The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown – 417

Hopscotching our way into another weekend, we’re skipping through all the filler to pick up only the very best movies beaming their way to our screens! Which will you pick up?

SATURDAY 27th February

Beethoven (1992) 5STAR 1:05pm-2:55pm
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.

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Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987) ITV4 4:00pm-5:50pm
Commandant Lassard comes to the conclusion that his staff are overworked, so in an attempt to solve the problem, he assigns the clueless cops to teach a group of equally inept civilians how to combat crime. Comedy sequel, with Steve Guttenberg, Sharon Stone, Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow and David Graf.

Home Alone 3 (1997) Film4 4:15pm-6:20pm
Cheeky eight-year-old Alex Pruitt is delighted to be given a remote-controlled toy car by his neighbour – unaware it contains a stolen microchip. A gang of crooks heads to Alex’s town with the intention of recovering the valuable item, but the resourceful youngster has prepared for their arrival with a series of nasty booby-traps. Comedy sequel, starring Alex D Linz, Olek Krupa, Rya Kihlstedt and Lenny von Dohlen.

Ghostbusters (2016) Film4 6:20pm-9:00pm
When a series of supernatural disturbances occur in New York City, two experts in the paranormal investigate, joined by a brilliant inventor who has created an array of ghost-hunting gadgets and a public transport worker whose knowledge of the city provides vital clues to the sinister cause of the ghostly activity. A reboot of the 1980s comedy franchise, starring Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones and Chris Hemsworth.

Ghostbusters Gifts

Ghostbusters Heat Change TV Shaped Mug

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Star Trek Into Darkness (2013) Channel 4 6:30pm-9:00pm
Captain Kirk and the crew of the starship Enterprise are sent on a clandestine mission into enemy territory to track down the rogue Starfleet agent behind a terrorist attack on Earth. However, the assignment brings to light a hidden threat from within their own organisation. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto and Benedict Cumberbatch.

Star Trek Gifts

Star Trek Commander Wallet

The Fifth Element (1997) Paramount Network 9:00pm-11:35pm
In the 23rd century, the world faces destruction from a seemingly unstoppable force of pure evil. Meanwhile, a New York cab driver encounters a mysterious woman destined to save the Earth from its fate and has to protect her from a scheming arms dealer and a horde of alien mercenaries. Luc Besson’s sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis, Milla Jovovich and Gary Oldman.

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The World Is Not Enough
(1999) ITV 11:05pm-1:25am
James Bond is assigned to protect the heiress of an oil dynasty after her father is killed in a bombing at MI6 headquarters. The attack is the work of an infamous terrorist who is unable to feel pain after surviving a gunshot to his head, and who now intends to destroy the world’s supply of oil. Spy adventure, starring Pierce Brosnan, Robert Carlyle, Sophie Marceau and Robbie Coltrane.

Apocalypse Now: The Final Cut (1979) BBC Two 11:00pm-1:55am
An army captain is sent on a top-secret mission into Cambodia, where his goal is to find and assassinate a renegade colonel who has gone insane and is worshipped by his followers as a god. However, as his patrol boat journeys further upriver, the conflict and disarray surrounding him become increasingly disturbing and nightmarish. The extended version of Francis Ford Coppola’s acclaimed Vietnam War drama – re-edited in 2019 by the director himself to mark the film’s 40th anniversary. Starring Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando and Robert Duvall.

SUNDAY 28th February

Edward Scissorhands (1990) Film4 11:00am-1:05pm
A reclusive genius creates a boy but dies before completing him, leaving his brainchild with scissor-like blades in place of hands. A kindly woman from a nearby suburb takes pity on the lonely figure and welcomes him into her home. He quickly becomes a hit in the neighbourhood – but then his new friends start to turn against him. Tim Burton’s fantasy, starring Johnny Depp, Winona Ryder, Dianne Wiest and Vincent Price.

The Karate Kid (1984) Sony Movies 2:00pm-4:30pm
A teenager at a new school befriends a pretty girl, but her ex-boyfriend is jealous and attacks him. During one particularly bad fight, a wise old caretaker intervenes and defeats the youngster’s assailants using his martial art skills. He goes on to mentor the boy and teaches him karate so he can face his enemies in a tournament. Drama, with Ralph Macchio, Pat Morita and Elisabeth Shue.

Karate Kid TShirts

Black Cobra Kai Logo T-Shirt

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The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997) ITV 2:05pm-4:35pm
Scientist Dr Ian Malcolm reluctantly joins a research team on the island where his employer first designed genetically engineered dinosaurs. Meanwhile, a big-game hunter takes the chance to bag the biggest prize of all – a Tyrannosaurus rex. Steven Spielberg’s dinosaur adventure sequel, starring Jeff Goldblum, Julianne Moore, Pete Postlethwaite and Richard Attenborough.

Jurassic Park Pyjamas

Men's Jurassic Park Pyjamas

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Miss Potter (2006) Channel 5 3:10pm-5:00pm
Victorian writer and illustrator Beatrix Potter is unable to find a firm willing to give her book based on a character called Peter Rabbit a chance until a timid publisher with whom she falls in love takes on her project. A biographical period drama, starring Renee Zellweger, Ewan McGregor, Emily Watson and Barbara Flynn.

The Karate Kid Part II (1986) Sony Movies 4:30pm-6:45pm
High-kicking teenager Daniel accompanies his venerable mentor, Mr Miyagi when he returns to the Japanese province of Okinawa to visit his dying father. However, an old rival of Miyagi’s is waiting for them, while Daniel is drawn into a vicious conflict with their enemy’s own karate protege. Martial arts sequel, starring Ralph Macchio, Pat Morita and Yuji Okumoto.

The Karate Kid Part III (1989) Sony Movies 6:45pm-9:00pm
The teenage martial arts expert becomes obsessed with defending his championship title, but wise mentor Mr Miyagi is not prepared to help him fight for such a shallow goal. Seeking someone else to help guide his career, he falls under the influence of a crooked trainer – who is secretly plotting his downfall with the help of an old adversary. Adventure sequel, starring Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita.

Smokey and the Bandit II (1980) Paramount Network 6:55pm-9:00pm
The maverick haulier must overcome a crisis of confidence when he and his friends are hired to transport a pregnant elephant to Texas, a mammoth task that proves far from easy, especially with their old enemy in hot pursuit. Road comedy, with Burt Reynolds, Jackie Gleason, Jerry Reed, Dom DeLuise and Sally Field.

Sahara (1995) Sony Movies Action 9:00pm-11:15pm
An American tank commander leads his crew back to Allied lines after the fall of Tobruk during the Second World War. Along the way, they pick up some stranded soldiers and discover an abandoned well in the desert. With the German army bearing down on them, he decides to fight for control of the valuable water source. Adventure remake, starring James Belushi and Simon Westaway.

Ransom (1996) ITV4 10:30pm-12:55am
An airline tycoon is wary of involving the police when his nine-year-old son is abducted but co-operates with their plan to make a ransom drop. However, when the trade-off goes badly wrong, he decides to take matters into his own hands by placing a $2million bounty on the kidnappers’ heads, to the consternation of the cops and his anxious wife. Thriller, starring Mel Gibson, Rene Russo, Gary Sinise, Delroy Lindo and Liev Schreiber.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember it’s never too late to start a new habit or routine. Start now and it will only get easier.