SATURDAY 28th September
Shrek the Third (2007) Film4 12:50pm-2:40pm
The bad-tempered ogre finds himself in the unwelcome position of being next in line for the throne. Preferring to stay at home in the swamps, he sets out on a quest to find the rightful heir – a rebellious teenager named Artie – and persuade him to face up to his responsibilities as the future king. Meanwhile, the ambitious Prince Charming sees his chance to take the throne. Animated comedy, with the voices of Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, Justin Timberlake, Eddie Murphy, Antonio Banderas and Rupert Everett.
Thunderball (1965) ITV 2:20pm-4:55pm
James Bond travels to the Bahamas on the trail of two nuclear warheads stolen from a British aircraft. The lethal weapons have fallen into the hands of international crime syndicate Spectre, which plans to fire them at the US coast unless an exorbitant ransom is paid. Spy adventure, starring Sean Connery, Claudine Auger, Adolfo Celi and Lois Maxwell.
WarGames (1983) Film4 2:40pm-4:55pm
A teenager hacks into a top-secret military supercomputer, which challenges him to what he thinks is a game. However, the machine has complete control of the US nuclear arsenal, and the youngster’s actions are unwittingly pushing the world to the brink of war. Thriller, starring Matthew Broderick, Ally Sheedy, Dabney Coleman and John Wood.
Clueless (1995) Channel 5 3:20pm-5:15pm
A rich high-school student uses all her charm and financial clout to boost an awkward new pupil’s image, but soon finds she has created a monster – while her own popularity suffers in the process. Comedy inspired by Jane Austen’s Emma, starring Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy and Paul Rudd.
Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991) BBC One 6:20pm-8:30pm
English nobleman Robin of Locksley returns home from fighting in the Crusades, only to discover that his father has been murdered and his lands seized, while the local people are living in fear under the tyrannical rule of the Sheriff of Nottingham. Branded an outlaw for his defiance, he and his Moorish travelling companion go into hiding in the forest, where they recruit a group of bandits to fight for justice, protect the downtrodden, and foil the Sheriff’s plan to seize the throne while the king is away at war. Medieval action-adventure, starring Kevin Costner, Alan Rickman, Morgan Freeman, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, Christian Slater and Mike McShane.
Reign of Fire (2002) GREAT! movies 7:05pm-9:00pm
In the aftermath of decades of apocalyptic attacks by dragons, small pockets of survivors try to stave off the scaly fire-breathers. However, the meagre remains of the world’s heavy artillery are not enough to stop them, so a small group of people joins forces with a zealous dragon slayer in a final bid to save the world from destruction. Fantasy adventure, with Christian Bale and Matthew McConaughey.
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) Film4 9:00pm-11:15pm
Intrepid archaeologist Indiana Jones goes in search of the legendary Ark of the Covenant, a biblical artefact of devastating power. His quest leads him to Egypt, where the Nazis are plotting to use the Ark to further Hitler’s plans for world domination – aided by Jones’s deceitful French rival. Steven Spielberg’s action-adventure, with Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Paul Freeman and John Rhys-Davies.
Superbad (2007) Dave 9:00pm-11:30pm
Two teenage friends are on the brink of going to different colleges, so decide to mark the event by going to a party where they hope to lose their virginity. However, they have promised to supply the booze for the event, a task that proves much harder than expected because they are underage. Unfortunately, when a friend steps in to help, the situation gets even worse. Comedy, starring Jonah Hill, Michael Cera and Christopher Mintz-Plasse.
Rain Man (1988) 5STAR 11:10pm-1:55am
Brash yuppie car dealer Charlie discovers his deceased father has left the family fortune to Raymond, the autistic elder brother he never knew he had. In a bid to get his hands on the money, he tracks down and abducts Raymond – but the ensuing cross-country journey proves to be a profound learning experience. Oscar-winning drama, starring Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman, with Valeria Golino, Gerald R Molen and Jack Murdock.
End of Days (1999) ITV4 11:10pm-1:35am
A world-weary former police officer encounters the Devil himself on New Year’s Eve 1999, and is spurred into action to stop the Prince of Darkness from exploiting an innocent woman to bring about Armageddon. Supernatural thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gabriel Byrne, Robin Tunney, Rod Steiger, Kevin Pollak, CCH Pounder and Miriam Margolyes.
SUNDAY 29th September
Dumb and Dumber (1994) Channel 5 1:45pm-3:55pm
Dimwitted Rhode Island limousine driver Lloyd Christmas and his equally vacuous friend Harry Dunne embark on a disaster-fraught cross-country trip to Aspen, where they hope to reunite a briefcase with its female owner. However, the pair are unaware the case contains a $1million ransom they would have been better leaving well alone. Farrelly brothers comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Jeff Daniels, Lauren Holly, Teri Garr and Mike Starr.
Congo (1995) Channel 4 2:55pm-5:00pm
An expedition to find King Solomon’s diamond mines in the jungles of the Congo disappears without a trace. The tycoon behind the mission sends his assistant, a former CIA agent, to find out what became of the explorers – only to discover that the party met a grisly fate at the hands of a horde of vicious apes. Action-adventure based on Michael Crichton’s novel, with Dylan Walsh, Laura Linney, Tim Curry and Grant Heslov.
Transformers: The Last Knight (2017) E4 2:55pm-5:50pm
The shape-changing robots and their human allies face a confrontation with their original creator, who has brainwashed their leader and intends to save her own home planet by destroying Earth. To save the human race they must recover an ancient artefact from Arthurian legend – but their mission is threatened by old enemies as they uncover a terrible secret about the history of the world. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Mark Wahlberg, Anthony Hopkins, Gemma Chan, Stanley Tucci and John Turturro.
The Mask (1994) Channel 5 3:55pm-6:00pm
A timid bank clerk stumbles on an ancient mask, which endows whoever wears it with untold superhuman powers, unbridled self-confidence and an irresistible charm for the ladies. Unfortunately, he earns the enmity of a local gangster for daring to flirt with his girlfriend – and when the crook gets wind of the artefact’s existence, he covets the power for himself. Comic-book comedy, with Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert and Peter Greene.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) Film4 9:00pm-11:20pm
The intrepid archaeologist, with his young sidekick and a nightclub singer in tow, is stranded in India, where he takes on a mission to recover magical sacred stones from the hands of an evil cult engaged in human sacrifice and child slavery. Steven Spielberg’s action-adventure, starring Harrison Ford, Kate Capshaw, Ke Huy Quan and Amrish Puri.
MONDAY 30th September
Snoopy and Charlie Brown: The Peanuts Movie (2015) Film4 11:00am-12:45pm
The long-suffering youngster hopes his lifelong run of bad luck will come to an end when he develops a crush on a new school friend. His beloved dog has more important things to worry about, as he dreams of taking to the skies in his airborne kennel. Animated comedy, with the voices of Noah Schnapp and Bill Melendez.
Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey (1991) ITV4 12:20pm-2:15pm
The would-be heavy metal superstars face the Grim Reaper as they try to reclaim their souls from Hell, return to the land of the living and stop their robot doppelgangers from changing history. Along the way, they must also master their instruments, so they can triumph at the Battle of the Bands. Comedy sequel, starring Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter, William Sadler, Joss Ackland and George Carlin.
Vertical Limit (2000) GREAT! movies 1:35pm-4:00pm
A wildlife photographer is forced to master his fears and the elements as he leads an expedition to climb K2, the world’s second-highest mountain, on a desperate mission to rescue his estranged sister and her fellow mountaineers, who have fallen into a crevasse. Action-adventure, starring Chris O’Donnell, Bill Paxton, Scott Glenn and Robin Tunney.
Mr Bean’s Holiday (2007) ITV 1:55pm-3:35pm
The bumbling fool wins first prize in the church raffle – a trip to France and a video camera. His travels cause chaos as he disrupts a film shoot in Cannes, to the fury of its megalomaniac director, and is then accused of kidnapping a youngster. Comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Willem Dafoe, Emma de Caunes and Max Baldry.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016) ITV2 6:10pm-9:00pm
The two superheroes become aware of each other’s presence on Earth for the first time, and each disapproving of the other’s methods. A ruthless billionaire plays on their mutual mistrust to bring about their downfall, leading the heroes to face each other in a battle to the death. Action-adventure, starring Ben Affleck, Henry Cavill, Gal Gadot and Jesse Eisenberg.
Godzilla (1998) GREAT! movies 6:20pm-9:00pm
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989) Film4 9:00pm-11:35pm
The intrepid archaeologist sets out to find his estranged father, who has gone missing while searching for the Holy Grail. Once reunited, the duo team up to finish the task and locate the sacred relic before the Nazis get their hands on it. The action-adventure sequel directed by Steven Spielberg, the third instalment in the successful franchise. Harrison Ford stars as the titular hero, alongside Sean Connery, Alison Doody, River Phoenix, Julian Glover and Denholm Elliott.
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) GREAT! movies classic 9:00pm-10:55pm
A velvet-clad, sex-crazed secret agent from the 1960s agrees to be put into a state of suspended animation after his arch-enemy escapes justice. Thirty years later he is defrosted to do battle with the power-mad villain again, but the mission proves nearly as daunting for him as getting to grips with 1990s social values. Spoof spy adventure, with Mike Myers, Elizabeth Hurley, Mimi Rogers, Michael York and Robert Wagner.
Jaws 3 (1983) ITV4 10:45pm-12:55am
A shark is captured by divers and put on display in a Florida marine centre, where it ultimately dies. However, examination of the body reveals the seemingly fully-grown shark was actually a baby – and its enormous, ferocious mother soon comes looking for it. Thriller sequel, originally released in cinemas in 3D, starring Dennis Quaid, Simon MacCorkindale, Louis Gossett Jr and Bess Armstrong.
Whatever you’re up to this weekend, always look out for the pointy bit.