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September 15th 2017 by Iain

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 259

Sweet home Alabama! Another retro movie weekend has come among us and is here to bring adventure, drama and some good old fashioned fun!

Click-lock and looking good! Ripping up the old and warn carpet like a dog hunting for a bone, we'll quickly reveal the bare boards which hide below. Starting afresh, we'll lay down the new smelling and super soft underlay before starting to cut and slide into place the shiny new flooring. With each new board laid down, we will see our vision come to life as we stitch together our new look like an an oversized game of Tetris.

SATURDAY 16th September

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The Rugrats Movie (1999) Film4 1:00pm-2:35pm (1 hour 35 minutes)

Tommy tries to return his new brother to the baby shop, helped by Angelica, Chuckie, Phil and Lil - but the friends get lost in dense woodlands en route, turning their expedition into a scary and exciting journey of discovery. Animated comedy based on the TV series, with the voices of Elizabeth Daily, Christine Cavanaugh, Kath Soucie, Whoopi Goldberg and Busta Rhymes.

The Three Musketeers (1973) Film4 2:35pm-4:45pm (2 hours 10 minutes)

A naive country boy arrives in Paris, keen to seek adventure and prove himself a swordsman. He falls in with a trio of roguish soldiers, and together they set out to save the queen from the schemes of a treacherous cardinal. Swashbuckling adventure, starring Oliver Reed, Michael York, Richard Chamberlain, Frank Finlay, Charlton Heston and Faye Dunaway.

The Pink Panther (1963) ITV4 3:25pm-5:45pm

The world's most inept police detective, Inspector Clouseau, heads off to Switzerland in search of a suave jewel thief who has purloined a priceless diamond from a princess - but the bumbling officer's every ruse to foil the crime ends in chaos, not least when he is framed for the robbery himself. Blake Edwards' comedy, starring Peter Sellers, David Niven, Capucine, Robert Wagner and Claudia Cardinale.

Fun Fact: The film was intended to have David Niven's character Sir Charles Lytton as the main character. However, Peter Sellers' portrayal of Inspector Clouseau was so loved by the crew (and later by the audience) it became his character that this film and the sequels focused on.

Bean (1997) ITV 4:00pm-5:35pm (1 hour 35 minutes)

The hapless fool is employed as a security guard for a British art gallery and is sent to Los Angeles to bring back a famous painting. Unfortunately, he finds himself mistaken for a renowned art professor and invited to make an important presentation. Mel Smith's British comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Burt Reynolds, Peter MacNicol, John Mills, Peter Capaldi and June Brown.

Field of Dreams (1989) Film4 4:45pm-6:55pm (2 hours 10 minutes)

A farmer hears a mysterious voice inspiring him to mark out a baseball diamond in a cornfield - which, to his surprise, is visited by the ghost of the star player of the 1919 Chicago White Sox team, whose career was cut short by scandal. It later dawns on him the pitch has a greater purpose - to give people who have sacrificed important parts of their lives a second chance. Fantasy, starring Kevin Costner, Ray Liotta, Burt Lancaster and James Earl Jones.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) ITV4 5:45pm-7:45pm

A cocky teenager plays truant from school and spends the day dragging his girlfriend and a reluctant friend into all manner of crazy adventures in the big city - while the school's dean of students vows to stop at nothing to prove the youngster is faking illness. Comedy, starring Matthew Broderick, Mia Sara, Alan Ruck, Jennifer Grey, Jeffrey Jones and Charlie Sheen.

Ferris Bueller Clothing

Dante's Peak (1997) Film4 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)

A vulcanologist's suspicions that a long-dormant volcano is about to erupt turn out to be true, prompting him to race against time to save the community standing in its way - and clash with local government officials weighing his predictions against the loss in tourism revenue. Disaster movie, starring Pierce Brosnan, Linda Hamilton, Elizabeth Hoffman and Charles Hallahan.

Fun Fact: A great many special effects in the movie were practical special effects, using real-world models or full-size properties and vehicles.

A Few Good Men (1992) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:55pm

Two marines based in Cuba stand accused of murdering a comrade-in-arms. Three Navy lawyers working on their defence unearth evidence that the soldiers may have been acting under orders, which points to a trail of corruption leading all the way to a top-ranking officer. Drama based on Aaron Sorkin's stage play, starring Tom Cruise, Demi Moore, Kevin Pollack, Jack Nicholson, Kiefer Sutherland and Kevin Bacon.

The Fast and the Furious (2001) ITV2 9:00pm-11:10pm

In a move to identify suspected hijackers, an undercover police officer infiltrates the high-octane world of illegal late-night street racing by rival gangs. He is befriended by a champion driver, but when he also forms a bond with the racer's sister, he is pitched into a conflict of loyalties. Thriller, starring Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez and Jordana Brewster.

The Nutty Professor (1996) ITV 10:35pm-12:20am (1 hour 45 minutes)

An obese, terminally shy professor invents a potion that transforms him into a slim, loud-mouthed charmer. His new streamlined self immediately sets out to woo the woman of his dreams - but soon starts to ride roughshod over everything he used to care about. Remake of the 1963 Jerry Lewis comedy, starring Eddie Murphy, Jada Pinkett Smith, James Coburn and Larry Miller.

SUNDAY 17th September

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Hook (1991) Sony Movie Channel 9:10am-12:15pm

Peter Pan, who has finally grown up and is now a married lawyer with a family of his own, is whisked away by Tinkerbell to Neverland, where he must learn to fly again if he is to save his children from the clutches of Captain Hook. Steven Spielberg's fantasy adventure, with Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman, Julia Roberts, Bob Hoskins and Maggie Smith.

Matilda (1996) Sony Movie Channel 2:25pm-4:30pm

A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad - and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children's book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Matilda Merchandise

Never Say Never Again (1983) ITV 3:00pm-5:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)

James Bond investigates the hijacking of two American nuclear warheads and tracks the stolen missiles to the Bahamas, where a sinister millionaire working for criminal organisation Spectre is planning to hold the world to ransom. Action adventure, starring Sean Connery, Klaus Maria Brandauer, Kim Basinger, Max von Sydow and Barbara Carrera.

James Bond Clothing

Jumanji (1995) Sony Movie Channel 4:30pm-6:40pm

A man who has been trapped inside a mysterious jungle board game for 26 years is eventually freed when two children start to play it. Unfortunately, he arrives with a rampaging horde of animals on his heels, leaving only one solution - to finish the game he started all those years ago. Fantasy adventure, starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst and Bonnie Hunt.

The Secret of My Success (1987) Sony Movie Channel 6:40pm-9:00pm

A naive country boy travels to New York to make his fortune, only to end up working in a corporation's mail room. He chances on a vacant office and hatches a plan to pass himself off as a top-ranking executive, but leading a double life proves harder than expected. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, Helen Slater, Richard Jordan and Fred Gwynne.

Home Alone (1990) E4 8:00pm-10:00pm (2 hours)

A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O'Hara and John Candy.

Home Alone TShirts

Airplane! (1980) ITV4 9:00pm-10:50pm

The passengers on board an ill-fated airliner become increasingly jittery when the flight crew flounder during a food-poisoning crisis. As ground control personnel struggle heroically to ensure the plane lands safely, a traumatised war veteran must face his fear to take the controls. Spoof disaster movie, starring Robert Hays, Leslie Nielsen, Robert Stack and Lloyd Bridges.

Airplane! Merchandise

Whatever you're up to this weekend, always hope for the best but prepare for the worst.