mega cinematic fortitude so we can catch fat,  juicy retro movie moments then we’ll scurry away and bask in the celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 31st August

King Ralph (1991) ITV2 11:50am-1:45pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A slobbish Las Vegas lounge singer succeeds the British throne when a freak accident wipes out the entire royal family. A loyal aristocra desperately tries to stop the loud-mouthed American unwittingly bringing the monarchy into disrepute, while a scheming lord plots to make his reign a short one. Comedy, starring John Goodman, Peter O’Toole, John Hurt and Richard Griffiths.

Grease (1978) Film4 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Rebellious American teenager Danny falls for innocent Australian girl Sandy during the summer holidays, but when he later finds out she is a new student at his school, he risks losing her love by trying to act cool in front of his friends. Romantic musical set in the 1950s, starring John Travolta, Olivia Newton-John, Stockard Channing, Jeff Conaway, Didi Conn and Barry Pearl

Rydell High T-Shirt

Ladies Grease Rydell High Cheerleading T-Shirt

Grease T-Shirt

Ladies Grease Tell Me About It Stud Quote T-Shirt

Days of Thunder (1990) E4 9:20pm-11:25pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
An arrogant racing driver is determined to seize the reigning champion’s crown, but a serious crash jeopardises his chances of ever racing again. Drama, starring Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman, Robert Duvall, Randy Quaid and John C Reilly

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) Channel 4 9:20pm-12:05am (2 hours 45 minutes)
A reprogrammed killing machine is sent back in time to the 20th century to protect John Connor, a teenage boy whose destiny is to save the human race. After breaking John’s mother out of a mental institution, the pair set out to avert a future nuclear war – pursued by an advanced prototype terminator with shape-changing powers. Sci-fi action adventure sequel, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Edward Furlong and Robert Patrick

SUNDAY 1st September

10 Things I Hate About You (1999) Channel 4 2:30pm-4:25pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Lively teenager Bianca is not allowed to start dating until her man-hating sister Kat does first – but no boy is brave enough to ask her out. However, Bianca’s would-be boyfriend thinks he has found the perfect man for the job in the shape of a quirky loner with a mysterious past. Comedy, based on Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew, starring Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Larisa Oleynik.

Every Which Way But Loose (1978) ITV4 4:45pm-7:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A truck driver travels across America with his faithful orang-utan competing in bare knuckle fights for extra cash. He becomes smitten with a country singer who subsequently vanishes without a trace, so man and ape set off in search of her – with an enraged gang of bikers in pursuit. Action comedy, starring Clint Eastwood, Sondra Locke, Geoffrey Lewis and Beverly D’Angelo.

Footloose (1984) E4 8:00pm-10:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A rebellious, hip-swinging student from the city moves to a small religious community, where he instantly clashes with an old-school fire-and-brimstone preacher – who has banned dancing and rock ‘n’ roll because he considers them immoral. Drama, starring Kevin Bacon, Lori Singer, John Lithgow, Chris Penn, Dianne Wiest and Sarah Jessica Parker

Strange Days (1995) Syfy 11:10pm-2:20am (3 hours 10 minutes)
A paranoid ex-cop dealing in illegal virtual-reality experiences receives a compact disc that contains the memories of a murderer killing a prostitute. Suspecting an old flame might be in danger, he investigates further and uncovers a secret that could throw the entire city into chaos on New Year’s Eve, 1999. Kathryn Bigelow’s sci-fi thriller, starring Ralph Fiennes, Angela Bassett, Juliette Lewis and Tom Sizemore.

Hawwooooga! Bonus movie trailer moment to get in the mood.

The answer to their question “Can you imagine Clint Eastwood sharing his feelings with an orang-utan ?
Yes, yes I can.

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember to shack it before you bake it and enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

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