Courteney Cox

Click, clunk, BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! Another retro movie weekend is here and ready to rock our lives with its movie goodness.

Dragging out, plumbing in and hooking up our trusty pressure washer, we find ourselves faced with the dirty decking from hell. Covered with many years of weather and BBQ good times, the once light and solid decking has now become darkened with age and pretty sorry for itself in places. Firing up the water machine from the future, we quickly begin to splash some lift back into it. With each pass of super high pressure water, we will reveal the hidden beauty.

SATURDAY 7th October

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Sleepless in Seattle (1993) Sony Movie Channel 9:10am-11:30am
A widowed father is coping badly with his wife’s death, but his son is convinced that what he really needs is some new romance in his life. He arranges for his dad to go on a radio phone-in show, and his touching story moves a reporter to respond, even though she is already engaged. She returns to her fiance, but the boy, certain she is the woman for his father, plots to bring them together. Romantic comedy, with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan.

Godzilla (1998) Sony Movie Channel 11:30am-2:20pm
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

Oliver! (1968) 5STAR 11:55am-2:55pm
Oscar-winning musical version of the stage play based on Charles Dickens’ classic tale about a lonely workhouse orphan who ends up on the cold streets of London, where he falls under the wing of petty crook Fagin and his gang of young backstreet thieves. Featuring the iconic songs Food, Glorious Food, Consider Yourself, As Long as He Needs Me and You’ve Got to Pick a Pocket or Two. Starring Ron Moody, Mark Lester, Oliver Reed, Jack Wild, Harry Secombe, Shani Wallis and Leonard Rossiter.

Crocodile Dundee (1986) Film4 4:55pm-6:50pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A New York reporter searches the Australian Outback for a maverick hunter with a legendary reputation, and invites the adventurer back to America. But the die-hard Aussie needs to draw on all his survival skills to adjust to life in the urban jungle. Comedy adventure, written by and starring Paul Hogan, with Linda Kozlowski, John Meillon and Mark Blum.

Crocodile Dundee II (1988) Film4 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
The rugged Australian adventurer sets out to save his reporter girlfriend from New York drug dealers. Having rescued her from their clutches, he realises they will soon be coming after him – so he decides to even the odds by luring them to the Outback for a final showdown. Comedy adventure sequel, starring Paul Hogan, Linda Kozlowski, John Meillon and Charles S Dutton.

Big Daddy (1999) Sony Movie Channel 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
An immature 32-year-old is heartbroken when his girlfriend walks out on him. In a plan to win her back, he volunteers to look after his flatmate’s five-year-old son, thus demonstrating he is finally ready to grow up. However, his ideas of childcare prove unconventional and chaos quickly ensues. Comedy, with Adam Sandler, Joey Lauren Adams, Jon Stewart, Josh Mostel, Leslie Mann, Rob Schneider and Kristy Swanson, alongside Steve Buscemi in a cameo role.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) 7:45pm-9:30pm
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

The Bone Collector (1999) Sony Movie Channel 10:00pm-11:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A quadriplegic ex-cop is saved from the brink of suicide by a rookie female officer needing his expertise to form a psychological profile of a serial killer. The murderer is posing as a cab driver and terrorising Manhattan, and has a gruesome habit of taking trophies from his victims’ bodies. Thriller, starring Denzel Washington, Angelina Jolie, Michael Rooker, Mike McGlone, Luis Guzman and Queen Latifah.

SUNDAY 8th October

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Innerspace (1987) Channel 5 12:30pm-2:50pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A Navy test pilot is shrunk in a ground-breaking scientific experiment, but instead of being injected into a laboratory rabbit, the tiny specimen accidentally winds up inside a hypochondriac supermarket worker. As he tries to find a way out, criminals come after the unlikely duo in search of the secret of the miniaturising technology. Sci-fi comedy, starring Dennis Quaid, Martin Short, Meg Ryan, Kevin McCarthy, Fiona Lewis and Vernon Wells.

Hercules (1983) Film4 1:00pm-3:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The mighty ancient Greek hero, created by the gods to be the strongest man in the world, sets out to rescue a princess from an evil wizard. However, the sorcerer has created deadly mechanical monsters to prevent his plans being thwarted. Fantasy adventure, starring Lou Ferrigno, Sybil Danning and Brad Harris.

Mannequin (1987) Channel 5 2:50pm-4:35pm
A struggling artist gets a job as a window dresser for a department store, only to discover one of his dummies is a reincarnated Egyptian princess who comes to life at night. As he falls for the living doll, she inspires him to transform the shop’s display and make it the most spectacular in town. Fantasy comedy, starring Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall. Edited for language and sexual references.

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969) Spike 6:50pm-9:00pm
Two notorious outlaws’ routine of bank and train robberies is cut short when a seemingly unstoppable posse is formed to catch them. The pair plan to flee America and start a new life in Bolivia, with the Sundance Kid’s schoolmistress lover in tow – but staying ahead of the law is not so easy. Western, starring Paul Newman, Robert Redford and Katharine Ross.

Speed 2: Cruise Control (1997) E4 9:55pm-12:20am (2 hours 25 minutes)
Feisty heroine Annie and her new boyfriend Alex take a cruise in the Bahamas, but the trip becomes a nightmare when they discover a vengeful computer genius – a former employee laid off because of his terminal illness – is also on board. He has secretly programmed the ship to crash into an oil tanker while he steals a cache of diamonds from the cargo. Action thriller sequel, with Sandra Bullock, Jason Patric and Willem Dafoe.

Gladiator (2000) Film4 9:00pm-12:00am (3 hours)
Roman general Maximus Decimus Meridius is a casualty of a power struggle between the corrupt Emperor Commodus and the senate. Ordered to be put to death along with his family, he escapes his would-be killers but is sold into slavery as a gladiator – but uses his fame in the arena to fight against the tyrant. Oscar-winning period epic, with Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix, Derek Jacobi and Oliver Reed.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, there is no such things as ‘too much cheese’ and always keep both gloves together. It’s handy…

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Cluck, click! Another retro movie weekend is here and ready to take over our TV boxes by storm!

Raise the anchor and hoist the main sale! Let’s set sail into another retro movie weekend full of adventure, singing and mischief. With our deck freshly scrubbed, our hull bulging and our minds full of wonder, we’ll begin an epic voyage into the unknown.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 21st July

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Wayne’s World (1992) 5STAR 11:05am-1:00pm
Two heavy-metal fans broadcast an amateur TV programme from their basement. A slimy network executive offers them the chance to turn professional, but as they enjoy the perks of wealth and fame, they find their show being ruined by corporate interference. Comedy, starring Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Rob Lowe, Tia Carrere and Lara Flynn Boyle, with a cameo by Alice Cooper.

Hulk (2003) ITV2 11:50am-2:35pm
Scientist Dr Bruce Banner turns into the rampaging green Hulk after exposure to a huge dose of gamma radiation, prompting the military to embark on a no-holds-barred mission to destroy the monster. Meanwhile, Banner’s unstable father resurfaces, holding the secret to his transformation. Comic-strip adventure from director Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott and Nick Nolte.

Superhero Merchandise

Grease (1978) Film4 1:00pm-3:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Rebellious American teenager Danny falls for innocent Australian girl Sandy during the summer holidays, but when he later finds out she is a new student at his school, he risks losing her love by trying to act cool in front of his friends. Romantic musical set in the 1950s, starring John Travolta, Olivia Newton-John, Stockard Channing, Jeff Conaway, Didi Conn and Sid Caesar.

Grease Clothing

A Knight’s Tale (2001) 5STAR 7:25pm-9:00pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A poverty-stricken squire spies an opportunity to make his dreams come true when his employer dies. He takes his place as a knight, launching himself on the road to riches by competing in jousting tournaments, but his ruse is jeopardised by a dastardly nobleman. Comedy adventure, starring Heath Ledger, Paul Bettany, Mark Addy, Shannyn Sossamon and Rufus Sewell.

Demolition Man (1993) Dave 9:00pm-11:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Maverick cop John Spartan is frozen alive in 1996 and held in cryonic suspension for a crime he did not commit. Decades into the future, the dictator of a seemingly utopian city unleashes a criminal psychopath against his political enemy – but he proves impossible to control, forcing the authorities to revive Spartan to defeat him. Sci-fi thriller, with Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, Sandra Bullock and Nigel Hawthorne.

Speed (1994) E4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
An LAPD cop discovers a psychopathic criminal has planted a bomb on a crowded bus, primed to go off if the vehicle drops below 50mph. He boards the vehicle and helps the hapless passenger who has been forced to take the wheel to keep a constant speed to avoid a disaster. Action thriller, starring Keanu Reeves, Sandra Bullock, Dennis Hopper and Jeff Daniels.

Fun Fact: Keanu Reeves breaking the glass on the bus door in the beginning of the movie was an accident, however it was left in the final cut.

Darkman (1990) Film4 9:00pm-10:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A scientist working on synthetic skin is horribly disfigured and left for dead by a criminal gang. Now unable to feel pain, he continues his research, creating artificial faces that will last for only a short time. He uses these disguises to aid him in taking revenge on those who mutilated him – while also using a mask of his own face to see the girlfriend who thinks he died. Thriller, starring Liam Neeson and Frances McDormand.

Passenger 57 (1992) ITV4 9:55pm-11:40pm
After his wife is shot dead during a robbery, a cop hands in his badge and takes up a job offer from an old friend to be a security adviser for a major transatlantic airline. On the flight taking him to his new employers in Los Angeles is an international terrorist being escorted to trial by the FBI – while the prisoner’s accomplices are disguised as passengers and crew and plan to hijack the plane. Action thriller, with Wesley Snipes, Bruce Payne, Tom Sizemore, Alex Datcher, Bruce Greenwood and Elizabeth Hurley.

Fun Fact: The lead role was originally offered to Sylvester Stallone but he turned it down. However, just for fun, the script writer named one of the major characters, “Sly”.

SUNDAY 22nd July

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Look Who’s Talking Now (1993) Sony Movie Channel 9:10am-11:10am
A family takes in two pet dogs, a scruffy mongrel with discipline problems and a prim and proper pedigree poodle, whose personality clashes create all sorts of mayhem for the household. Comedy sequel, starring John Travolta and Kirstie Alley, plus the voices of Diane Keaton and Danny DeVito as the canine duo.

Godzilla (1998) Sony Movie Channel 1:00pm-3:55pm
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

Octopussy (1983) ITV 3:25pm-6:00pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
James Bond investigates the mysterious death of a British agent in East Berlin, a mission that leads him to a glamorous, international jewel thief. He discovers one of her criminal cohorts, an Indian gangster, is in league with a crazed Soviet general who plans to heat up the Cold War by detonating a nuclear bomb in an American Air Force Base. Spy adventure, with Roger Moore, Maud Adams, Steven Berkoff and Louis Jourdan.

James Bond Merchandise

Titanic (1997) Film4 5:15pm-9:00pm (3 hours 45 minutes)
A party of explorers studying the sunken remains of the famous liner meets an elderly woman who was a passenger on the ill-fated maiden voyage. She recounts how she boarded the ship while on the brink of being forced into marriage by her family, and was stopped from killing herself by a penniless artist. She fell in love with her saviour, but the disaster on the horizon meant their time together was doomed to be short. James Cameron’s Oscar-winning romantic drama, starring Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, Billy Zane, Kathy Bates and Bill Paxton.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) Channel 5 5:35pm-7:10pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005) ITV 7:30pm-10:20pm (2 hours 50 minutes)
Adolescent wizard Harry is unexpectedly chosen to represent Hogwarts School in a prestigious magical tournament, despite being legally too young to enter. Along with charming sixth-year student Cedric Diggory, Harry takes on the champions of two other magical academies visiting the school facing deadly monsters in a series of death-defying challenges. Meanwhile, the followers of the dreaded Lord Voldemort plot to restore their master to the land of the living. Fourth instalment of the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Robbie Coltrane, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Brendan Gleeson and Robert Pattinson.

Harry Potter Merchandise

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, keep dry, keep smiling and keep the good times rollin!

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Run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run!It’s time for another super special Retro Movie Rundown Easter Special!

Hopping and leaping our way around the TV schedule, we’ve sniffed out a whole hear of hidden retro movie eggs for you all to feast on this long weekend. Unwrapping each film like our Easter chocolatey goodness, we’ll take stock of our collection, before selecting only the biggest and best choices and devouring them in true ’tis but once a year style’.

Happy retro movie Easter weekend everyone!

FRIDAY 14th April

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The Phantom
(1996) Channel 4 10:00am-11:55am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A jungle-dwelling masked adventurer leaves his African home for New York in a bid to stop the power-crazed schemes of an evil industrialist. The tycoon is on the hunt for three legendary magical skulls, which can be combined to form the ultimate weapon. Superhero adventure, starring Billy Zane, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Treat Williams and Patrick McGoohan.

The Muppet Movie (1979) Film4 11:00am-12:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Kermit the frog is persuaded by his agent that he has a future in movies. He sets off on a journey across America to realise his dream, gathering a crowd of like-minded friends along the way – but the owner of a French restaurant plans to make him the dish of the day. Comedy, starring Dom DeLuise and Charles Durning alongside the puppet characters, with cameos from Mel Brooks, Orson Welles and Steve Martin.

The Muppets TShirts

Labyrinth (1986) 5STAR 11:05am-1:10pm
A teenager wishes her baby brother would be taken away, only to have her request granted by a band of goblins and their sinister king. She regrets her decision and sets out to rescue him, but to reach the castle where he is being held, she must find her way through a magical maze full of strange creatures. Jim Henson’s fantasy adventure, starring Jennifer Connelly and David Bowie.

Labyrinth Clothing

On the Buses (1971) ITV3 11:25am-1:15pm
Wily bus driver Stan Butler thinks a new company policy that allows women behind the wheel will rob him of his precious overtime money. Enlisting the aid of conductor Jack, he does everything he can to sabotage the plan. Comedy, based on the TV series, starring Reg Varney, Bob Grant, Stephen Lewis, Doris Hare, Peter Madden and Anna Karen.

The Great Muppet Caper (1981) Film4 12:55pm-3:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Reporters Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear are sacked for missing out on a massive scoop about the theft of jewellery from famous British fashion designer Lady Holiday. To try to re-establish their reputations, the duo and Gonzo fly to London to see if they can track down the culprit. Comedy, with the voices of Jim Henson and Frank Oz, with cameo appearances by John Cleese, Diana Rigg, Charles Grodin and Peter Ustinov.

The Muppets Merchandise

Jumanji (1995) Sony Channel 2:20pm-4:30pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A man who has been trapped inside a mysterious jungle board game for 26 years is eventually freed when two children start to play it. Unfortunately, he arrives with a rampaging horde of animals on his heels, leaving only one solution – to finish the game he started all those years ago. Fantasy adventure, starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst and Bonnie Hunt.

You’ve Got Mail (1998) 5STAR 4:05pm-6:30pm
Two rivals in the bookshop business fall in love over the internet, unaware they know and dislike each other in the real world. While things remain frosty in person, the pair’s anonymous online relationship continues to blossom. Romantic comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Greg Kinnear, Parker Posey and Dabney Coleman.

Muppet Treasure Island (1996) Film4 4:40pm-6:50pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A youngster finds a treasure map and joins an expedition searching for a famous buccaneer’s lost treasure on an unexplored island. However, their mission falls foul of a band of pirates hiding out among the crew. Musical comedy based on Robert Louis Stevenson’s novel, starring Tim Curry, Billy Connolly, Jennifer Saunders and Kevin Bishop alongside the puppet characters.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) GOLD 7:35pm-9:10pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Lethal Weapon 3 (1992) Dave 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Detectives Riggs and Murtaugh team up with a reformed small-time crook and a tough, female internal-affairs investigator to track down a former policeman trafficking impounded weaponry to the bosses of organised crime. Action thriller sequel, starring Mel Gibson, Danny Glover, Joe Pesci and Rene Russo.

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) GOLD 9:10pm-11:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The eccentric pet detective is coaxed out of self-imposed exile in a Buddhist monastery to visit Africa and help search for a sacred white bat. However, his unique investigative talents are tested to the limits as he faces a race against time to find the missing creature and prevent a tribal war. Comedy sequel, starring Jim Carrey, Simon Callow and Bob Gunton.

The Deer Hunter (1978) ITV4 11:20pm-1:30am
The lives of three American steelworkers and their families are torn apart in the wake of the Vietnam War. After enduring horrific treatment in a prison camp during the conflict, the three friends return to their homes but struggle to readjust to normal life. Oscar-winning drama, starring Robert De Niro, Christopher Walken, Meryl Streep, John Savage and John Cazale in his last film role.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) BBC1 11:45pm-1:20am (1 hour 35 minutes)
The chauvinistic host of a top-rated American news programme in 1970s San Diego fights for his status and job security when both are threatened by the arrival of an ambitious female reporter, whose determination to become a newsreader leads to a bitter battle of the sexes. Comedy, starring Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Fred Willard and Steve Carell.

SATURDAY 15th April

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The Flintstones
(1994) ITV 11:35am-1:20pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Blue-collar caveman Fred Flintstone is promoted to an executive position at work and unwittingly becomes embroiled in an embezzlement scheme – thanks in no small part to his seductive new assistant. Live-action version of the cartoon comedy, starring John Goodman, Rick Moranis, Rosie O’Donnell, Halle Berry and Elizabeth Taylor.

Matilda (1996) Sony Channel 12:00pm-2:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Roald Dahl Merchandise

Home Alone (1990) Film4 1:00pm-3:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O’Hara and John Candy.

Home Alone Merchandise

The Secret of My Success (1987) ITV 1:20pm-3:30pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A naive country boy travels to New York to make his fortune, only to end up working in a corporation’s mail room. He chances on a vacant office and hatches a plan to pass himself off as a top-ranking executive, but leading a double life proves harder than expected. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, Helen Slater, Richard Jordan and Fred Gwynne.

Bean (1997) ITV2 6:45pm-8:30pm
The hapless fool is employed as a security guard for a British art gallery and is sent to Los Angeles to bring back a famous painting. Unfortunately, he finds himself mistaken for a renowned art professor and invited to make an important presentation. Mel Smith’s British comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Burt Reynolds, Peter MacNicol, John Mills, Peter Capaldi and June Brown.

Clear and Present Danger (1994) ITV4 9:00pm-11:50pm
A CIA analyst gets caught up in the Colombian drug trade while trying to track down terrorists responsible for the murder of a close friend of the US president – but his investigations point to illegal activity and corruption at the very top of government. Action thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, with Harrison Ford reprising his role from Patriot Games alongside Willem Dafoe, Anne Archer and James Earl Jones.

SUNDAY 16th April

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Thunderball
(1965) ITV 12:00pm-2:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
James Bond travels to the Bahamas on the trail of two nuclear warheads stolen from a British aircraft. The lethal weapons have fallen into the hands of international crime syndicate Spectre, which plans to fire them at the US coast unless an exorbitant ransom is paid. Spy adventure, starring Sean Connery, Claudine Auger, Adolfo Celi and Lois Maxwell.

James Bond TShirts

Cool Runnings (1993) BBC1 2:15pm-3:50pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A sprinter fails to qualify for the Jamaican Olympic squad, but refuses to give up his dream. Learning that a former US bobsleigh coach is living nearby, he seizes the chance to shine in an entirely different sport, and cajoles three of his friends to join him in training for the 1988 Winter Olympics in the far less tropical environment of Canada. Fact-based comedy, with John Candy, Leon, Doug E Doug and Malik Yoba.

Oliver! (1968) Channel 5 5:20pm-8:00pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Oscar-winning musical version of the stage play based on Charles Dickens’ classic tale about a lonely workhouse orphan who ends up on the cold streets of London, where he falls under the wing of petty crook Fagin and his gang of young backstreet thieves. Featuring the iconic songs Food, Glorious Food, Consider Yourself, As Long as He Needs Me and You’ve Got to Pick a Pocket or Two. Starring Ron Moody, Mark Lester, Oliver Reed, Jack Wild, Harry Secombe, Shani Wallis and Leonard Rossiter.

Mission: Impossible 2 (2000) Film4 6:35pm-9:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Secret agent Ethan Hunt sent to find and destroy the only sample of a deadly man-made virus. However, he faces tough opposition in a former spy-turned-criminal mastermind who has already acquired the cure and now wants the pathogen itself. Director John Woo’s action thriller sequel, starring Tom Cruise, Dougray Scott, Thandie Newton and Anthony Hopkins.

Apocalypse Now (1979) Spike 9:00pm-12:00am (3 hours)
An army captain is sent on a top-secret mission into Cambodia, where his goal is to find and assassinate a renegade colonel who has gone insane and is worshipped by his followers as a god. However, as his patrol boat journeys further upriver, the conflict and disarray surrounding him becomes increasingly disturbing and nightmarish. Francis Ford Coppola’s Vietnam War drama, starring Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando and Robert Duvall.

The Dirty Dozen (1967) ITV4 9:05pm-12:10am
An uncompromising major is placed in charge of a seemingly suicidal mission to destroy a French chateau being used as a base by Nazi officers. Needing tough but expendable soldiers for the task, he recruits 12 hardened criminals from a military prison. Second World War action adventure, starring Lee Marvin, Telly Savalas, Ernest Borgnine, Charles Bronson and Donald Sutherland.

MONDAY 17th April

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Kingpin
(1996) Channel 4 1:00am-3:00am (2 hours)
A former 10-pin bowling champion prodigy turns conman and hits the bottle when an accident leads to the loss of his hand. To revive his flagging fortunes, he goes all out to persuade a gifted Amish man to take up the sport professionally so he can cash in on his prize-winnings. Comedy from the Farrelly brothers, starring Woody Harrelson, Randy Quaid, Vanessa Angel and Bill Murray.

Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989) Film4 11:00am-12:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A professor invents a ray with the power to reduce objects in size. Unfortunately, his kids and their meddling friends activate it and are shrunk to microscopic proportions. When they are accidentally thrown out with the rubbish, the children have to contend with all kinds of animals and insects on their journey home across the backyard. Disney comedy, with Rick Moranis, Marcia Strassman and Amy O’Neill.

Patch Adams (1998) Sony Channel 1:15pm-3:45pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
A talented student doctor turns the medical community upside down with his offbeat views about the healing power of laughter. His methods provoke outrage and intense debate among his professors – but his extrovert nature brightens the lives of all kinds of patients. Comedy drama, starring Robin Williams, Monica Potter, Daniel London, Bob Gunton and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Coming to America (1988) GOLD 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A bored African prince defies his father’s plans for an arranged marriage and escapes to the USA to find a bride on his own terms. Comedy, starring Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall in several roles, with James Earl Jones, Allison Dean, Eriq La Salle and Madge Sinclair.

Whatever you’re up to this loooong weekend, happy hunting and have a barrel full of fun!

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Sweet potato pie! Time to roll on another fun-filled weekend! We’ll, be rude not to right?

As we set sail once again into the unknown of another retro movie weekend, we find ourselves frantically checking, double checking and just once more for good measure our supplies that will see us through the duration. Crisps and dip? Check! Popcorn? Check! Snuggly duvet with pillows? Check! Enough tea and milk to supply a small country? Double check! So, let our retro movie rundown guide you through the top adventures that await you this weekend, taking you to far and distant lands. Enjoy!

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 19th MARCH

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Big (1988) E4 2:00pm-4:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A boy ridiculed for his size makes a wish on a fairground machine to become bigger – only to wake up as a 30-year-old man. Driven from his home by his terrified mother, the bewildered youngster trapped in a grown-up body makes his way to New York, where he rises high in the ranks of a toy manufacturing company and applies his youthful enthusiasm to the complexities of adult life. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins and Robert Loggia.

The Phantom (1996) Film4 4:40pm-6:40pm (2 hours)
A jungle-dwelling masked adventurer leaves his African home for New York in a bid to stop the power-crazed schemes of an evil industrialist. The tycoon is on the hunt for three legendary magical skulls, which can be combined to form the ultimate weapon. Superhero adventure, starring Billy Zane, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Treat Williams and Patrick McGoohan.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) Comedy Central 6:15pm-8:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992) Film4 6:40pm-9:00pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Hapless youngster Kevin somehow manages to catch the wrong plane and finds himself heading for New York, while his family jets off to Florida. Having got his hands on his father’s credit card, he is enjoying the good life staying in a luxury hotel – until he bumps into two familiar burglars with an axe to grind. Comedy sequel, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, Brenda Fricker and Tim Curry.

The Mummy (1999) ITV2 7:40pm-10:00pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A soldier of fortune joins an academic and her conniving brother on an expedition to an ancient Egyptian lost city. The explorers accidentally cause the spirit of a vengeful priest with awe-inspiring supernatural powers to rise from his tomb, leading to a desperate battle for survival. Fantasy action adventure, starring Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo and Oded Fehr.

The Day After Tomorrow (2004) Channel 4 7:40pm-10:00pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A climatologist warns global warming will soon result in destructive freak weather, or even another ice age. He thinks the world still has time to prepare for the worst, but the crisis happens almost immediately – and as storms, earthquakes and hurricanes strike in terrifying fashion, he races across America to rescue his son from a frozen New York. Disaster thriller, with Jake Gyllenhaal and Dennis Quaid.

Fun Fact: The consultation by NASA scientists was requested before the filming of the movie, but NASA stated that the events in the film were too ridiculous to actually occur, and hence denied the request.

Yes Man (2008) ITV 11:00pm-1:00am (2 hours)
A depressed and anti-social loans adviser attends a self-improvement course and decides to start saying yes to every opportunity that comes his way. His outlook is immediately transformed, but he soon realises that some invitations should not be accepted and struggles to find a balance in his life. Comedy, loosely based on the autobiographical book by Danny Wallace, starring Jim Carrey, Zooey Deschanel, Bradley Cooper and John Michael Higgins.

SUNDAY 20th MARCH

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The Incredible Hulk
(2008) ITV2 1:30pm-3:40pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A bungled experiment causes a scientist to turn into a monster whenever he gets angry. He travels the world seeking a cure for his condition, while a ruthless general is determined to capture him and use the creature as a weapon. However, one of the soldiers under the officer’s command undergoes a terrifying transformation of his own. Comic-book adventure, starring Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth and William Hurt.

Hulk Merchandise

Octopussy (1983) ITV 4:10pm-6:35pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
James Bond investigates the mysterious death of a British agent in East Berlin, a mission that leads him to a glamorous, international jewel thief. He discovers one of her criminal cohorts, an Indian gangster, is in league with a crazed Soviet general who plans to heat up the Cold War by detonating a nuclear bomb in an American Air Force Base. Spy adventure, with Roger Moore, Maud Adams, Steven Berkoff and Louis Jourdan.

Fun Fact: Released in the same year as the rival James Bond production Never Say Never Again (1983) which showcased the return of Sean Connery to the role. “Octopussy” made $187 million worldwide, “Never Say Never Again” $160 million.

10 Things I Hate About You (1999) Film4 4:55pm-6:50pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Lively teenager Bianca is not allowed to start dating until her man-hating sister Kat does first – but no boy is brave enough to ask her out. However, Bianca’s would-be boyfriend thinks he has found the perfect man for the job in the shape of a quirky loner with a mysterious past. Comedy, based on Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew, starring Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Larisa Oleynik.

Liar Liar (1997) ITV2 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A lawyer, whose underhand ploys to win cases leave him little time to see his son, discovers he is incapable of lying after the boy’s birthday wish makes his dad tell only the truth. However, this causes a host of problems as the attorney tries to muddle his way through a high-profile divorce settlement. Comedy, with Jim Carrey, Maura Tierney, Justin Cooper, Jennifer Tilly and Cary Elwes.

US Marshals (1998) ITV4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A federal marshal sets out in pursuit of an escaped prisoner who is determined to prove his murder conviction was false. As the chase progresses, the marshal is forced to work with a diplomatic security agent, making him realise the fugitive is no ordinary convict and that his claims of innocence may be true. Thriller sequel, starring Tommy Lee Jones reprising his Oscar-winning role from The Fugitive, alongside Wesley Snipes and Robert Downey Jr.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember that sometimes when you feel hungry, you might just be thirsty and that sometimes the best thing you can give someone is your time.
xoxo

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