Hulk

Splish, splash… another retro movie weekend is here! Let’s stir up some super sweet retro movie goodness.

Clicking on the kettle like shaking hands with an old and trusted friend, we’ll begin to gather all the essential bits and bobs from all the various locations. Selecting the perfect mug from the bunch, we’ll pluck out our next tea baggy victim, throw in just the right amount of sugar and then begin to fill our mug to the perfect level. Watching the clear liquid quickly turn into a familiar shade of brown with a stir with the spoon, we’ll begin to dream of the tea creation we are so close to complete before we can sit back and enjoy the weekends retro movie wonder.

SATURDAY 23rd September

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Look Who’s Talking Too (1990) Sony Movie Channel 9:00am-10:35am (1 hour 35 minutes)
Wisecracking toddler Mikey is joined by mischievous baby sister Julie and sibling rivalry inevitably erupts – while their parents have problems of their own to deal with, in the shape of the kids’ good-for-nothing uncle. Comedy sequel, starring John Travolta and Kirstie Alley, with the voices of Bruce Willis and Rosanne Barr.

The Rugrats Movie (1999) Film4 11:00am-12:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Tommy tries to return his new brother to the baby shop, helped by Angelica, Chuckie, Phil and Lil – but the friends get lost in dense woodlands en route, turning their expedition into a scary and exciting journey of discovery. Animated comedy based on the TV series, with the voices of Elizabeth Daily, Christine Cavanaugh, Kath Soucie, Whoopi Goldberg and Busta Rhymes.

Matilda (1996) Sony Movie Channel 2:20pm-4:25pm
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Roald Dahl Merchandise

Babe (1995) ITV2 3:30pm-5:10pm
A kindly farmer wins a cute piglet, which some greedy humans and jealous animals hope will end up as the Christmas roast. Undaunted, the young pig proves himself useful on the farm and enlists the aid of the resident dog in learning how to herd sheep. Family comedy, starring James Cromwell and Magda Szubanski, with Christine Cavanaugh, Miriam Margolyes and Hugo Weaving among those providing the voices of the animal characters.

Jumanji (1995) Sony Movie Channel 4:25pm-6:35pm
A man who has been trapped inside a mysterious jungle board game for 26 years is eventually freed when two children start to play it. Unfortunately, he arrives with a rampaging horde of animals on his heels, leaving only one solution – to finish the game he started all those years ago. Fantasy adventure, starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst and Bonnie Hunt.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986) ITV4 4:35pm-6:45pm
A cocky teenager plays truant from school and spends the day dragging his girlfriend and a reluctant friend into all manner of crazy adventures in the big city – while the school’s dean of students vows to stop at nothing to prove the youngster is faking illness. Comedy, starring Matthew Broderick, Mia Sara, Alan Ruck, Jennifer Grey, Jeffrey Jones and Charlie Sheen.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Clothing

Airplane II: The Sequel (1982) Film4 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Hapless hero Ted Striker tries to prevent the launch of a passenger space shuttle, certain it will end in disaster. Sadly, his prediction comes true when a computer malfunction sends the spacecraft hurtling toward the sun, while a man driven mad by sexual inadequacy smuggles a bomb on board. Disaster movie spoof sequel, starring Robert Hays, Julie Hagerty, Lloyd Bridges, William Shatner, Sonny Bono and Chad Everett.

Airplane! TShirts

Speed (1994) Film4 9:00pm-11:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An LAPD cop discovers a psychopathic criminal has planted a bomb on a crowded bus, primed to go off if the vehicle drops below 50mph. He boards the vehicle and helps the hapless passenger who has been forced to take the wheel to keep a constant speed to avoid a disaster. Action thriller, starring Keanu Reeves, Sandra Bullock, Dennis Hopper and Jeff Daniels.

There’s Something About Mary (1998) 5STAR 9:00pm-11:25pm
A lovelorn man hires a sleazy private eye to track down his high-school sweetheart in the hope of rekindling their brief relationship. By unfortunate coincidence, the detective also falls for her, and then it emerges there are even more men out there competing for her affections. Comedy from the Farrelly brothers, starring Cameron Diaz, Ben Stiller, Matt Dillon and Lee Evans.

SUNDAY 24th September

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Hulk
(2003) Channel 4 1:30pm-4:10pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Scientist Dr Bruce Banner turns into the rampaging green Hulk after exposure to a huge dose of gamma radiation, prompting the military to embark on a no-holds-barred mission to destroy the monster. Meanwhile, Banner’s unstable father resurfaces, holding the secret to his transformation. Comic-book adventure from director Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott and Nick Nolte.

Superhero Gifts

The Four Musketeers (1974) Film4 3:00pm-5:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The swashbuckling heroes, with young swordsman D’Artagnan promoted to their ranks, are sent to quell an uprising against the king. But the scheming Cardinal Richelieu continues plotting to seize power, while his treacherous partner-in-crime Milady de Winter has revenge in mind. Adventure sequel, starring Oliver Reed, Michael York, Charlton Heston, Faye Dunaway, Christopher Lee, Richard Chamberlain and Frank Finlay.

The Dam Busters (1954) ITV4 3:15pm-5:55pm
The story of the destruction of the major dams in Germany’s industrial heartland in the Ruhr valley in 1943, a mission that seemed impossible until engineer and scientist Barnes Wallis came up with the ingenious idea of bouncing bombs, and the pilots of 617 Squadron were trained to fly the crucial mission. Second World War drama, with Michael Redgrave, Richard Todd, Basil Sydney, Derek Farr and Ursula Jeans.

Fun Fact: The bombs shown in the movie were the wrong shape because the actual shape (a stubby cylinder) was still secret at the time.

Volcano (1997) E4 8:00pm-10:00pm (2 hours)
A river of molten lava spews from an erupting volcano onto the streets of Los Angeles, prompting the head of a crisis agency to team up with an intrepid scientist in a frantic and dangerous bid to save the city’s residents. Disaster thriller, starring Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, Gaby Hoffmann, Keith David and Don Cheadle.

The Rainmaker (1997) Sony Movie Channel 10:00pm-11:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
An idealistic newly qualified lawyer teams up with a disreputable researcher to champion the cause of a leukaemia sufferer whose mother is suing an insurance company for refusing to pay his medical costs. As the case progresses, the young legal eagle finds he has much to learn about the dark side of the judicial process. Francis Ford Coppola’s courtroom drama adapted from the novel by John Grisham, starring Matt Damon, Danny DeVito, Jon Voight, Claire Danes and Mickey Rourke.

Boyz N the Hood (1991) BBC2 11:15pm-1:00am
A bright but underachieving teenager with a domineering single father strikes up a friendship with two brothers, and over time, the three young men each follow their own path – but a tragedy eventually leaves them facing a dangerous choice. Drama, starring Cuba Gooding Jr, Laurence Fishburne, Morris Chestnut and Ice Cube.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, don’t forget to recycle and always keep your socks dry.

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Great paw prints and tail wags! Another retro movie weekend is here and ready to spread its movie goodness all over the lands!

Picking up the lead from the designated hook, the excitement starts to build. Pulling on each boot, we’re met with a cold and wet nose, excited whimpers and the sound of paws scampering around on the hard floor. Clipping the lead onto our super excited little ball of fur’s lead, we’ll open the door and begin our adventure into the wilderness.

SATURDAY 9th September

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The Secret Garden (1993) ITV3 10:10am-12:15pm
An orphan is sent to live with her uncle in his forbidding Yorkshire mansion, where she meets her bedridden cousin – a boy she knew nothing about. She also stumbles across a marvellous but neglected garden, and sets about nursing them both back to health, with the help of a lad from a nearby village. Children’s drama, based on Frances Hodgson Burnett’s book, with Kate Maberly, Heydon Prowse, Andrew Knott, Maggie Smith and John Lynch.

Napoleon Dynamite (2004) Film4 1:00pm-2:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A socially inept high-school student and his lonely unemployed brother find their eccentric home life thrown into upheaval when their meddling uncle comes to stay. The teenage oddball tries to make the best of his changing circumstances, while putting all his skills to the task of helping his new best friend win the class presidency. Comedy, starring Jon Heder, Efren Ramirez and Haylie Duff.

Napoleon Dynamite TShirts

Harry and the Hendersons (1987) 5STAR 2:55pm-5:05pm
A hapless family’s camping holiday in the mountains is brought to a sudden end when they accidentally hit the legendary Bigfoot with their car. They decide to adopt the endearing creature, but have more trouble than expected trying to keep him concealed and to avoid arousing their neighbours’ suspicions. Comedy, starring John Lithgow, Melinda Dillon, David Suchet, Don Ameche and Kevin Peter Hall.

Seven Years in Tibet (1997) Film4 6:20pm-9:00pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
An arrogant Austrian mountaineer tries to become the first to conquer a peak in India that has claimed the lives of 11 previous climbers. However, the outbreak of the Second World War leaves him languishing in a PoW camp. He escapes and ends up in the holy city of Lhasa, where he befriends the 14-year-old Dalai Lama and learns the meaning of inner peace. Fact-based drama, starring Brad Pitt, David Thewlis and BD Wong.

The Incredible Hulk (2008) ITV2 6:50pm-9:00pm
A bungled experiment causes a scientist to turn into a monster whenever he gets angry. He travels the world seeking a cure for his condition, while a ruthless general is determined to capture him and use the creature as a weapon. However, one of the soldiers under the officer’s command undergoes a terrifying transformation of his own. Comic-book adventure, starring Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth and William Hurt.

Superhero Gifts

American Pie 2 (2001) ITV2 9:00pm-11:10pm
The teenagers reunite after their first year at college to spend the summer at a lake house. Jim is concerned by his lack of sexual experience, and goes in search of an old flame, Oz struggles to keep a long-term relationship going, and Finch tries to master the art of tantric sex. Comedy sequel, starring Jason Biggs, Chris Klein, Seann William Scott, Alyson Hannigan and Eugene Levy.

South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999) Dave 9:00pm-10:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
The crusading grown-ups of the Colorado town lead America into war against Canada in a bid to eradicate bad language from TV. The four young heroes set out to bring peace to the world, but have to battle a fearsome alliance between Satan and Saddam Hussein. Animated musical comedy, with the voices of Trey Parker and Matt Stone, as well as George Clooney, Eric Idle and Isaac Hayes.

Double Jeopardy (1999) ITV4 11:15pm-1:30am
A man fakes his own death and frames his wife for murder, but after six years in prison she is released. Since the woman has already served her time, she has nothing to lose by really killing him – but her mission of vengeance is complicated by a zealous parole officer determined to stop her. Thriller, starring Ashley Judd, Tommy Lee Jones, Bruce Greenwood and Annabeth Gish.

What Women Want (2000) BBC2 10:45pm-12:45am (2 hours)
A freak accident gives a womanising executive the ability to hear the thoughts of the opposite sex. Embittered after losing out on promotion to a female colleague, he uses his new-found talent to exact revenge – but the insight it provides ultimately brings out an unexpected sensitive side. Romantic comedy, starring Mel Gibson, Helen Hunt, Marisa Tomei, Alan Alda and Bette Midler.

SUNDAY 10th September

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Hook (1991) Sony Movie Channel 12:30pm-3:35pm
Peter Pan, who has finally grown up and is now a married lawyer with a family of his own, is whisked away by Tinkerbell to Neverland, where he must learn to fly again if he is to save his children from the clutches of Captain Hook. Steven Spielberg’s fantasy adventure, with Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman, Julia Roberts, Bob Hoskins and Maggie Smith.

You’ve Got Mail (1998) ITV 1:00pm-3:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Two rivals in the bookshop business fall in love over the internet, unaware they know and dislike each other in the real world. While things remain frosty in person, the pair’s anonymous online relationship continues to blossom. Romantic comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Greg Kinnear, Parker Posey and Dabney Coleman.

The Pink Panther (1963) ITV4 5:00pm-7:30pm
The world’s most inept police detective, Inspector Clouseau, heads off to Switzerland in search of a suave jewel thief who has purloined a priceless diamond from a princess – but the bumbling officer’s every ruse to foil the crime ends in chaos, not least when he is framed for the robbery himself. Blake Edwards’ comedy, starring Peter Sellers, David Niven, Capucine, Robert Wagner and Claudia Cardinale.

Gladiator (2000) Film4 9:00pm-12:00am (3 hours)
Roman general Maximus Decimus Meridius is a casualty of a power struggle between the corrupt Emperor Commodus and the senate. Ordered to be put to death along with his family, he escapes his would-be killers but is sold into slavery as a gladiator – but uses his fame in the arena to fight against the tyrant. Oscar-winning period epic, with Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix, Derek Jacobi and Oliver Reed, in his last film role.

Godzilla (1998) Sony Movie Channel 11:50pm-1:40am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, keep dry, keep calm and keep being awesome!

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Cluck, click! Another retro movie weekend is here and ready to take over our TV boxes by storm!

Raise the anchor and hoist the main sale! Let’s set sail into another retro movie weekend full of adventure, singing and mischief. With our deck freshly scrubbed, our hull bulging and our minds full of wonder, we’ll begin an epic voyage into the unknown.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 21st July

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Wayne’s World (1992) 5STAR 11:05am-1:00pm
Two heavy-metal fans broadcast an amateur TV programme from their basement. A slimy network executive offers them the chance to turn professional, but as they enjoy the perks of wealth and fame, they find their show being ruined by corporate interference. Comedy, starring Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Rob Lowe, Tia Carrere and Lara Flynn Boyle, with a cameo by Alice Cooper.

Hulk (2003) ITV2 11:50am-2:35pm
Scientist Dr Bruce Banner turns into the rampaging green Hulk after exposure to a huge dose of gamma radiation, prompting the military to embark on a no-holds-barred mission to destroy the monster. Meanwhile, Banner’s unstable father resurfaces, holding the secret to his transformation. Comic-strip adventure from director Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott and Nick Nolte.

Superhero Merchandise

Grease (1978) Film4 1:00pm-3:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Rebellious American teenager Danny falls for innocent Australian girl Sandy during the summer holidays, but when he later finds out she is a new student at his school, he risks losing her love by trying to act cool in front of his friends. Romantic musical set in the 1950s, starring John Travolta, Olivia Newton-John, Stockard Channing, Jeff Conaway, Didi Conn and Sid Caesar.

Grease Clothing

A Knight’s Tale (2001) 5STAR 7:25pm-9:00pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A poverty-stricken squire spies an opportunity to make his dreams come true when his employer dies. He takes his place as a knight, launching himself on the road to riches by competing in jousting tournaments, but his ruse is jeopardised by a dastardly nobleman. Comedy adventure, starring Heath Ledger, Paul Bettany, Mark Addy, Shannyn Sossamon and Rufus Sewell.

Demolition Man (1993) Dave 9:00pm-11:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Maverick cop John Spartan is frozen alive in 1996 and held in cryonic suspension for a crime he did not commit. Decades into the future, the dictator of a seemingly utopian city unleashes a criminal psychopath against his political enemy – but he proves impossible to control, forcing the authorities to revive Spartan to defeat him. Sci-fi thriller, with Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, Sandra Bullock and Nigel Hawthorne.

Speed (1994) E4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
An LAPD cop discovers a psychopathic criminal has planted a bomb on a crowded bus, primed to go off if the vehicle drops below 50mph. He boards the vehicle and helps the hapless passenger who has been forced to take the wheel to keep a constant speed to avoid a disaster. Action thriller, starring Keanu Reeves, Sandra Bullock, Dennis Hopper and Jeff Daniels.

Fun Fact: Keanu Reeves breaking the glass on the bus door in the beginning of the movie was an accident, however it was left in the final cut.

Darkman (1990) Film4 9:00pm-10:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A scientist working on synthetic skin is horribly disfigured and left for dead by a criminal gang. Now unable to feel pain, he continues his research, creating artificial faces that will last for only a short time. He uses these disguises to aid him in taking revenge on those who mutilated him – while also using a mask of his own face to see the girlfriend who thinks he died. Thriller, starring Liam Neeson and Frances McDormand.

Passenger 57 (1992) ITV4 9:55pm-11:40pm
After his wife is shot dead during a robbery, a cop hands in his badge and takes up a job offer from an old friend to be a security adviser for a major transatlantic airline. On the flight taking him to his new employers in Los Angeles is an international terrorist being escorted to trial by the FBI – while the prisoner’s accomplices are disguised as passengers and crew and plan to hijack the plane. Action thriller, with Wesley Snipes, Bruce Payne, Tom Sizemore, Alex Datcher, Bruce Greenwood and Elizabeth Hurley.

Fun Fact: The lead role was originally offered to Sylvester Stallone but he turned it down. However, just for fun, the script writer named one of the major characters, “Sly”.

SUNDAY 22nd July

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Look Who’s Talking Now (1993) Sony Movie Channel 9:10am-11:10am
A family takes in two pet dogs, a scruffy mongrel with discipline problems and a prim and proper pedigree poodle, whose personality clashes create all sorts of mayhem for the household. Comedy sequel, starring John Travolta and Kirstie Alley, plus the voices of Diane Keaton and Danny DeVito as the canine duo.

Godzilla (1998) Sony Movie Channel 1:00pm-3:55pm
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

Octopussy (1983) ITV 3:25pm-6:00pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
James Bond investigates the mysterious death of a British agent in East Berlin, a mission that leads him to a glamorous, international jewel thief. He discovers one of her criminal cohorts, an Indian gangster, is in league with a crazed Soviet general who plans to heat up the Cold War by detonating a nuclear bomb in an American Air Force Base. Spy adventure, with Roger Moore, Maud Adams, Steven Berkoff and Louis Jourdan.

James Bond Merchandise

Titanic (1997) Film4 5:15pm-9:00pm (3 hours 45 minutes)
A party of explorers studying the sunken remains of the famous liner meets an elderly woman who was a passenger on the ill-fated maiden voyage. She recounts how she boarded the ship while on the brink of being forced into marriage by her family, and was stopped from killing herself by a penniless artist. She fell in love with her saviour, but the disaster on the horizon meant their time together was doomed to be short. James Cameron’s Oscar-winning romantic drama, starring Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, Billy Zane, Kathy Bates and Bill Paxton.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) Channel 5 5:35pm-7:10pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005) ITV 7:30pm-10:20pm (2 hours 50 minutes)
Adolescent wizard Harry is unexpectedly chosen to represent Hogwarts School in a prestigious magical tournament, despite being legally too young to enter. Along with charming sixth-year student Cedric Diggory, Harry takes on the champions of two other magical academies visiting the school facing deadly monsters in a series of death-defying challenges. Meanwhile, the followers of the dreaded Lord Voldemort plot to restore their master to the land of the living. Fourth instalment of the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Robbie Coltrane, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Brendan Gleeson and Robert Pattinson.

Harry Potter Merchandise

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, keep dry, keep smiling and keep the good times rollin!

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Crisps and dips! It’s Retro Movie Rundown O’Clock!

So with an entire weekend of classic movie goodness topped with some more modern releases icing, we find ourselves once again stashing up on all the essentials needed to complete our movie mission; milk in the fridge (for cereal and tea making abilities), big soft duvet, chocolate for obvious reasons and of course a whoooooole bunch of time and quiet….which is usually where things fall apart. With all these things in place, it’s time to draw the curtains, unplug the phone (is that still a thing?) and dive into the weekends movies! See you there.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 20th August

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Short Circuit 2
(1988) Film4 1:00pm-3:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Manic mechanoid Johnny Five meets an old friend in New York City and embarks on a fact-finding tour – but ends up entangled in a series of escapades culminating in a bank robbery. Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Fisher Stevens, Michael McKean, Cynthia Gibb and Jack Weston, with the voice of Tim Blaney.

Batteries Not Included (1987) ITV2 2:45pm-4:50pm
A family of tiny alien spacecraft intervenes to help the residents of a run-down Manhattan brownstone tenement stop greedy developers from demolishing their homes. However, the miniature flying saucers have the odds stacked against them as they bravely do all they can to save the day. Sci-fi fantasy, starring Jessica Tandy, Hume Cronyn, Frank McRae and Elizabeth Pena.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) Film4 3:20pm-6:20pm (3 hours)
The war between the shape-shifting robots erupts once again, as the first of the evil Decepticons leads an attack on Earth to locate an ancient planet-destroying machine. Hapless teenager Sam Witwicky is caught in the middle of the ensuing conflict as he holds the key to discovering the location of the device. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox.

Transformers TShirts

Enemy of the State (1998) Sky 1 9:00pm-11:30pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
A chance encounter with an old friend derails a successful lawyer’s fast-track career, plunging him headlong into a deadly game of cat and mouse with relentless government agents capable of anticipating his every move. He quickly realises the only way to save his own life is to expose the truths his pursuers seem so intent on covering up, and seeks out a former intelligence agent to take them on at their own game. Thriller, starring Will Smith, Gene Hackman, Jon Voight and Lisa Bonet.

Die Hard (1988) E4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom – and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia.

Child’s Play 2 (1990) ITV4 11:00pm-12:45am
Murderous doll Chucky is accidentally resurrected by an unwitting toy manufacturer, and seeks out his former owner to continue his efforts to regain a human body. Horror, starring Alex Vincent, Jenny Agutter, Gerrit Graham, Christine Elise and Grace Zabriskie.

SUNDAY 21st August

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Father of the Bride Part II
(1995) BBC2 1:00pm-2:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A put-upon father has just got used to his daughter being married, when he learns she is pregnant. Thrown into a mid-life crisis, he impulsively sells his house so he and his wife can buy the seafront retreat they had always dreamed about – only for responsibility to come crashing back on him when his wife reveals she is also expecting. Comedy sequel, starring Steve Martin and Diane Keaton.

Turner & Hooch (1989) E4 2:30pm-4:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A Californian detective investigating the murder of a local man by drug smugglers has only one witness to help him solve the case – the large, smelly dog that belonged to the victim, which is about to turn the detective’s well-ordered existence into chaos. Family comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Mare Winningham and Craig T Nelson.

The Incredible Hulk (2008) ITV 3:20pm-5:25pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A bungled experiment causes a scientist to turn into a monster whenever he gets angry. He travels the world seeking a cure for his condition, while a ruthless general is determined to capture him and use the creature as a weapon. However, one of the soldiers under the officer’s command undergoes a terrifying transformation of his own. Comic-book adventure, starring Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth and William Hurt.

Hulk Merchandise

Big (1988) Film4 4:35pm-6:40pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A boy ridiculed for his size makes a wish on a fairground machine to become bigger – only to wake up as a 30-year-old man. Driven from his home by his terrified mother, the bewildered youngster trapped in a grown-up body makes his way to New York, where he rises high in the ranks of a toy manufacturing company and applies his youthful enthusiasm to the complexities of adult life. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins and Robert Loggia.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) Channel 4 8:00pm-11:00pm (3 hours)
The heroic autobots discover that a spaceship from their own planet crashed into the moon decades ago, carrying their former leader and an incredibly powerful device. They must fight to defend the human race as their enemies the decepticons plot to use this machine to rebuild their own world and destroy the Earth. Sci-fi adventure sequel, with Shia LaBeouf, Josh Duhamel and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

Transformers Clothing

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, don’t forget to print your tickets (if you have to) and to put the lid back on the toothpaste. No…really!
xoxo

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Mop our brow and pour us a drink! It’s only another sunny retro movie weekend!

Like an over excited weekender heading to the nearest beach , we find ourselves faced with another few days of adventure, comedy and perhaps a bit or romance as we set up base in the sand for another retro movie extravaganza! With sandy sandwiches and our trusty bucket and spade, we’ll wind away the sunny afternoon with the gentle breeze and sound of the crashing waves. With more layers of sun cream on than there are layers on a gob stopper, we’ll soak up some Sun before dashing the the ice cream van to grab more treats than we know we probably should. Good times.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 28th May

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Murder on the Orient Express (1974) ITV 1:15pm-3:50pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
An American businessman travelling on the Orient Express from Istanbul to Paris tries to hire Hercule Poirot to discover the source of the death threats that have been made against him. The sleuth refuses, but wakes up the following morning to learn the man has been stabbed to death while the train was held up by heavy snow – and there is no shortage of suspects among the passengers. Agatha Christie mystery,

Short Circuit 2 (1988) Sony Channel 2:30pm-4:45pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Manic mechanoid Johnny Five meets an old friend in New York City and embarks on a fact-finding tour – but ends up entangled in a series of escapades culminating in a bank robbery. Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Fisher Stevens, Michael McKean, Cynthia Gibb and Jack Weston, with the voice of Tim Blaney.

Mannequin (1987) 5STAR 3:10pm-5:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A struggling artist gets a job as a window dresser for a department store, only to discover one of his dummies is a reincarnated Egyptian princess who comes to life at night. As he falls for the living doll, she inspires him to transform the shop’s display and make it the most spectacular in town. Fantasy comedy, starring Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall.

Fun Fact: Director Michael Gottlieb got the idea for this film when he was walking by a store window and was startled to “see” a mannequin move by itself. He realized it was just an optical illusion caused by a combination of lights and shadows, but began to wonder what would happen if a mannequin actually DID come to life.

Uncle Buck (1989) ITV2 3:20pm-4:20pm (1 hour) 2 parts
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

Sister Act (1992) Film4 4:50pm-6:50pm (2 hours)
Nightclub singer Deloris Van Cartier agrees to testify against her gangster boyfriend after witnessing a murder. Placed in protective custody by the authorities, she is less than pleased to discover she is expected to pose as chaste nun Sister Mary Clarence in a convent. Comedy, starring Whoopi Goldberg, Harvey Keitel, Maggie Smith, Bill Nunn and Kathy Najimy.

The Animal (2001) Comedy Central 6:05pm-7:40pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A man dreams of becoming a police officer, but thinks his chance is lost after a car accident leaves him critically injured. That is, until a deranged scientist offers to rebuild him with the body parts and organs of various animals, making his physique better than ever before. All seems well, until some beastly traits begin to emerge. Comedy, with Rob Schneider, Edward Asner and Colleen Haskell.

Hulk (2003) ITV 7:15pm-8:25pm (1 hour 10 minutes)
Scientist Dr Bruce Banner turns into the rampaging green Hulk after exposure to a huge dose of gamma radiation, prompting the military to embark on a no-holds-barred mission to destroy the monster. Meanwhile, Banner’s unstable father resurfaces, holding the secret to his transformation. Comic-strip adventure from director Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott and Nick Nolte.

Hulk Merchandise

The Prestige (2006) BBC2 11:00pm-1:00am (2 hours)
Victorian stage illusionists Robert Angier and Alfred Borden engage in a bitter personal and professional rivalry. The pair resort to increasingly brutal measures to sabotage each other’s acts, while Angier becomes obsessed with the secret behind Borden’s greatest illusion. Christopher Nolan’s mystery thriller, starring Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Piper Perabo and Scarlett Johansson, with David Bowie as real-life scientific pioneer Nikola Tesla.

End of Days (1999) Channel 4 11:10pm-1:30am (2 hours 20 minutes)
A world-weary former police officer encounters the Devil himself on New Year’s Eve 1999, and is spurred into action to stop the Prince of Darkness exploiting an innocent woman to bring about Armageddon. Supernatural thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gabriel Byrne, Robin Tunney, Rod Steiger, Kevin Pollak, CCH Pounder and Miriam Margolyes.

SUNDAY 29th May

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Beethoven (1992) ITV2 1:50pm-2:50pm (1 hour) 2 parts
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.

Doc Hollywood (1991) ITV3 4:30pm-5:40pm (1 hour 10 minutes)
An arrogant doctor on his way to California causes an accident in a rural South Carolina town and is sentenced to community service at the local hospital. Initially desperate to leave, he gradually comes to appreciate a slower pace of life. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, Julie Warner, Woody Harrelson, Bridget Fonda and George Hamilton.

Fun Fact: At one point Hank Gordon says, “I don’t trust a man who doesn’t eat meat.” In real life, Woody Harrelson is a vegan.

Despicable Me (2010) ITV2 5:20pm-6:20pm (1 hour) 2 parts
A criminal mastermind hopes to seal his reputation as the greatest villain of them all by stealing the moon. First he needs to get his hands on a shrinking ray owned by a rival evil genius, and adopts three orphan girls to help him – but finds that fatherhood brings out his long-buried caring side. Animated comedy, with the voices of Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand and Julie Andrews.

Despicable Me Merchandise

Big (1988) Film4 4:50pm-6:55pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A boy ridiculed for his size makes a wish on a fairground machine to become bigger – only to wake up as a 30-year-old man. Driven from his home by his terrified mother, the bewildered youngster trapped in a grown-up body makes his way to New York, where he rises high in the ranks of a toy manufacturing company and applies his youthful enthusiasm to the complexities of adult life. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins and Robert Loggia.

Field of Dreams (1989) Film4 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A farmer hears a mysterious voice inspiring him to mark out a baseball diamond in a cornfield – which, to his surprise, is visited by the ghost of the star player of the 1919 Chicago White Sox team, whose career was cut short by scandal. It later dawns on him the pitch has a greater purpose – to give people who have sacrificed important parts of their lives a second chance. Fantasy, starring Kevin Costner, Ray Liotta, Burt Lancaster and James Earl Jones.

Police Academy (1984) ITV4 9:00pm-10:00pm (1 hour) 2 parts
An American police college lowers its entrance requirements in the hope of attracting new recruits, and in response, assorted dubious candidates turn up for enrolment. A short-tempered instructor is determined to weed out the bad apples, but a riot provides the clueless cops with a chance to prove their worth. Comedy, starring Steve Guttenberg, Kim Cattrall, Bubba Smith and GW Bailey.

Good Will Hunting (1997) ITV3 10:05pm-11:10pm (1 hour 5 minutes) 2 parts
A troubled maths genius refuses to use his gift, preferring to work as a janitor and lead a normal life with his friends. Eventually, a university professor persuades him to see a psychologist, who befriends him and proves the only person able to help him come to terms with his talent and past traumas. Drama, written by and starring Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, who won Oscars for their screenplay. With Robin Williams, Minnie Driver and Stellan Skarsgard.

Whatever you’re up to this long retro weekend, make sure you have an outside towel and an inside towel and don’t forget to bring enough socks. Matching optional.
xoxo

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Slap my thigh and shiver me timbers! It’s another retro movie filled weekend!

Like a very keen and mildly experienced racer, we find ourselves faced with a a packed grid in which to take on. We’ll rev up the car and our adrenaline as we speed our way round the twist and turns of the track hunting down our next victim to overtake. Ticking off places like movies in our weekend, we’ll use cunning and tactics to manoeuvre our way through the weekend as we gain a sense of victory with every pass. Taking poll position, we’ll stand proud on the podium gazing back at the weekend that was.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 21st May

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The Dark Crystal
(1982) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
A survivor of a near-extinct race is given a dangerous quest as his world approaches an astronomical event that will decide its future. He must find a way to restore a broken piece to a magical crystal, which has become a source of dark power for the cruel creatures who wiped out his people. Jim Henson’s puppet fantasy, with the voices of Stephen Garlick and Billie Whitelaw.

The Likely Lads (1976) GOLD 12:35pm-2:25pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Bob and Thelma embark on a chaotic caravan holiday – with best pal Terry and a glamorous Scandinavian au pair in tow, ensuring that nothing will go according to plan. Comedy based on the TV series, starring James Bolam, Rodney Bewes, Brigit Forsyth and Mary Tamm.

Hulk (2003) ITV 2:20pm-4:55pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
Scientist Dr Bruce Banner turns into the rampaging green Hulk after exposure to a huge dose of gamma radiation, prompting the military to embark on a no-holds-barred mission to destroy the monster. Meanwhile, Banner’s unstable father resurfaces, holding the secret to his transformation. Comic-strip adventure from director Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott and Nick Nolte.

Hulk Merchandise

Back to the Future (1985) ITV2 5:05pm-6:05pm (1 hour) 2 part
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.

Back to the Future TShirts

Tootsie (1982) Film4 6:40pm-9:00pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A New York actor’s difficult reputation has rendered him unemployable. When a TV soap advertises a new female role, he disguises himself as a woman for the audition – and wins the part. But the character proves so popular, he is forced to keep up the pretence indefinitely. Comedy, starring Dustin Hoffman, Jessica Lange and Bill Murray. Directed by Sydney Pollack, who makes a cameo appearance as Hoffman’s agent.

Casino Royale (1967) 7:00pm-8:10pm (1 hour 10 minutes) 2 part
Ageing spy James Bond comes out of retirement to tackle a mysterious mastermind who wants to take over the world. Meanwhile, another agent disguises himself as Bond to face the evil genius over the baccarat table. Spoof spy adventure, starring David Niven, Peter Sellers, Woody Allen, Orson Welles, Deborah Kerr and Ursula Andress.

James Bond Merchandise

Uncle Buck (1989) ITV2 7:20pm-8:20pm (1 hour) 2 part
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

SUNDAY 22nd May

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A Little Princess
(1995) ITV2 1:00pm-2:05pm (1 hour 5 minutes)
A wealthy English girl is sent to an austere New York boarding school, where she charms the other youngsters with her stories of life in India – until her father goes missing in action, leaving her destitute and in the hands of the wicked headmistress. Drama based on Frances Hodgson Burnett’s classic novel, with Eleanor Bron, Liesel Matthews and Liam Cunningham.

Mars Attacks! (1996) Comedy Central 2:00pm-4:00pm (2 hours)
The inhabitants of Earth leap into action to repel an impending invasion by a seemingly invincible Martian army, which possesses superior weaponry, a thirst for destruction and a wicked sense of humour. Tim Burton’s sci-fi comedy, starring Jack Nicholson, Glenn Close, Pierce Brosnan, Annette Bening, Natalie Portman, Danny DeVito and Tom Jones.

Evolution (2001) Channel 4 2:30pm-4:30pm (2 hours)
Two science teachers investigate a mysterious meteor and discover it is oozing a strange fluid containing millions of minuscule but rapidly evolving organisms – which start to turn into terrifying alien monsters with a taste for human flesh. Sci-fi comedy, starring David Duchovny, Orlando Jones, Julianne Moore, Seann William Scott, Dan Aykroyd and Ted Levine.

Ghost (1990) More4 9:00pm-11:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
The spirit of a murdered executive tries to find a way to help his girlfriend bring his killer to justice and enlists the aid of a fraudulent medium – who is amazed and baffled when her psychic powers turn out to be all too real. Romantic fantasy, starring Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore, Tony Goldwyn and an Oscar-winning Whoopi Goldberg.

Starsky & Hutch (2004) Comedy Central 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
Two mismatched detectives are forced to work together for the first time to track down a crime kingpin who has introduced a new, undetectable narcotic to the streets – but they struggle to get along. Comedy spoofing the 1970s cop show, starring Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Snoop Dogg, Vince Vaughn and Juliette Lewis.

Raw Deal (1986) ITV4 10:00pm-11:00pm (1 hour) 2 part
An FBI agent is discharged for insubordination after assaulting a suspect, and ends up reduced to being the sheriff of a backwater Southern town. He is later offered his old job back – on the condition he will infiltrate a gang of Chicago mobsters and bring their leader to justice for killing the son of the Bureau’s chief. Action thriller, with Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sam Wanamaker, Kathryn Harrold, Ed Lauter and Darren McGavin.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, always keep your legs and arms inside the kart and remember to take the original out of the copier.

xoxo

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