The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 84!
By the rivers of Babylon, not another weekend!
As the distinct twang of a hammer hitting a bell repeatedly sounds off to signify the start of art and crafts time. Let us put our nimble fingers to work as we mould out of plasticine for you mega movie magic, we'll glue together toilet roll tubes and breakfast cereal boxes and cover them with cinematic joyousness before we stand back with proud bewilderment and glee at our masterpiece we call celluloid wonder.
Have a happy retro weekend!
SATURDAY 25th JANURAY
The Three Musketeers (1993) More4 11:05am-1:10pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The king of France's elite personal guard is disbanded, but three of them refuse to lay down their swords. Aided by an impetuous young man keen to join their ranks, the trio set out to foil an evil cardinal's plot to seize the throne for himself by capturing the cleric's wily female spy. Swashbuckling comedy adventure, with Kiefer Sutherland, Charlie Sheen, Oliver Platt, Chris O'Donnell, Tim Curry and Rebecca De Mornay.
Muppets from Space (1999) Sky1 8:15pm-10:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Gonzo hits the road with pal Rizzo in tow and goes in search of his roots - only to make the amazing discovery that his parents belonged to a race of aliens. He then has to choose whether to board a UFO and return to his family, or stay with the friends he knows and loves. Family comedy, with F Murray Abraham, David Arquette, Ray Liotta, Andie MacDowell and Rob Schneider alongside the puppets.
Starsky & Hutch (2004) GOLD 9:00pm-11:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Two mismatched detectives are forced to work together for the first time to track down a crime kingpin who has introduced a new, undetectable narcotic to the streets - but they struggle to get along. Comedy spoofing the 1970s cop show, starring Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Snoop Dogg, Vince Vaughn and Juliette Lewis.
Braveheart (1995) Film4 9:00pm-12:20am (3 hours 20 minutes)
Account of the life of medieval Scottish hero William Wallace. After the slaughter of his father and brother, young Wallace is taken in by his uncle, who teaches him how to use not only his brawn but his brain - which he employs to great effect years later when he resolves to drive the English out of Scotland. Oscar-winning historical epic, directed by and starring Mel Gibson. With Patrick McGoohan, Sophie Marceau and Catherine McCormack.
SUNDAY 26th JANUARY
Last Action Hero (1993) Sky Movies Greats 5:45pm-8:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A boy watching an action movie is transported into the film by a magic ticket and meets its hero figure, who refuses to believe he is a fictional character. Matters take a turn for the worse when the screen villain gets hold of the ticket and crosses over into the real world - where bad guys can win. Comedy adventure, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Austin O'Brien, Charles Dance, F Murray Abraham and Anthony Quinn.
Outbreak (1995) Channel 5 6:35pm-8:50pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An expert in infectious diseases races against time to find a cure for a rapidly fatal airborne virus which is wiping out the population of a small town, and is threatening to turn into a pandemic. However, his task is hampered by senior military men, who are bent on burning down the town and incinerating the virus with it, regardless of any casualties. Thriller, with Dustin Hoffman, Rene Russo, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Spacey and Donald Sutherland. Edited for language.
Kick-Ass (2010) Film4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A teenage comic-book fan sets out to become a real-life superhero. His amateur crime-fighting exploits make him a media sensation, but he is soon in over his head as he encounters a sadistic gangster and a father-daughter vigilante team with a far more lethal approach to cleaning up the streets. Comic-book action comedy, with Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Grace Moretz and Nicolas Cage. Shown with an introduction by director Matthew Vaughn.
Mean Girls (2004) Sky Movies Comedy 11:30pm-1:10am (1 hour 40 minutes)
A teenager is surprised when she is befriended by the girls in the most popular clique at her new school. However, a dating mishap leads to trouble and her supposed friends start to turn on her. Urged on by other pals outside their circle, the newcomer resolves to bring down the self-appointed queen of campus - only to end up adopting some of her rival's crueller characteristics. Comedy, with Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Tina Fey and Lacey Chabert
Whatever you get up to this weekend remember to always have a backup plan if your going to take over the world and always enjoy yourselves.
xoxo