The Christmas Retro Movie Rundown
As a wise man from Slade once said... IT'S CHRIIISTMAAAS!
We'll folks, we've pretty much made it and no doubt you will have already started on some form of festivities (we sure have!).
Helping this year to be a merry as ever, we're back again with another movie rundown to keep you on top of some of our top classic films beaming their way into your homes. Sit back, relax and Merry Christmas.
Christmas Eve
Dr Dolittle (1998) E4 10:20am-12:00pm
A doctor is stunned to discover he can talk to animals, and it is not long before his home and surgery are taken over by an assortment of ailing creatures in need of help. However, when the medic's odd behaviour attracts his colleagues' attention, he is forced to rely on his new-found furry friends to save him from the asylum. Comedy, starring Eddie Murphy, Ossie Davis and Oliver Platt.
Small Soldiers (1998) Channel 4 11:05am-1:10pm
A hi-tech computer chip has a bizarre effect on a squad of toy soldiers, causing mayhem for their owner as the miniature marauders engage in a series of scaled-down skirmishes. Children's adventure mixing live-action and computer animation, starring Kirsten Dunst, Denis Leary and Gregory Smith, with the voices of Tommy Lee Jones, Frank Langella, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Christina Ricci.
How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) ITV 12:40pm-2:40pm
A little girl residing in the Christmas-obsessed town of Whoville becomes fascinated with a grouchy creature living in the mountains. But her efforts to make him part of their celebrations leave him more bitter than ever, and he resolves to ruin the festive season. Fantasy comedy, based on Dr Seuss's children's book, with Jim Carrey, Taylor Momsen, Jeffrey Tambor and Molly Shannon. Anthony Hopkins narrates.
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A Christmas Carol (1984) Channel 4 1:10pm-3:15pm
Miser Ebenezer Scrooge is given a Christmas Eve to remember when a quartet of ghosts - his dead business partner and the spirits of Christmases past, present and future - turn up determined to cure him of his money-grubbing ways. Adaptation of Charles Dickens' classic, starring George C Scott, Nigel Davenport, Frank Finlay, Angela Pleasence, David Warner, Edward Woodward and Susannah York.
My Fair Lady (1964) Channel 5 2:55pm-6:35pm
Henry Higgins, a professor of phonetics, bets his friend Colonel Pickering that he can teach cockney flower girl Eliza Doolittle to speak like a duchess. Oscar-winning musical, based on George Bernard Shaw's play Pygmalion, starring Audrey Hepburn, Rex Harrison and Stanley Holloway. Songs featured include I Could Have Danced All Night, and Wouldn't It Be Loverly.
Frozen (2013) BBC One 3:00pm-4:35pm
A princess with the power to freeze anything she touches loses control of her abilities and plunges the kingdom into a perpetual winter. She goes into hiding, but her sister remains determined that she can be saved from her own magic and sets off on a quest to find her, aided by a mountain man and a living snowman. Disney animated fantasy adventure, with the voices of Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel.
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Elf (2003) ITV 5:15pm-7:00pm
A child is taken in by kind-hearted Santa and raised as an elf - so it comes as a shock when he discovers years later that he is in fact human. Deciding to get back to his roots, he heads off for New York in search of his long-lost family, but is ill-prepared for the hustle and bustle of the Big Apple. Fantasy comedy, starring Will Ferrell, James Caan, Zooey Deschanel and Edward Asner.
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Home Alone (1990) Channel 4 5:30pm-7:30pm
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O'Hara and John Candy.
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The Holiday (2006) ITV2 8:00pm-10:40pm
Two single women living on opposite sides of the Atlantic agree to exchange houses over the Christmas holidays. In their new surroundings, both women unexpectedly encounter prospective partners, but as the house swap draws to a close, difficult decisions have to be made about their blossoming relationships. Romantic comedy, starring Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet, Jack Black, Jude Law and Eli Wallach.
Die Hard 2 (1990) Film4 9:00pm-11:25pm
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife, but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton.
Christmas Day
Disney's A Christmas Carol (2009) ITV 9:25am-11:10am
A foul-tempered Victorian miser who hates the festive season is visited on Christmas Eve by a series of ghosts. The spirits intend to make him mend his wicked ways by showing him visions of the past, the present and what the future will hold for him if he does not change for the better. An animated fantasy based on Charles Dickens' novel, featuring motion-captured performances by Jim Carrey and Gary Oldman.
Junior (1994) 5STAR 10:20am-12:35pm
A fertility expert pioneers a treatment enabling men to become pregnant and carry babies to full term. When the authorities cancel funding for the research, he decides to test it on himself, but gives little thought to how difficult it will be to keep it a secret. The situation is further complicated when he starts to fall for the woman whose child he is carrying. Comedy, with Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, Emma Thompson and Frank Langella.
Twins (1988) 5STAR 12:35pm-2:45pm
An unlikely pair of brothers, who were born as the result of a one-off genetic experiment and separated at birth, are reunited in adulthood. They set out on a cross-country search for their unknown mother - fending off vicious loan sharks and a professional assassin along the way. Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, Kelly Preston and Chloe Webb.
How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) ITV2 2:00pm-4:10pm
A little girl residing in the Christmas-obsessed town of Whoville becomes fascinated with a grouchy creature living in the mountains. But her efforts to make him part of their celebrations leave him more bitter than ever, and he resolves to ruin the festive season. Fantasy comedy, based on Dr Seuss's children's book, with Jim Carrey, Taylor Momsen, Jeffrey Tambor and Molly Shannon. Anthony Hopkins narrates.
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Turner & Hooch (1989) Film4 2:25pm-4:25pm
A Californian detective investigating the murder of a local man by drug smugglers has only one witness to help him solve the case - the large, smelly dog that belonged to the victim, which is about to turn the detective's well-ordered existence into chaos. Family comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Mare Winningham and Craig T Nelson.
Scrooge (1970) BBC Two 2:30pm-4:30pm
Hard-hearted Victorian miser Ebenezer Scrooge refuses to join in with the spirit of the festive season - until a succession of spectral visitors turn up to teach him the error of his ways. Musical adaptation of Charles Dickens' classic A Christmas Carol, starring Albert Finney, Alec Guinness, Kenneth More, Edith Evans and Paddy Stone.
Back to the Future (1985) Channel 4 2:35pm-4:55pm
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love - and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother's heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.
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Elf (2003) ITV2 4:10pm-6:00pm
A child is taken in by kind-hearted Santa and raised as an elf - so it comes as a shock when he discovers years later that he is in fact human. Deciding to get back to his roots, he heads off for New York in search of his long-lost family, but is ill-prepared for the hustle and bustle of the Big Apple. Fantasy comedy, starring Will Ferrell, James Caan, Zooey Deschanel and Edward Asner.
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Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992) Channel 4 4:55pm-7:10pm
Hapless youngster Kevin somehow manages to catch the wrong plane and finds himself heading for New York, while his family jets off to Florida. Having got his hands on his father's credit card, he is enjoying the good life staying in a luxury hotel - until he bumps into two familiar burglars with an axe to grind. Comedy sequel, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, Brenda Fricker and Tim Curry.
Uncle Buck (1989) ITV2 6:00pm-8:00pm
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away - and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.
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Independence Day (1996) Film4 6:15pm-9:00pm
A fleet of huge flying saucers launches a devastating and unprovoked attack on Earth. As survivors try to flee the seemingly unstoppable alien invaders, the courageous US president, an ace pilot and a computer genius come up with a plan to take the fight to the enemy and save the human race. Roland Emmerich's sci-fi adventure, starring Will Smith, Bill Pullman, Jeff Goldblum, Mary McDonnell, Randy Quaid, Robert Loggia and Harry Connick Jr.
Rocky II (1979) ITV4 8:00pm-10:25pm
Philadelphia boxer Rocky Balboa quits the ring to marry his sweetheart and become a father. However, times prove hard and money is tight, so when Balboa is offered another shot at Apollo Creed's heavyweight title, the fighter is lured out of retirement. Drama sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers, Burt Young and Burgess Meredith.
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Jurassic World (2015) ITV2 8:00pm-10:30pm
Decades on from the creation of Jurassic Park, a fully operational attraction filled with genetically engineered dinosaurs has been opened on the island. In need of a new attraction, the company behind the park creates an entirely new species - but it quickly escapes to terrorise the tourists. Action adventure sequel, starring Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard.
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Tremors (1990) ITV4 10:25pm-12:30am
A dull American town in the middle of the desert is suddenly attacked by huge man-eating subterranean creatures. Luckily, two dimwitted but brave handymen step into the breach to lead a ragtag bunch of locals and a mismatched pair of survivalists in the battle against the gruesome worm-like monsters. Comedy horror, with Kevin Bacon, Fred Ward, Finn Carter, Michael Gross, Reba McEntire and Bobby Jacoby
Boxing Day
Beethoven (1992) Channel 5 9:35am-11:25am
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.
Batteries Not Included (1987) Sony Movies 12:05pm-2:15pm
A family of tiny alien spacecraft intervenes to help the residents of a run-down Manhattan brownstone tenement stop greedy developers from demolishing their homes. However, the miniature flying saucers have the odds stacked against them as they bravely do all they can to save the day. Sci-fi fantasy, starring Jessica Tandy, Hume Cronyn, Frank McRae and Elizabeth Pena.
Groundhog Day (1993) Sony Movies 2:15pm-4:20pm
An obnoxious TV weatherman reporting on a small town's annual festival finds himself caught in a bizarre time loop, and is forced to relive the same day over and over again. While at first he tries to exploit his predicament, he is ultimately driven to mend his ways and adopt a less cynical attitude. Comedy, starring Bill Murray, Andie MacDowell, Chris Elliott and Stephen Tobolowsky.
The Jungle Book (2016) BBC One 3:45pm-5:25pm
A boy is raised by animals in the jungles of India, but his carefree life is threatened by the return of a fierce tiger with a grudge against humans. The youngster faces a difficult choice between remaining with his friends or returning to his own people. Live-action remake of Disney's animated adventure based on Rudyard Kipling's stories, starring Neel Sethi, with the voices of Bill Murray, Ben Kingsley and Idris Elba.
Matilda (1996) Sony Movies 4:20pm-6:25pm
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad - and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children's book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.
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Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) 5STAR 5:05pm-6:55pm
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog - as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin - the mascot of an American football team - and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.
Cool Runnings (1993) Channel 5 5:15pm-7:00pm
A sprinter fails to qualify for the Jamaican Olympic squad, but refuses to give up his dream. Learning that a former US bobsleigh coach is living nearby, he seizes the chance to shine in an entirely different sport, and cajoles three of his friends to join him in training for the 1988 Winter Olympics in the far less tropical environment of Canada. Fact-based comedy, with John Candy, Leon, Doug E Doug and Malik Yoba.
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Jurassic Park (1993) ITV2 6:25pm-9:00pm
Scientists are given a sneak preview of a safari park inhabited by genetically engineered dinosaurs created by an eccentric tycoon. However, it all goes wrong when a greedy employee sabotages the security systems, allowing the prehistoric beasts to roam free and hunt the visitors. Steven Spielberg's action-adventure, starring Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough and Samuel L Jackson.
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The Mask (1994) 5STAR 6:55pm-9:00pm
A timid bank clerk stumbles on an ancient mask, which endows whoever wears it with untold superhuman powers, unbridled self-confidence and an irresistible charm for the ladies. Unfortunately, he earns the enmity of a local gangster for daring to flirt with his girlfriend - and when the crook gets wind of the artefact's existence, he covets the power for himself. Comic-book comedy, with Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert and Peter Greene.
The Simpsons Movie (2007) E4 7:15pm-9:00pm
Homer unwittingly pollutes Lake Springfield, so the US government decides to isolate the city underneath a giant dome. The Simpsons manage to escape and plan to start a new life in Alaska - but learn Springfield is about to be destroyed, and return to save their friends. With the voices of Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright and Yeardley Smith.
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Rocky III (1982) ITV4 8:00pm-10:05pm
World heavyweight boxing champion Rocky Balboa settles down into a life of luxury - but a cloud appears on the horizon in the shape of ambitious contender Clubber Lang, whose brutal fighting style represents a serious threat to his title. Drama, starring Sylvester Stallone, Mr T, Burgess Meredith, Talia Shire, Burt Young, Carl Weathers and Hulk Hogan.
Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985) ITV4 10:05pm-11:55pm
Incarcerated Special Forces veteran John Rambo is offered the chance for freedom by former commander Colonel Trautman if he takes up the offer to return to the jungles of Vietnam on a life-or-death mission to rescue American PoWs. During the course of the operation, he develops strong feelings for his guide, a female freedom fighter - but tragedy strikes, leaving him more determined than ever to exact a bloody and explosive revenge. Action-adventure sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Julia Nickson-Soul, Steven Berkoff, George Kee Cheung, Andy Wood and Martin Kove.
Whatever you're up to this Christmas, we wish you all the best and hope you have a very magical time. Bring on 2020!