Well hello another weekend! So great to see you again.
Like one of the most eager warehouse workers there has ever been, we find ourselves packing boxes like fitting a plethora or top retro films into a weekend. Thinking carefully and planning to fit everything in, we’ll twist and turn our contents to make it fit just so before taping it all up, standing back and admiring our crafty work.
Have a happy retro weekend!
SATURDAY 27th FEBRUARY
Black Knight (2001) Film4 1:00pm-2:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
An employee at a run-down medieval theme park suffers a nasty fall and knocks himself out – only to wake up in 14th-century England, where he gets up to all manner of mischief with the knights in shining armour and damsels in distress. Comedy adventure, starring Martin Lawrence, Tom Wilkinson and Marsha Thomason.
Superman (1978) ITV4 4:15pm-7:10pm (2 hours 55 minutes)
A fledgling superhero crash-lands on Earth after evacuation from his home planet and is taken in by an elderly couple who raise him as their own. But with adolescence comes a greater understanding of his superhuman powers, leading to his rebirth as a crusader for justice and defender of the American way of life. Comic-strip adventure, with Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Margot Kidder and Marlon Brando.
Wayne’s World 2 (1993) Comedy Central 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
Heavy metal fanatics Wayne and Garth try to stage a giant Woodstock-style rock festival, with a little help from a spaced-out British roadie and the ghost of Jim Morrison. But Wayne also has to stop his girlfriend leaving him for her slimy manager. Comedy sequel, starring Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Ralph Brown, Kim Basinger, Tia Carrere and Christopher Walken.
Back to the Future (1985) ITV2 7:25pm-9:45pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.
Tremors (1989) ITV4 9:00pm-10:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A dull American town in the middle of the desert is suddenly attacked by huge man-eating subterranean creatures. Luckily, two dimwitted but brave handymen step into the breach to lead a ragtag bunch of locals and a mismatched pair of survivalists in the battle against the gruesome worm-like monsters. Comedy horror, with Kevin Bacon, Fred Ward, Finn Carter, Michael Gross, Reba McEntire and Bobby Jacoby.
Scream 2 (1997) Sky1 10:00pm-12:20am (2 hours 20 minutes)
A second serial killer adopts the ghost mask and embarks on a campaign of murder, while survivors of the first massacre try to get to the bottom of the terrifying mystery. Wes Craven’s horror sequel, starring Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jada Pinkett Smith and Jamie Kennedy.
Raw Deal (1986) ITV4 10:55pm-1:05am (2 hours 10 minutes)
An FBI agent is discharged for insubordination after assaulting a suspect, and ends up reduced to being the sheriff of a backwater Southern town. He is later offered his old job back – on the condition he will infiltrate a gang of Chicago mobsters and bring their leader to justice for killing the son of the Bureau’s chief. Action thriller, with Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sam Wanamaker, Kathryn Harrold, Ed Lauter and Darren McGavin.
Braveheart (1995) 10:55pm-2:05am (3 hours 10 minutes)
Account of the life of medieval Scottish hero William Wallace. After the slaughter of his father and brother, young Wallace is taken in by his uncle, who teaches him how to use not only his brawn but his brain – which he employs to great effect years later when he resolves to drive the English out of Scotland. Oscar-winning historical epic, directed by and starring Mel Gibson. With Patrick McGoohan, Sophie Marceau and Catherine McCormack.
SUNDAY 28th FEBRUARY
Death Becomes Her (1992) 7:50am-9:55am (2 hours 5 minutes)
Two romantic rivals are both granted the secret of eternal youth by a mysterious mystic. However, as they battle to get their claws into a plastic surgeon, they discover their now-immortal bodies are capable of taking whatever damage they can dish out. Black comedy fantasy, starring Goldie Hawn, Meryl Streep, Bruce Willis and Isabella Rossellini.
Beethoven’s 2nd (1993) ITV2 1:35pm-3:20pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
The slobbering St Bernard is now grown up and in love with his beautiful sweetheart Missy. Together they bring a litter of puppies into the world – but have to go on the defensive when Missy’s owner, the evil Regina, sets out to steal them for herself. Comedy sequel, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Chris Penn, Nicholle Tom and Christopher Castle.
Short Circuit 2 (1988) Sony Channel 2:00pm-4:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Manic mechanoid Johnny Five meets an old friend in New York City and embarks on a fact-finding tour – but ends up entangled in a series of escapades culminating in a bank robbery. Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Fisher Stevens, Michael McKean, Cynthia Gibb and Jack Weston, with the voice of Tim Blaney.
The Dark Crystal (1982) Film4 2:45pm-4:30pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A survivor of a near-extinct race is given a dangerous quest as his world approaches an astronomical event that will decide its future. He must find a way to restore a broken piece to a magical crystal, which has become a source of dark power for the cruel creatures who wiped out his people. Jim Henson’s puppet fantasy, with the voices of Stephen Garlick and Billie Whitelaw.
Despicable Me 2 (2013) ITV2 3:20pm-5:20pm (2 hours)
A reformed criminal mastermind who has abandoned his wicked ways for a life of fatherhood and jam-making helps a secret agent to bring one of his fellow evil geniuses to justice. The villain in question has stolen a dangerous experimental serum with the power to turn harmless animals into ravening monsters. Animated comedy sequel, with the voices of Steve Carell and Kristen Wiig.
The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) ITV 3:35pm-6:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
James Bond’s investigation into the death of a world-renowned scientist working on solar technology draws him into a battle of wits with a stealthy assassin, who dispatches his victims with a golden bullet and has the British secret agent next in his sights. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Christopher Lee, Britt Ekland and Maud Adams.
Tron (1982) BBC2 4:40pm-6:10pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
A computer genius hacks into the mainframe of the company he used to work for, hoping to find evidence against the executive who stole his ideas. However, the intelligent master program running the system transports him into an electronic world, where he is forced to battle gladiators in a series of deadly games. Disney sci-fi adventure, starring Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner and David Warner.
Entrapment (1999) 5STAR 4:45pm-7:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An elusive professional art thief suspected of stealing a priceless painting is pursued by an insurance agent. However, instead of bringing the criminal to book, she teams up with him to plot the robbery of a lifetime – although neither is sure the other can be trusted. Crime thriller, starring Sean Connery, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Ving Rhames, Will Patton and Maury Chaykin. Including Access at 17.45.
Fun Fact: The film came in $2 million below its budget. Co-producer Rhonda Tollefson credits this to Producer Sean Connery’s thrifty Scottish ways.
Finding Nemo (2003) 5:10pm-7:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Clown fish Nemo becomes separated from his friends on the Great Barrier Reef – but the thrill of being able to swim freely and away from his overprotective father turns to horror when he is netted by a diver. His distraught dad sets out on a mission to find him and is joined by a host of colourful characters along the way. Pixar animated adventure, with the voices of Albert Brooks, Ellen DeGeneres, Alexander Gould, Willem Dafoe, Barry Humphries and Geoffrey Rush.
Back to the Future Part II (1989) ITV2 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Time-travelling teenager Marty McFly travels to the 21st century, where he has to save his children from a terrible fate. However, this proves to have unforeseen consequences when the future version of arch enemy Biff sees a chance to rewrite history for his own benefit, leaving Marty stuck in a twisted parallel universe. Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Michael J Fox and Christopher Lloyd.
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) Sony Channel 9:00pm-10:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A velvet-clad, sex-crazed secret agent from the 1960s agrees to be put into a state of suspended animation after his arch-enemy escapes justice. Thirty years later he is defrosted to do battle with the power-mad villain again, but the mission proves nearly as daunting for him as getting to grips with 1990s social values. Spoof spy adventure, with Mike Myers, Elizabeth Hurley, Mimi Rogers, Michael York and Robert Wagner.
Shaun of the Dead (2004) ITV2 10:30pm-12:30am (2 hours)
An unambitious 29-year-old man trapped in the job from hell and recently dumped decides to get his life back on track. Unfortunately, he has to put his plans on hold when zombies rise from their graves and stalk the streets of London’s suburbs to feast on the living. Comedy horror, starring Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Kate Ashfield, Dylan Moran, Lucy Davis, Bill Nighy and Penelope Wilton.
Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make sure you keep to your brownie or scouts honour and remember it’s better to dress for cold and be warm, than dress for warm and be cold.