John Candy

Grow bags and watering cans! Another retro movie weekend is here and boy is it a beauty!

Ripping open the top of our little bag of brown, earthy growing gold…. we’ll pick out the finest seeds in the pack to plunge down into the soft wet soil. Watering just the perfect amount and giving them all the sun our current weather can afford, we’ll wait patiently for untold growing glory to begin. Within just a few weeks, we can see signs of the impending deliciousness which sends our excitement rising with every new shoot that appears. Will we have created vegetable magic? Or will we have nothing more than a few small lumps of starchy matter… only time will tell.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 12th August

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Dr Dolittle 2
(2001) Film4 2:40pm-4:20pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
The vet with a talent for talking to animals comes to the aid of forest creatures that need his help protecting their homes from land developers. He also has to deal with the love life of a circus bear that has fallen for a wild female. Comedy sequel, starring Eddie Murphy and Kevin Pollak, with the voices of Steve Zahn, Lisa Kudrow and Isaac Hayes.

Uncle Buck (1989) ITV 3:10pm-5:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

Liar Liar (1997) ITV2 4:15pm-5:55pm
A lawyer, whose underhand ploys to win cases leave him little time to see his son, discovers he is incapable of lying after the boy’s birthday wish makes his dad tell only the truth. However, this causes a host of problems as the attorney tries to muddle his way through a high-profile divorce settlement. Comedy, with Jim Carrey, Maura Tierney, Justin Cooper, Jennifer Tilly and Cary Elwes.

Look Who’s Talking (1989) 5STAR 5:25pm-7:20pm
Pregnant Mollie is dumped by her boyfriend, and sets out after the baby’s birth to find a surrogate father for her infant son Mikey, who comments on proceedings through a wisecracking inner monologue. Mikey is confident the cab driver who helped deliver him is the perfect man for the job – but his mother is less than convinced. Comedy, with John Travolta, Kirstie Alley and the voice of Bruce Willis.

Fun Fact: Amy Heckerling was inspired to write the film after her husband and writer Neal Israel started playfully talking in a different voice to pretend what their new baby would say.

The American President (1995) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:25pm (1 hour 25 minutes)
The US president embarks on a relationship with an environmental lobbyist – but his delighted opponents jump at the chance to drag the pair through the gutter press, putting their romance and his career in jeopardy. Rob Reiner’s political comedy, starring Michael Douglas, Annette Bening, Martin Sheen, Richard Dreyfuss and Michael J Fox.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who S*****d Me (1999) Dave 10:00pm-12:00am (2 hours)
The sex-mad spy is sent back to swinging London at the height of the 1960s in pursuit of the dastardly Dr Evil, who has stolen the secret agent’s `mojo’. Teaming up with a female American agent, Austin must stop his arch-rival from causing havoc with a doomsday weapon on the moon. Comedy sequel, starring Mike Myers in multiple roles alongside Heather Graham, Rob Lowe, Robert Wagner, Michael York, Seth Green and Verne Troyer.

Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) ITV 10:45pm-1:00am (2 hours 15 minutes)
James Bond joins forces with a Chinese agent to foil a media mogul’s scheme to start a war between their countries. Using an undetectable stealth ship, the press baron plans an attack on both nations’ navies, knowing they will blame each other – giving him exclusive global media coverage of the resulting conflict. Spy adventure, starring Pierce Brosnan, Jonathan Pryce, Teri Hatcher and Michelle Yeoh.

James Bond TShirts

Lock Up (1989) ITV4 11:00pm-1:15am
A convict is transferred to a maximum security prison, where he falls foul of a sadistic warden with a grudge against him – and who abuses his position of power to make the inmate’s life a misery and destroy his good relationship with the guards. Thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Donald Sutherland, Darlanne Fluegel and Tom Sizemore.

SUNDAY 13th August

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Thunderbirds Are Go! (1966) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
International Rescue is called in to save the first manned space mission to Mars from sinister hijacker The Hood, and ensure a second attempt goes to plan. Puppet adventure based on Gerry Anderson’s TV series, featuring the voices of Shane Rimmer, Ray Barrett, Alexander Davion, Peter Dyneley, Sylvia Anderson and Cliff Richard, voicing a puppet version of himself.

Picture Perfect (1997) Film4 1:00pm-3:00pm (2 hours)
An ambitious executive hires a man to pose as her fiance to give her a stable image at work and attract a colleague who is only tempted by unavailable women. However, her fantasy life soon spirals out of control, leaving her unable to tell the difference between fact and fiction. Romantic comedy, with Jennifer Aniston, Jay Mohr, Kevin Bacon, Olympia Dukakis and Illeana Douglas.

Fun Fact: Turns out Matthew Broderick, Jon Stewart, John Corbett, and William Baldwin all screentested for the role of Nick.

Volcano (1997) Channel 4 2:30pm-4:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A river of molten lava spews from an erupting volcano onto the streets of Los Angeles, prompting the head of a crisis agency to team up with an intrepid scientist in a frantic and dangerous bid to save the city’s residents. Disaster thriller, starring Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, Gaby Hoffmann, Keith David and Don Cheadle.

See No Evil, Hear No Evil (1989) Sony Movie Channel 4:35pm-6:50pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A blind man and his deaf friend go on the run to clear themselves of a trumped-up murder charge. However, all kinds of oddball characters are on their trail, determined to get hold of a top-secret microchip that the duo do not realise they have. Comedy, starring Richard Pryor, Gene Wilder, Kevin Spacey, Joan Severance, Alan North and Anthony Zerbe.

The Fifth Element (1997) 5STAR 7:25pm-10:00pm
In the 23rd century, the world faces destruction from a seemingly unstoppable force of pure evil. Meanwhile, a New York cab driver encounters a mysterious woman destined to save the Earth from its fate, and has to protect her from a scheming arms dealer and a horde of alien mercenaries. Luc Besson’s sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis, Milla Jovovich and Gary Oldman.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010) ITV 7:30pm-10:15pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
The dark lord Voldemort rises to ultimate power over the magical world, so the teenage wizard and his friends set out on a mission to find the magical horcruxes – artefacts containing parts of the evil wizard’s soul that hold the key to destroying him. The first half of the two-part conclusion to the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Ralph Fiennes, Emma Watson and Rupert Grint.

Harry Potter Deathly Hallows Merchandise

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, be prepared and remember to stop, look around and really take note of the situation, you might see more than you knew was there.

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Great pit of fire! A retro movie weekend is here and ready to rock our world!

Firing up the trusty BBQ for another adventure into culinary excellence, we find ourselves in charge of the heat and fury of a few hundred hot and angry coals. Releasing their built up energy in one almighty session, we’ll throw on what can only be described as a tasty plethora of food goodness and watch it spit, sizzle and crisp up in front of our eyes.  Flipping and spinning our way to cooked perfection, we’ll serve up our final work to the hungry mouths that have been patently waiting.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 24th June

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Clueless
(1995) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
A rich high-school student uses all her charm and financial clout to boost an awkward new pupil’s image, but soon finds she has created a monster – while her own popularity suffers in the process. Comedy inspired by Jane Austen’s Emma, starring Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy and Paul Rudd.

Clueless Merchandise

Splash (1984) BBC2 1:00pm-2:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A lonely New Yorker is rescued from drowning by a mermaid, who falls in love with him and assumes human form so she can seek him out in Manhattan. He is soon equally smitten, and she resolves to keep her true nature a secret from him. However, an obsessive scientist suspects the truth and plans to prove it. Romantic fantasy comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Daryl Hannah and John Candy.

Fun Fact: The scene at the racquetball court, where John Candy serves and the ball hits him in the head, was done in one take.

The Great Outdoors (1988) ITV4 1:45pm-3:30pm
Easy-going family man Chet Ripley takes his wife and two sons to a lakeside cabin in the wilderness to enjoy a peaceful holiday. However, his plans to relax are ruined by the unwelcome and unannounced arrival of his obnoxious brother-in-law – as well as unexpected intrusions by the local wildlife. Comedy, starring John Candy, Dan Aykroyd and Annette Bening.

Jaws 2 (1978) ITV4 9:05pm-11:25pm
The seaside resort of Amity is terrorised once again by a man-eating great white shark. While police chief Brody struggles to alert the townsfolk to the magnitude of the danger, a group of teenagers – including Brody’s two sons – is adrift at sea in waters hunted by the shark. Thriller sequel, starring Roy Scheider, Lorraine Gary and Murray Hamilton.

Jaws Clothing

Pulp Fiction (1994) Spike 10:00pm-1:00am (3 hours)
A series of interlinked stories about the Los Angeles underworld. A hitman plays minder to his boss’s wife, and he and his partner deal with a dead body following a mishap with a gun. Meanwhile, a washed-up boxer goes on the run after refusing to throw a fight, and two lovers plot a hold-up in a diner. Quentin Tarantino’s crime drama, starring John Travolta, Samuel L Jackson, Uma Thurman, Bruce Willis, Ving Rhames, Tim Roth and Amanda Plummer.

Pulp Fiction Gifts

Jaws 3 (1983) ITV4 11:25pm-1:30am
A shark is captured by divers and put on display in a Florida marine centre, where it ultimately dies. However, examination of the body reveals the seemingly fully-grown shark was actually a baby – and its enormous, ferocious mother soon comes looking for it. Thriller sequel, originally released in cinemas in 3D, starring Dennis Quaid, Simon MacCorkindale, Louis Gossett Jr and Bess Armstrong.

Jaws T-Shirts

SUNDAY 25th June

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Street Fighter
(1994) Sony Channel 11:00am-1:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A military officer goes in search of a power-mad general who is holding several hostages in a secret location. He soon finds he is not the only one on the maniac’s trail, and joins forced with a mismatched band of martial artists to save the captives. Action adventure based on the video game, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme, Raul Julia, Kylie Minogue and Ming-Na Wen.

Street Fighter TShirt

Beethoven’s 2nd (1993) ITV2 1:25pm-3:10pm
The slobbering St Bernard is now grown up and in love with his beautiful sweetheart Missy. Together they bring a litter of puppies into the world – but have to go on the defensive when Missy’s owner, the evil Regina, sets out to steal them for herself. Comedy sequel, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Chris Penn, Nicholle Tom and Christopher Castle.

Look Who’s Talking Too (1990) Sony Channel 3:30pm-5:15pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Wisecracking toddler Mikey is joined by mischievous baby sister Julie and sibling rivalry inevitably erupts – while their parents have problems of their own to deal with, in the shape of the kids’ good-for-nothing uncle. Comedy sequel, starring John Travolta and Kirstie Alley, with the voices of Bruce Willis and Rosanne Barr.

Fun Fact: The Learjet featured in the movie, was owned by John Travolta at the time the movie was made. Tail number N254JT. JT = John Travolta.

Mrs Doubtfire (1993) Film4 4:25pm-6:50pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A struggling actor’s ambitious, no-nonsense wife throws him out and demands a divorce. Desperate to spend time with his children, he puts his talents to good use by donning drag and posing as a Scottish housekeeper to get a job looking after them. Comedy, starring Robin Williams, Sally Field, Pierce Brosnan, Harvey Fierstein and Mara Wilson.

Flubber (1997) ITV2 5:00pm-6:50pm
A scatty professor is in financial trouble, and his only hope of avoiding disaster is to market his latest invention – a strange rubbery substance with a life of its own. However, a criminal gang is determined to get hold of his creation. Remake of 1961 Disney comedy The Absent-Minded Professor, with Robin Williams, Marcia Gay Harden, Christopher McDonald and Wil Wheaton.

The Full Monty (1997) GOLD 11:00pm-12:50am (1 hour 50 minutes)
Six unemployed men from Sheffield decide to become strippers for one night only in a bid to raise extra money. However, with no dancing experience and far from perfect physiques, the men rely on the unique selling point of complete nudity to impress the punters. Comedy, starring Robert Carlyle, Mark Addy, Tom Wilkinson, Hugo Speer and Paul Barber.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, don’t forget the sugar and always keep a napkin handy.

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Run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run!It’s time for another super special Retro Movie Rundown Easter Special!

Hopping and leaping our way around the TV schedule, we’ve sniffed out a whole hear of hidden retro movie eggs for you all to feast on this long weekend. Unwrapping each film like our Easter chocolatey goodness, we’ll take stock of our collection, before selecting only the biggest and best choices and devouring them in true ’tis but once a year style’.

Happy retro movie Easter weekend everyone!

FRIDAY 14th April

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The Phantom
(1996) Channel 4 10:00am-11:55am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A jungle-dwelling masked adventurer leaves his African home for New York in a bid to stop the power-crazed schemes of an evil industrialist. The tycoon is on the hunt for three legendary magical skulls, which can be combined to form the ultimate weapon. Superhero adventure, starring Billy Zane, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Treat Williams and Patrick McGoohan.

The Muppet Movie (1979) Film4 11:00am-12:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Kermit the frog is persuaded by his agent that he has a future in movies. He sets off on a journey across America to realise his dream, gathering a crowd of like-minded friends along the way – but the owner of a French restaurant plans to make him the dish of the day. Comedy, starring Dom DeLuise and Charles Durning alongside the puppet characters, with cameos from Mel Brooks, Orson Welles and Steve Martin.

The Muppets TShirts

Labyrinth (1986) 5STAR 11:05am-1:10pm
A teenager wishes her baby brother would be taken away, only to have her request granted by a band of goblins and their sinister king. She regrets her decision and sets out to rescue him, but to reach the castle where he is being held, she must find her way through a magical maze full of strange creatures. Jim Henson’s fantasy adventure, starring Jennifer Connelly and David Bowie.

Labyrinth Clothing

On the Buses (1971) ITV3 11:25am-1:15pm
Wily bus driver Stan Butler thinks a new company policy that allows women behind the wheel will rob him of his precious overtime money. Enlisting the aid of conductor Jack, he does everything he can to sabotage the plan. Comedy, based on the TV series, starring Reg Varney, Bob Grant, Stephen Lewis, Doris Hare, Peter Madden and Anna Karen.

The Great Muppet Caper (1981) Film4 12:55pm-3:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Reporters Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear are sacked for missing out on a massive scoop about the theft of jewellery from famous British fashion designer Lady Holiday. To try to re-establish their reputations, the duo and Gonzo fly to London to see if they can track down the culprit. Comedy, with the voices of Jim Henson and Frank Oz, with cameo appearances by John Cleese, Diana Rigg, Charles Grodin and Peter Ustinov.

The Muppets Merchandise

Jumanji (1995) Sony Channel 2:20pm-4:30pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A man who has been trapped inside a mysterious jungle board game for 26 years is eventually freed when two children start to play it. Unfortunately, he arrives with a rampaging horde of animals on his heels, leaving only one solution – to finish the game he started all those years ago. Fantasy adventure, starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst and Bonnie Hunt.

You’ve Got Mail (1998) 5STAR 4:05pm-6:30pm
Two rivals in the bookshop business fall in love over the internet, unaware they know and dislike each other in the real world. While things remain frosty in person, the pair’s anonymous online relationship continues to blossom. Romantic comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Greg Kinnear, Parker Posey and Dabney Coleman.

Muppet Treasure Island (1996) Film4 4:40pm-6:50pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A youngster finds a treasure map and joins an expedition searching for a famous buccaneer’s lost treasure on an unexplored island. However, their mission falls foul of a band of pirates hiding out among the crew. Musical comedy based on Robert Louis Stevenson’s novel, starring Tim Curry, Billy Connolly, Jennifer Saunders and Kevin Bishop alongside the puppet characters.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) GOLD 7:35pm-9:10pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Lethal Weapon 3 (1992) Dave 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Detectives Riggs and Murtaugh team up with a reformed small-time crook and a tough, female internal-affairs investigator to track down a former policeman trafficking impounded weaponry to the bosses of organised crime. Action thriller sequel, starring Mel Gibson, Danny Glover, Joe Pesci and Rene Russo.

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) GOLD 9:10pm-11:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The eccentric pet detective is coaxed out of self-imposed exile in a Buddhist monastery to visit Africa and help search for a sacred white bat. However, his unique investigative talents are tested to the limits as he faces a race against time to find the missing creature and prevent a tribal war. Comedy sequel, starring Jim Carrey, Simon Callow and Bob Gunton.

The Deer Hunter (1978) ITV4 11:20pm-1:30am
The lives of three American steelworkers and their families are torn apart in the wake of the Vietnam War. After enduring horrific treatment in a prison camp during the conflict, the three friends return to their homes but struggle to readjust to normal life. Oscar-winning drama, starring Robert De Niro, Christopher Walken, Meryl Streep, John Savage and John Cazale in his last film role.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) BBC1 11:45pm-1:20am (1 hour 35 minutes)
The chauvinistic host of a top-rated American news programme in 1970s San Diego fights for his status and job security when both are threatened by the arrival of an ambitious female reporter, whose determination to become a newsreader leads to a bitter battle of the sexes. Comedy, starring Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Fred Willard and Steve Carell.

SATURDAY 15th April

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The Flintstones
(1994) ITV 11:35am-1:20pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Blue-collar caveman Fred Flintstone is promoted to an executive position at work and unwittingly becomes embroiled in an embezzlement scheme – thanks in no small part to his seductive new assistant. Live-action version of the cartoon comedy, starring John Goodman, Rick Moranis, Rosie O’Donnell, Halle Berry and Elizabeth Taylor.

Matilda (1996) Sony Channel 12:00pm-2:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Roald Dahl Merchandise

Home Alone (1990) Film4 1:00pm-3:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O’Hara and John Candy.

Home Alone Merchandise

The Secret of My Success (1987) ITV 1:20pm-3:30pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A naive country boy travels to New York to make his fortune, only to end up working in a corporation’s mail room. He chances on a vacant office and hatches a plan to pass himself off as a top-ranking executive, but leading a double life proves harder than expected. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, Helen Slater, Richard Jordan and Fred Gwynne.

Bean (1997) ITV2 6:45pm-8:30pm
The hapless fool is employed as a security guard for a British art gallery and is sent to Los Angeles to bring back a famous painting. Unfortunately, he finds himself mistaken for a renowned art professor and invited to make an important presentation. Mel Smith’s British comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Burt Reynolds, Peter MacNicol, John Mills, Peter Capaldi and June Brown.

Clear and Present Danger (1994) ITV4 9:00pm-11:50pm
A CIA analyst gets caught up in the Colombian drug trade while trying to track down terrorists responsible for the murder of a close friend of the US president – but his investigations point to illegal activity and corruption at the very top of government. Action thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, with Harrison Ford reprising his role from Patriot Games alongside Willem Dafoe, Anne Archer and James Earl Jones.

SUNDAY 16th April

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Thunderball
(1965) ITV 12:00pm-2:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
James Bond travels to the Bahamas on the trail of two nuclear warheads stolen from a British aircraft. The lethal weapons have fallen into the hands of international crime syndicate Spectre, which plans to fire them at the US coast unless an exorbitant ransom is paid. Spy adventure, starring Sean Connery, Claudine Auger, Adolfo Celi and Lois Maxwell.

James Bond TShirts

Cool Runnings (1993) BBC1 2:15pm-3:50pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A sprinter fails to qualify for the Jamaican Olympic squad, but refuses to give up his dream. Learning that a former US bobsleigh coach is living nearby, he seizes the chance to shine in an entirely different sport, and cajoles three of his friends to join him in training for the 1988 Winter Olympics in the far less tropical environment of Canada. Fact-based comedy, with John Candy, Leon, Doug E Doug and Malik Yoba.

Oliver! (1968) Channel 5 5:20pm-8:00pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Oscar-winning musical version of the stage play based on Charles Dickens’ classic tale about a lonely workhouse orphan who ends up on the cold streets of London, where he falls under the wing of petty crook Fagin and his gang of young backstreet thieves. Featuring the iconic songs Food, Glorious Food, Consider Yourself, As Long as He Needs Me and You’ve Got to Pick a Pocket or Two. Starring Ron Moody, Mark Lester, Oliver Reed, Jack Wild, Harry Secombe, Shani Wallis and Leonard Rossiter.

Mission: Impossible 2 (2000) Film4 6:35pm-9:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Secret agent Ethan Hunt sent to find and destroy the only sample of a deadly man-made virus. However, he faces tough opposition in a former spy-turned-criminal mastermind who has already acquired the cure and now wants the pathogen itself. Director John Woo’s action thriller sequel, starring Tom Cruise, Dougray Scott, Thandie Newton and Anthony Hopkins.

Apocalypse Now (1979) Spike 9:00pm-12:00am (3 hours)
An army captain is sent on a top-secret mission into Cambodia, where his goal is to find and assassinate a renegade colonel who has gone insane and is worshipped by his followers as a god. However, as his patrol boat journeys further upriver, the conflict and disarray surrounding him becomes increasingly disturbing and nightmarish. Francis Ford Coppola’s Vietnam War drama, starring Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando and Robert Duvall.

The Dirty Dozen (1967) ITV4 9:05pm-12:10am
An uncompromising major is placed in charge of a seemingly suicidal mission to destroy a French chateau being used as a base by Nazi officers. Needing tough but expendable soldiers for the task, he recruits 12 hardened criminals from a military prison. Second World War action adventure, starring Lee Marvin, Telly Savalas, Ernest Borgnine, Charles Bronson and Donald Sutherland.

MONDAY 17th April

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Kingpin
(1996) Channel 4 1:00am-3:00am (2 hours)
A former 10-pin bowling champion prodigy turns conman and hits the bottle when an accident leads to the loss of his hand. To revive his flagging fortunes, he goes all out to persuade a gifted Amish man to take up the sport professionally so he can cash in on his prize-winnings. Comedy from the Farrelly brothers, starring Woody Harrelson, Randy Quaid, Vanessa Angel and Bill Murray.

Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989) Film4 11:00am-12:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A professor invents a ray with the power to reduce objects in size. Unfortunately, his kids and their meddling friends activate it and are shrunk to microscopic proportions. When they are accidentally thrown out with the rubbish, the children have to contend with all kinds of animals and insects on their journey home across the backyard. Disney comedy, with Rick Moranis, Marcia Strassman and Amy O’Neill.

Patch Adams (1998) Sony Channel 1:15pm-3:45pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
A talented student doctor turns the medical community upside down with his offbeat views about the healing power of laughter. His methods provoke outrage and intense debate among his professors – but his extrovert nature brightens the lives of all kinds of patients. Comedy drama, starring Robin Williams, Monica Potter, Daniel London, Bob Gunton and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Coming to America (1988) GOLD 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A bored African prince defies his father’s plans for an arranged marriage and escapes to the USA to find a bride on his own terms. Comedy, starring Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall in several roles, with James Earl Jones, Allison Dean, Eriq La Salle and Madge Sinclair.

Whatever you’re up to this loooong weekend, happy hunting and have a barrel full of fun!

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Cheese and pineapple! Another retro movie weekend has sneaked up upon us and here here to shake things up!

With our bags looking fit to burst, we find ourselves once again taking on the challenge that is…. the pick n mix. With a set price, our only limitations are our own imagination on ways to cram more sweet and colourful goodness into our receptacle of choice. Another sprinkle of these, the odd one of them… we’ll push, pinch and cram our way to glory before, somehow securing the lid which sole purpose will be to remain in situ for the time it takes to pay for our gains and leave. Will we make it?

SATURDAY 11th MARCH

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Casper (1995) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
A paranormal expert moves into a haunted house where his daughter befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy – but things start to go awry when three smelly spooks and two dastardly crooks try to chase the new residents away. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci, Bill Pullman, Eric Idle, Cathy Moriarty and featuring the voice of Malachi Pearson.

The Great Outdoors (1988) ITV4 4:00pm-5:45pm
Easy-going family man Chet Ripley takes his wife and two sons to a lakeside cabin in the wilderness to enjoy a peaceful holiday. However, his plans to relax are ruined by the unwelcome and unannounced arrival of his obnoxious brother-in-law – as well as unexpected intrusions by the local wildlife. Comedy, starring John Candy, Dan Aykroyd and Annette Bening.

A Knight’s Tale (2001) 5Star 4:40pm-7:20pm
A poverty-stricken squire spies an opportunity to make his dreams come true when his employer dies. He takes his place as a knight, launching himself on the road to riches by competing in jousting tournaments, but his ruse is jeopardised by a dastardly nobleman. Comedy adventure, starring Heath Ledger, Paul Bettany, Mark Addy, Shannyn Sossamon and Rufus Sewell.

LA Confidential (1997) BBC2 10:45pm-12:55am (2 hours 10 minutes)
Three cops – an ambitious rookie, a hard-boiled veteran and a smooth character more interested in celebrity than justice – investigate a corpse-strewn bloodbath in a diner. However, the ensuing search for the perpetrators reveals a trail of crime and corruption in the police force. Thriller set in 1950s Hollywood, with Russell Crowe, Guy Pearce, Kevin Spacey, James Cromwell, Danny DeVito and an Oscar-winning Kim Basinger.

Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985) ITV 11:00pm-12:50am (1 hour 50 minutes)
Incarcerated Special Forces veteran John Rambo is offered the chance for freedom by former commander Colonel Trautman if he takes up the offer to return to the jungles of Vietnam on a life-or-death mission to rescue American PoWs. During the course of the operation, he develops strong feelings for his guide, a female freedom fighter – but tragedy strikes, leaving him more determined than ever to exact a bloody and explosive revenge. Action adventure sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Julia Nickson-Soul, Steven Berkoff, George Kee Cheung, Andy Wood and Martin Kove.

Fun Fact: The only film in the Rambo series to be nominated for an Oscar.

SUNDAY 12th MARCH

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King Kong (1976) Film4 2:45pm-5:25pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Oil prospectors travel to a recently discovered and remote Pacific island, where they encounter a gigantic gorilla. The men manage to capture the huge ape and bring it back to America – but the confused creature is terrified by events and escapes, wreaking havoc in New York. Remake of the classic 1933 fantasy adventure, with Jeff Bridges, Jessica Lange and Charles Grodin.

Fun Fact: When producer Dino De Laurentiis walked into the studio to see the giant King Kong hand for the first time, the arm extended in his direction…. then the middle finger slowly uncurled and extended itself at him. It then broke and remained frozen, finger up, for a week.

Mr Bean’s Holiday (2007) ITV2 7:15pm-9:00pm
The bumbling fool wins first prize in the church raffle – a trip to France and a video camera. His travels cause chaos as he disrupts a film shoot in Cannes, to the fury of its megalomaniac director, and is then accused of kidnapping a youngster. Comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Willem Dafoe, Emma de Caunes and Max Baldry.

Sleepy Hollow (1999) E4 10:00pm-12:05am (2 hours 5 minutes)
A sceptical 18th-century detective is sent to a small hamlet supposedly terrorised by a demonic headless horseman who decapitates his victims. The investigator refuses to believe in the supernatural, convinced a human killer is behind the murders – but the legend proves to be all too true. Tim Burton’s gothic horror, starring Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson and Christopher Walken.

Lock Up (1989) ITV4 11:15pm-1:30am
A convict is transferred to a maximum security prison, where he falls foul of a sadistic warden with a grudge against him – and who abuses his position of power to make the inmate’s life a misery and destroy his good relationship with the guards. Thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Donald Sutherland, Darlanne Fluegel and Tom Sizemore.

Fun Fact: Chuck Wepner, the real-life inspiration for Rocky (1976), was an inmate at the prison where the film was shot. Sylvester Stallone greeted Wepner and told the other inmates that Wepner was “the real Rocky”.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember that you’ll never be as young and potentially as capable as you are right now. Embrace it!

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Print, pick and pack! Another retro movie weekend is here!

Just like one of the unsung heroes of the modern world, we find ourselves walking among the humble warehouse workers through the long isles of a bustling building. We’ll swoop, bend, stretch and clamber our way to reach all the exciting goodies that will soon be swiftly working their way to their new home where the eager new owner awaits with anticipation. Clip, clap, zip, the package is ready to begin its journey to far and distant lands as we begin all over again.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 5th NOVEMBER

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Casper
(1995) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
A paranormal expert moves into a haunted house where his daughter befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy – but things start to go awry when three smelly spooks and two dastardly crooks try to chase the new residents away. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci, Bill Pullman, Eric Idle, Cathy Moriarty and featuring the voice of Malachi Pearson.

Fun Fact: During the filming Christina Ricci and Bill Pullman had to talk to tennis balls in place of the ghosts while the digital ghost were added later on.

Dunston Checks In (1996) E4 12:00pm-1:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A gentleman jewel thief’s pet orang-utan runs amok in a swanky hotel, causing endless problems for the put-upon manager who has enough on his plate trying to ensure the establishment successfully attains a six-star rating. Family comedy, starring Jason Alexander, Rupert Everett, Faye Dunaway, Eric Lloyd and Paul Reubens.

Hercules (1997) 5STAR 3:20pm-5:10pm
The son of Zeus, king of the Greek gods, is sent to Earth to be raised as a human. When he learns of his immortal heritage, he discovers he can only reclaim his position among the gods by becoming a true hero, so he embarks on a series of adventures and battles fearsome monsters to prove his worth. Disney animated adventure, with the voices of Tate Donovan, Danny DeVito, James Woods and Rip Torn.

Disney Merchandise

Home Alone (1990) Film4 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O’Hara and John Candy.

Home Alone Clothing

Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal Sweater Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal T-Shirt

Glory (1989) BBC2 10:00pm-11:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Fact-based historical drama chronicling the story of the first all-black regiment to fight in the American Civil War, and the inexperienced officer given the job of training the men and leading them into battle. Starring Matthew Broderick, Cary Elwes, Morgan Freeman and Denzel Washington, who received an Oscar for his performance.

Carry On Screaming (1966) ITV 11:00pm-12:50am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A sinister boffin, his sultry sister and two genetic misfits kidnap innocent women from spooky Hocomb Woods and turn them into mannequins – but two dim-witted detectives look set to throw a spanner in the works. Comedy horror, starring Kenneth Williams, Fenella Fielding, Harry H Corbett, Charles Hawtrey, Jim Dale, Joan Sims and Bernard Bresslaw.

Fun Fact: Was one of the biggest and most popular films in 1966, the year the film was released. It is also one of the best selling ‘Carry on’ movies ever made. It’s a classic!

SUNDAY 6th NOVEMBER

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Hocus Pocus
(1993) Film4 2:50pm-4:50pm (2 hours)
A teenager in Salem, Massachusetts, breaks into a spooky house on Halloween and accidentally resurrects three witches who have been dead for 300 years. The sorceresses are soon causing chaos while seeking a suitable sacrifice for a ritual to give them eternal youth. However, an old foe – a boy they turned into a cat – is on hand to help stop their mischief. Supernatural Disney comedy, with Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, Kathy Najimy and Omri Katz.

Brewster’s Millions (1985) Film4 4:50pm-6:55pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A baseball player is stunned to learn he has come into a massive inheritance. Unfortunately, there is one condition – he must somehow find a way to spend $30million in just one month, or he will lose the lot. Meanwhile, two scheming lawyers, who stand to get the money if he fails, are determined to sabotage his efforts. Comedy, starring Richard Pryor, John Candy, Lonette McKee and Jerry Orbach.

Wayne’s World (1992) Comedy Central 6:00pm-8:00pm (2 hours)
Two heavy-metal fans broadcast an amateur TV programme from their basement. A slimy network executive offers them the chance to turn professional, but as they enjoy the perks of wealth and fame, they find their show being ruined by corporate interference. Comedy, starring Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Rob Lowe, Tia Carrere and Lara Flynn Boyle, with a cameo by Alice Cooper.

Dead Poets Society (1989) BBC2 11:15pm-1:20am (2 hours 5 minutes)
A charismatic English teacher at a New England prep school in the 1950s raises eyebrows among his strait-laced colleagues by encouraging the students to live life beyond their expectations. Unfortunately, the boys find their families and the rest of the teaching staff are not so understanding about their desire to follow their dreams. Peter Weir’s drama, starring Robin Williams, Robert Sean Leonard, Ethan Hawke, Josh Charles and Gale Hansen.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, keep it cool, keep it fun and keep it going!

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Chicken in a basket! It’s another retro movie filled weekend again? So soon? But how the….?

Like a super keen runner who has been in the depths of a training routine for longer than they can remember, we find ourselves just days away from our goal….the next local 10k run. We’ve worked hard, been rained on, and blown from left to right by the great British Spring weather and now it’s the real challenge. Will we beat our previous efforts? Will we be overtaken again by the IT guy who thought training was only something that happened on the railways? Only time, will tell.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 14th May

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City of Angels
(1998) ITV3 8:50am-9:50am (1 hour) 2 parts
A lonely angel observing life on Earth watches over a man undergoing heart surgery and is moved by the surgeon’s anguish at failing to save her patient. He makes himself visible to her and a mutual attraction develops – but it can only become a full-blown romance if he sacrifices his immortality. Romantic fantasy remake of Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire, starring Nicolas Cage, Meg Ryan and Dennis Franz.

A Walk in the Sun (1945) BBC2 8:15am-10:10am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A US Army infantry patrol joins the 1943 invasion of Italy, and a series of casualties leaves a corporal in charge of the men. They are selected for a special mission to seize a farmhouse that German forces have turned into a fortified hideout. Second World War adventure, starring Dana Andrews, Richard Conte and Sterling Holloway.

The ‘Burbs (1989) 5STAR 11:30am-1:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and Henry Gibson.

The Karate Kid Part III (1989) Comedy Central 3:00pm-5:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
The teenage martial arts expert becomes obsessed with defending his championship title, but wise mentor Mr Miyagi is not prepared to help him fight for such a shallow goal. Seeking someone else to help guide his career, he falls under the influence of a crooked trainer – who is secretly plotting his downfall with the help of an old adversary. Adventure sequel, starring Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita.

Karate Kid TShirts

Blues Brothers 2000 (1998) ITV4 3:15pm-4:20pm (1 hour 5 minutes) 2 parts
Ex-convict Elwood Blues sets about re-forming his band to raise funds for a children’s hospital. But no sooner has he found a suitable lead singer to replace his late brother Jake, than the band end up being pursued by the police, the Russian mafia and his own embittered stepbrother. Comedy sequel, starring Dan Aykroyd, John Goodman and Joe Morton.

The Dark Crystal (1982) Film4 4:40pm-6:25pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A survivor of a near-extinct race is given a dangerous quest as his world approaches an astronomical event that will decide its future. He must find a way to restore a broken piece to a magical crystal, which has become a source of dark power for the cruel creatures who wiped out his people. Jim Henson’s puppet fantasy, with the voices of Stephen Garlick and Billie Whitelaw.

Diamonds Are Forever (1971) ITV4 5:45pm-7:00pm (1 hour 15 minutes) 2 parts
James Bond investigates a diamond-smuggling operation, and discovers that behind the scheme is his insidious arch-enemy Blofeld, who is planning to construct a devastating orbital doomsday weapon powered by the precious stones, which will force world powers to disarm and give him global domination. Spy adventure, starring Sean Connery, Jill St John, Charles Gray, Bernard Lee and Lois Maxwell.

James Bond Merchandise

Back to the Future (1985) ITV2 6:55pm-7:55pm (1 hour)
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.

Back To The Future Merchandise

Zoolander (2001) 5STAR 10:00pm-11:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Dim male model Derek Zoolander is stunned to find his career going downhill thanks to the arrival of an equally vacuous rival – but fails to realise he is merely a pawn in a dangerous game of international espionage and world domination. Comedy, starring Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Will Ferrell, Milla Jovovich, Christine Taylor and David Duchovny.

The Dark Knight (2008) ITV 10:20pm-1:00am (2 hours 40 minutes)
In the sequel to Batman Begins, the masked hero finds a new ally in his war on organised crime in Gotham’s crusading new district attorney, Harvey Dent. However, both men are pushed to their limits by the rise of the Joker, a criminal mastermind spreading chaos and destruction throughout the city for his own amusement. Comic-book thriller, starring Christian Bale, Aaron Eckhart and an Oscar-winning Heath Ledger.

Batman Merchandise

SUNDAY 15th May

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Casper
(1995) Film4 1:00pm-3:00pm (2 hours)
A paranormal expert moves into a haunted house where his daughter befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy – but things start to go awry when three smelly spooks and two dastardly crooks try to chase the new residents away. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci, Bill Pullman, Eric Idle, Cathy Moriarty and featuring the voice of Malachi Pearson.

Death of a Gunfighter (1969) ITV4 2:25pm-3:25pm (1 hour)
A frontier marshal kills a drunken man in self defence, but finds his uncompromising brand of justice is no longer condoned by the locals. When he refuses to step down, the town fathers realise they may have to use violent methods of their own to rid themselves of him. Western, starring Richard Widmark, Lena Horne, Carroll O’Connor and David Opatoshu.

Porridge (1979) Film4 3:00pm-4:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Cellmates Fletcher and Godber are coerced into aiding an escape attempt organised by the sinister Grouty. However, the two jailbirds contrive to break back into prison before their absence is detected by the formidable Mr Mackay. Comedy based on the TV series, starring Ronnie Barker, Richard Beckinsale, Peter Vaughan, Fulton Mackay and Brian Wilde.

Pocahontas (1995) Channel 4 3:35pm-5:10pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A Native American princess falls in love with an English settler, but her father is distrustful of the Europeans – not without just cause, as a cruel governor is prepared to wage war to get his hands on the gold he believes they are hiding. Disney animated drama, with the voices of Irene Bedard, Mel Gibson and Christian Bale.

Uncle Buck (1989) ITV 4:00pm-6:00pm (2 hours)
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

X-Men (2000) Film4 6:50pm-8:55pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Super-powered outsiders Rogue and Wolverine enlist at a school for mutants which is run by a benevolent psychic professor. While there, they agree to join others with similar gifts to take on a superhuman mutant terrorist faction intent on establishing dominance over mankind. Sci-fi comic-book adventure, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Anna Paquin and Halle Berry.

Superhero Merchandise

Quantum of Solace (2008) ITV2 8:00pm-9:00pm (1 hour) 2 parts
James Bond sets out on a personal mission of vengeance as he pursues the secret criminal organisation Quantum. His search leads him to the head of an ecological corporation, who is plotting to orchestrate a coup in a Latin American country to get his hands on a precious natural resource. Spy thriller sequel, starring Daniel Craig, Olga Kurylenko, Judi Dench, Gemma Arterton and Mathieu Amalric.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, always bring enough food and drink and remember that some things you can change, some you can’t, so why worry about them?
xoxo

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