Cheese and wine! It’s only the weekend again!
So like a weary city slicker at the end of another long week, we find ourselves easing into a nice calm and relaxing Friday night as we unwind and let the week’s woes slip away. We’ll set up base camp in front of only the very best classic retro films with a glass of wine, more snacks than a kids party and only a night of R&R ahead. Settling in for the night, we’ll let the likes of Harrison Ford, Tom Hanks, Bill Murray, Michael J. Fox, and Robert De Niro take us to far and distant lands full of adventure and mystery. Bliss!
Have a happy retro weekend!
SATURDAY 18th SEPTEMBER
Escape to Victory (1981) More4 10:35am-1:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Allied PoWs take to the football field when a group of Nazi officers comes up with the idea to have them take on a German team for a propaganda event. However, the prisoners see a chance to escape during the match. Second World War adventure, with Michael Caine, Sylvester Stallone, Max von Sydow and Daniel Massey. Soccer legends also making appearances include Pele, Bobby Moore and Ossie Ardiles.
Top Gun (1986) Sky Movies Action & Adventure HD 12:25pm-2:30pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
An arrogant pilot’s maverick flying skills earn him a place in an elite US Navy school, where he comes into conflict with a fellow student and falls for his civilian instructor. A tragedy in the air threatens to end his military career – until an international incident offers him a chance to redeem himself. Aerial action adventure, starring Tom Cruise, Kelly McGillis, Val Kilmer, Anthony Edwards and Tom Skerritt.
Fletch (1985) Film4 1:00pm-3:00pm (2 hours )
A wisecracking reporter and master of disguise is approached by a businessman who claims to be terminally ill and is looking to pay someone to kill him. The journalist discovers the supposedly dying man is in perfect health, and his strange request is part of a complex scam. Comedy mystery based on Gregory Mcdonald’s novel, with Chevy Chase and Tim Matheson.
Smokey and the Bandit II (1980) ITV4 3:45pm-5:50pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The maverick haulier must overcome a crisis of confidence when he and his friends are hired to transport a pregnant elephant to Texas, a mammoth task that proves far from easy, especially with their old enemy in hot pursuit. Road comedy, with Burt Reynolds, Jackie Gleason, Jerry Reed, Dom DeLuise and Sally Field.
Edward Scissorhands (1990) E4 6:30pm-8:30pm (2 hours )
A reclusive genius creates a boy but dies before completing him, leaving his brainchild with scissor-like blades in place of hands. A kindly woman from a nearby suburb takes pity on the lonely figure and welcomes him into her home. He quickly becomes a hit in the neighbourhood – but then his new friends start to turn against him. Tim Burton’s fantasy, starring Johnny Depp, Winona Ryder, Dianne Wiest and Vincent Price.
Bean (1997) ITV2 7:40pm-9:30pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The hapless fool is employed as a security guard for a British art gallery and is sent to Los Angeles to bring back a famous painting. Unfortunately, he finds himself mistaken for a renowned art professor and invited to make an important presentation. Mel Smith’s British comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Burt Reynolds, Peter MacNicol, John Mills, Peter Capaldi and June Brown.
Twelve Monkeys (1995) Syfy 9:00pm-11:50pm (2 hours 50 minutes)
A time traveller from 2035 journeys back to the 1990s to discover the cause of a deadly disease that ravaged the world, only to be thrown into an asylum. He meets a fellow patient who may hold the key to his mission, but the longer he spends in the past, the more he comes to question whether he really is from the future or simply delusional. Terry Gilliam’s sci-fi thriller, with Bruce Willis, Brad Pitt, Madeleine Stowe and Christopher Plummer.
SUNDAY 19th SEPTEMBER
Carry On Don’t Lose Your Head (1966) ITV3 6:50am-8:40am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A cunning English nobleman puts his talent for disguise to good use by rescuing aristocrats from execution during the French Revolution. However, the leader of the secret police is determined to unmask the elusive hero spiriting the nobility out from under the guillotine. Comedy spoof of the Scarlet Pimpernel story, starring Sid James, Kenneth Williams, Joan Sims, Jim Dale and Charles Hawtrey.
Smokey and the Bandit (1977) ITV4 12:55pm-2:50pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A truck driver accepts a challenge to deliver a consignment of beer to a party. He claims he can make the 900-mile round trip in just 28 hours, but a pompous sheriff is determined to stop him in his tracks, not least because his prospective daughter-in-law has deserted his son and hitched a ride with the unlikely hero. Comedy, starring Burt Reynolds, Jackie Gleason, Sally Field and Jerry Reed.
Fun Fact: This movie made the Pontiac Trans Am a superstar. Trans Am sales jumped from 68,745 in 1977 to 93,341 in 1978. And just one year later that number swelled to 117,108 units sold.
10 Things I Hate About You (1999) Channel 4 1:30pm-3:25pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Lively teenager Bianca is not allowed to start dating until her man-hating sister Kat does first – but no boy is brave enough to ask her out. However, Bianca’s would-be boyfriend thinks he has found the perfect man for the job in the shape of a quirky loner with a mysterious past. Comedy, based on Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew, starring Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Larisa Oleynik.
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992) Film4 1:00pm-3:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Hapless youngster Kevin somehow manages to catch the wrong plane and finds himself heading for New York, while his family jets off to Florida. Having got his hands on his father’s credit card, he is enjoying the good life staying in a luxury hotel – until he bumps into two familiar burglars with an axe to grind. Comedy sequel, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, Brenda Fricker and Tim Curry.
Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) Comedy Central 5:15pm-7:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
The eccentric pet detective is coaxed out of self-imposed exile in a Buddhist monastery to visit Africa and help search for a sacred white bat. However, his unique investigative talents are tested to the limits as he faces a race against time to find the missing creature and prevent a tribal war. Comedy sequel, starring Jim Carrey, Simon Callow and Bob Gunton.
Twins (1988) ITV2 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
An unlikely pair of brothers, who were born as the result of a one-off genetic experiment and separated at birth, are reunited in adulthood. They set out on a cross-country search for their unknown mother – fending off vicious loan sharks and a professional assassin along the way. Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, Kelly Preston and Chloe Webb.
Red Heat (1988) ITV4 10:00pm-12:10am (2 hours 10 minutes)
A Russian detective travels to America to oversee the extradition of a Georgian drug baron responsible for supplying cocaine in Moscow. He is teamed up with a hostile Chicago cop, but when their prisoner kills an officer and escapes, they put aside their mutual mistrust to bring him to justice. Action thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Belushi, Peter Boyle, Laurence Fishburne and Ed O’Ross.
The 51st State (2001) BBC3 10:00pm-11:25pm (1 hour 25 minutes)
An American drug dealer decides to retire from a life of crime and plans to raise the necessary funds through one final sale in Liverpool. There he has to contend with crooked cops, a neo-Nazi gang and a hitwoman in the employ of his old boss. Action comedy, starring Samuel L Jackson, Robert Carlyle, Emily Mortimer, Meat Loaf, Ricky Tomlinson, Sean Pertwee and Rhys Ifans.
Fun Fact: Writer Stel Pavlou was actually working as an assistant in a liquor store when he penned his screenplay.
Virus (1999) Syfy 10:00pm-12:00am (2 hours)
A salvage tug sailing perilously close to a typhoon discovers an abandoned Russian science vessel. Members of the crew board the ship, only to discover it has been taken over by an alien life form made of pure energy, which can create warriors out of organic and mechanical components and plans to eradicate the human race. Sci-fi thriller, starring Jamie Lee Curtis and Donald Sutherland.
Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make sure you keep secrets a secret and blow out the candles before you go to bed.