The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 249

Crisps and dip at the ready! It’s another retro movie filled weekend folks. Let’s tuck in…

Like many of you retro movie lovers in the land, we spend a lot of our time waiting for a special delivery. Sometimes it’s some classic retro 80s clothing, sometimes it’s that new tap you’re had to replace (exciting!), however sometimes, juuuust sometimes it’s something a whole lot more amazing and wondiferous! When it arrives, you’re so excited and relieved that you completely forget all the drama, heartache and frustration that came in the moments before. Being completely overwhelmed with emotions and joy at the sight of your shiny new thing and what it will mean. Some deliveries are good, some a great and some are simply the best things ever…

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 8th July

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Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002) ITV 10:20am-1:20pm (3 hours)
The young wizard and his friends return for their second term at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to discover a strange serpentine power is petrifying the other students. Meanwhile, Harry is haunted by a sinister voice in his head urging him to uncover the dark force that is stalking the corridors of the school. Fantasy adventure sequel, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson and Kenneth Branagh.

Harry Potter Merchandise

Michael (1996) 5STAR 11:25am-1:35pm
Two tabloid journalists and a theological expert investigate reports of an angel living in a remote town. They discover the stories are true, but find the heavenly being has a remarkable fondness for earthly pleasures – and as they travel back across America to present him to their editor, their lives change in unexpected ways. Fantasy comedy, starring John Travolta, Andie MacDowell, William Hurt and Bob Hoskins.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986) E4 3:00pm-5:00pm (2 hours)
A cocky teenager plays truant from school and spends the day dragging his girlfriend and a reluctant friend into all manner of crazy adventures in the big city – while the school’s dean of students vows to stop at nothing to prove the youngster is faking illness. Comedy, starring Matthew Broderick, Mia Sara, Alan Ruck, Jennifer Grey, Jeffrey Jones and Charlie Sheen.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off T-Shirts

Men in Black (1997) Film4 4:40pm-6:35pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A streetwise cop is enlisted by a top-secret government force dedicated to policing alien visitors to Earth, teaming up with a veteran agent just as a body-swapping extraterrestrial giant insect begins a reign of terror throughout New York City. Sci-fi comedy, starring Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Linda Fiorentino, Rip Torn and Vincent D’Onofrio.

Dirty Dancing (1987) 5STAR 4:55pm-7:00pm
A dance instructor at a 1960s resort hotel fears his career will be jeopardised when his regular partner is forced to pull out of an important show in which they are due to perform. Luckily, a naive teenager is happy to step in, and is treated to a whirlwind holiday education in life, love and expressing herself. Romantic drama, starring Patrick Swayze, Jennifer Grey and Jerry Orbach.

Switchback (1997) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:25pm
A hitch-hiker accepts a ride with a former rail worker, and the pair end up in a Texas city where a murder has just been committed. The local sheriff and an FBI agent are already on the case, but as the investigation hots up, it becomes clear that one of the four is responsible for the crime. Thriller, starring Dennis Quaid, Danny Glover, Jared Leto and R Lee Ermey.

Die Hard 2 (1990) E4 9:00pm-11:25pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife, but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton.

Fun Fact: Renny Harlin made sure that the scene where Major Grant says to McClane that he is “the wrong guy in the wrong place at the wrong time”, with McClane responding “Yeah, story of my life”, ended up in the movie’s trailer, because it perfectly summed up McClane’s character.

Training Day (2001) Dave 11:00pm-1:20am (2 hours 20 minutes)
A cop embarks on his first day in narcotics, partnering a seasoned officer whose willingness to flout the rules forces him to question everything he has learnt. As they resort to extreme measures to crack a case, the rookie is left battling his conscience in a dangerous situation. Thriller, starring Denzel Washington, Ethan Hawke, Scott Glenn and Tom Berenger.

SUNDAY 9th July

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Fly Away Home (1996) Sony Movie Channel 1:30pm-3:50pm
A 13-year-old girl finds an abandoned nest of goose eggs and raises the chicks when they hatch. As winter approaches, the birds need to fly south, so she and her inventor father construct a light aircraft to lead the way. Family adventure, starring Jeff Daniels, Anna Paquin, Dana Delany and Terry Kinney.

Moonraker (1979) ITV 3:30pm-6:00pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
James Bond’s investigations into the mysterious disappearance of a space shuttle lead him to a sinister industrialist, who is plotting to wipe out most of the human race. The secret agent also faces a rematch with his old enemy, metal-toothed hitman Jaws. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Michael Lonsdale, Richard Kiel and Lois Chiles.

101 Dalmatians (1996) E4 6:00pm-8:00pm (2 hours)
Wicked fashion designer Cruella De Vil steals a huge litter of newborn Dalmatian puppies to turn into a magnificent coat – but the lucky pups have many four-legged friends who are determined the evil woman and her cronies will get their just deserts. Disney’s live-action remake of the animated comedy adventure, starring Glenn Close, Jeff Daniels, Joely Richardson, Hugh Laurie and Mark Williams.

Disney Clothing UK

Jaws (1975) ITV4 9:00pm-11:40pm
A New England seaside town’s tourist season is turned into a nightmare by a giant killer shark. The local police chief’s efforts to protect the public are thwarted by the greedy mayor, forcing him to join forces with a grizzled fisherman and a marine biologist to hunt and kill the monster predator. Steven Spielberg’s thriller, starring Roy Scheider, Richard Dreyfuss and Robert Shaw.

Jaws TShirts

Sleepless in Seattle (1993) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:15pm
A widowed father is coping badly with his wife’s death, but his son is convinced that what he really needs is some new romance in his life. He arranges for his dad to go on a radio phone-in show, and his touching story moves a reporter to respond, even though she is already engaged. She returns to her fiancée, but the boy, certain she is the woman for his father, plots to bring them together. Romantic comedy, with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember it’s better to be over and under prepared.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 233

Great balls of fire! Another weekend, another retro movie rundown.

With great gusts and great gales, the wild weather beats and howls at the windows. Hearing the thrashing of the branches and the hollow scrapes of the bins, we’ll tuck ourselves in for another night amongst the safety of the sofa and warm glow of the box. Peeping out the window only to observe the chaos and fury of the outside world, before heading back to view the retro movie wonders that will once again be beaming their way into our little world.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 25th FEBRUARY

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Muppets from Space
(1999) Sony Channel 9:00am-10:50am (1 hour 50 minutes)
Gonzo hits the road with pal Rizzo in tow and goes in search of his roots – only to make the amazing discovery that his parents belonged to a race of aliens. He then has to choose whether to board a UFO and return to his family, or stay with the friends he knows and loves. Family comedy, with F Murray Abraham, David Arquette, Ray Liotta, Andie MacDowell and Rob Schneider alongside the puppets.

The Muppets Merchandise

Free Willy 2: The Adventure Home (1995) ITV 12:00pm-1:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The friendly whale is reunited with Jesse, the boy who saved him from captivity. Jesse and his younger half-brother Elvis take time out from a family holiday to help save Willy and his pod from the danger posed by oil spilling from a crippled tanker. Family adventure, starring Jason James Richter, Michael Madsen, August Schellenberg and Francis Capra.

Harry and the Hendersons (1987) 5STAR 2:55pm-5:05pm
A hapless family’s camping holiday in the mountains is brought to a sudden end when they accidentally hit the legendary Bigfoot with their car. They decide to adopt the endearing creature, but have more trouble than expected trying to keep him concealed and to avoid arousing their neighbours’ suspicions. Comedy, starring John Lithgow, Melinda Dillon, David Suchet, Don Ameche and Kevin Peter Hall.

Cutthroat Island (1995) 12:55pm-3:15pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A tough female pirate enlists the help of an educated slave in finding the three parts of a map leading to buried treasure. However, one of the pieces is in the hands of her cruel uncle, and she also has to find the loot before her crew mutinies or the British Navy catches up with her. Swashbuckling adventure, starring Geena Davis, Matthew Modine, Frank Langella and Maury Chaykin.

Dirty Dancing (1987) 5STAR 5:05pm-7:10pm
A dance instructor at a 1960s resort hotel fears his career will be jeopardised when his regular partner is forced to pull out of an important show in which they are due to perform. Luckily, a naive teenager is happy to step in, and is treated to a whirlwind holiday education in life, love and expressing herself. Romantic drama, starring Patrick Swayze, Jennifer Grey and Jerry Orbach.

American Pie (1999) ITV2 9:00pm-11:00pm
Four teenage boys make a solemn pact to lose their virginity before the high-school prom, and though their antics cause them huge embarrassment and public humiliation, the friends also learn about love and affection in their relations with the opposite sex. Coming-of-age comedy, starring Jason Biggs, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Klein, Alyson Hannigan, Mena Suvari, Seann William Scott and Eugene Levy.

Red Heat (1988) ITV4 11:00pm-1:05am
A Russian detective travels to America to oversee the extradition of a Georgian drug baron responsible for supplying cocaine in Moscow. He is teamed up with a hostile Chicago cop, but when their prisoner kills an officer and escapes, they put aside their mutual mistrust to bring him to justice. Action thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Belushi, Peter Boyle, Laurence Fishburne and Ed O’Ross.

SUNDAY 26th FEBRUARY

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Matilda
(1996) Sony Movie Channel 11:30am-1:40pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

Roald Dahl Clothing

Dragnet (1987) Dave 2:50pm-5:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A by-the-book Los Angeles cop is paired with a laidback new partner to investigate the nefarious activities of a TV evangelist and a pornographic-magazine baron suspected of operating a criminal cult. Comedy spoof of the 1950s TV series, starring Dan Aykroyd, Tom Hanks, Christopher Plummer and the original show’s star Harry Morgan.

Jumanji (1995) Sony Movie Channel 3:55pm-6:05pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A man who has been trapped inside a mysterious jungle board game for 26 years is eventually freed when two children start to play it. Unfortunately, he arrives with a rampaging horde of animals on his heels, leaving only one solution – to finish the game he started all those years ago. Fantasy adventure, starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst and Bonnie Hunt.

101 Dalmatians (1996) Channel 4 4:30pm-6:30pm (2 hours)
Wicked fashion designer Cruella De Vil steals a huge litter of newborn Dalmatian puppies to turn into a magnificent coat – but the lucky pups have many four-legged friends who are determined the evil woman and her cronies will get their just deserts. Disney’s live-action remake of the animated comedy adventure, starring Glenn Close, Jeff Daniels, Joely Richardson, Hugh Laurie and Mark Williams.

Disney Merchandise

The Fifth Element (1997) Channel 5 6:00pm-8:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
In the 23rd century, the world faces destruction from a seemingly unstoppable force of pure evil. Meanwhile, a New York cab driver encounters a mysterious woman destined to save the Earth from its fate, and has to protect her from a scheming arms dealer and a horde of alien mercenaries. Luc Besson’s sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis, Milla Jovovich and Gary Oldman.

Kindergarten Cop (1990) ITV2 6:45pm-9:00pm
A tough detective is forced to pose as a preschool teacher in a bid to capture a drug dealer whose son is one of the pupils. However, his biggest challenge turns out to be controlling a class full of five-year-olds. Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Penelope Ann Miller, Linda Hunt, Pamela Reed and Richard Tyson.

Braveheart (1995) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-12:45am (3 hours 45 minutes)
Account of the life of medieval Scottish hero William Wallace. After the slaughter of his father and brother, young Wallace is taken in by his uncle, who teaches him how to use not only his brawn but his brain – which he employs to great effect years later when he resolves to drive the English out of Scotland. Oscar-winning historical epic, directed by and starring Mel Gibson. With Patrick McGoohan, Sophie Marceau and Catherine McCormack.

Total Recall (1990) ITV4 10:00pm-12:15am
A construction worker pays to have fake memories of a dream holiday implanted into his brain, but discovers his mind has already been tampered with – apparently to erase his true identity as a secret agent from a colony on Mars. He journeys to the planet in search of the truth, but is drawn into a conflict between the tyrannical ruler and a rebel faction. Paul Verhoeven’s sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rachel Ticotin and Michael Ironside.

Clear and Present Danger (1994) Channel 4 11:00pm-1:30am (2 hours 30 minutes)
A CIA analyst gets caught up in the Colombian drug trade while trying to track down terrorists responsible for the murder of a close friend of the US president – but his investigations point to illegal activity and corruption at the very top of government. Action thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, with Harrison Ford reprising his role from Patriot Games alongside Willem Dafoe, Anne Archer and James Earl Jones.

The Terminator (1984) Channel 5 11:15pm-1:15am (2 hours)
A cyborg assassin is sent on a murderous mission back in time to the 20th century, where he wreaks havoc while searching for his intended victim – a woman whose unborn son is destined to lead the human race in a war against machines. However, a soldier has also been sent from the future to protect her. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton and Michael Biehn.

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) ITV4 12:15am-2:15am
A crook and his unhinged brother take a preacher’s family hostage and cross the border into Mexico. They head to a rough strip club to make a planned rendezvous with a third party – but they soon have to live on their wits when they realise that the establishment’s staff are vampires. Horror, starring George Clooney, Harvey Keitel, Quentin Tarantino, Juliette Lewis and Salma Hayek.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember it’s better to buy more before you run and that sometimes even the smallest changes can make the biggest difference.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 229

Sweet honey and pancakes! Must be time for another retro movie weekend!

With a swish and a swoosh, we’re making quick work of the almost herculean task of freshly painting a black canvas of a room (we said almost). Starting at one corner, we’ll watch the fresh, bright new colour explode outwards with each new stroke of the brush as we breathe a whole new character to a once tired and uninspiring space. With the smell of newness and change in the air, we’ll step back from our work to admire our new creation before taking a moment to capture our achievements onto celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 28th JANUARY

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Gold
(1974) Channel 5 11:25am-1:50pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A South African engineer is appointed general manager of a gold mine, and exposes a conspiracy to boost the price of the ore by drilling into an underground lake beneath where the company is digging, causing a devastating flood. Action adventure based on a novel by Wilbur Smith, starring Roger Moore, Susannah York, Ray Milland, Bradford Dillman and John Gielgud.

101 Dalmatians (1996) 5STAR 2:50pm-5:00pm
Wicked fashion designer Cruella De Vil steals a huge litter of newborn Dalmatian puppies to turn into a magnificent coat – but the lucky pups have many four-legged friends who are determined the evil woman and her cronies will get their just deserts. Disney’s live-action remake of the animated comedy adventure, starring Glenn Close, Jeff Daniels, Joely Richardson, Hugh Laurie and Mark Williams.

Looney Tunes: Back in Action (2003) ITV2 4:05pm-5:50pm
Daffy Duck tires of playing second fiddle to Bugs Bunny, so sets off to seek his fortune. He ends up helping a would-be stuntman rescue his screen idol father, in reality a secret agent, who has been kidnapped by the deranged chairman of the Acme Corporation. Live action and animated comedy, with Brendan Fraser, Steve Martin, Timothy Dalton and Jenna Elfman.

Clueless (1995) Film4 5:05pm-6:55pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A rich high-school student uses all her charm and financial clout to boost an awkward new pupil’s image, but soon finds she has created a monster – while her own popularity suffers in the process. Comedy inspired by Jane Austen’s Emma, starring Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy and Paul Rudd.

Clueless Merchandise

Big Momma’s House (2000) 5STAR 8:30pm-10:35pm
A dedicated FBI agent will stop at nothing to catch a dangerous escaped convict, even if it means donning a fat suit and drag to pose as the obese old woman who lives across the road from the felon’s girlfriend. Comedy, with Martin Lawrence, Nia Long, Paul Giamatti, Jascha Washington, Terrence Dashon Howard and Ella Mitchell.

SUNDAY 29th JANUARY

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The Love Bug
(1968) Film4 1:00pm-3:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Herbie, an irrepressible Beetle car with a mind of its own, takes a shine to a struggling racing driver and leads him to victory on the track. However, his success attracts the attention of an unscrupulous rival competitor, who will go to any lengths to win the most important race of all. Disney comedy, starring Dean Jones, Michele Lee, Buddy Hackett and David Tomlinson.

The Borrowers (1997) Film4 3:10pm-4:50pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A family of four-inch-high people living beneath the floorboards of an ordinary human home help the owner’s son fight back when a dastardly lawyer plans to demolish the house and make way for a luxury apartment block. Children’s fantasy, starring John Goodman, Jim Broadbent, Celia Imrie, Flora Newbigin and Tom Felton.

Inspector Gadget (1999) ITV2 3:00pm-4:35pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A clumsy security guard is critically injured during a run-in with a thief, so his cybernetics-expert employer transforms him into the ultimate crime-fighting machine – a bionic officer with an array of gadgets and weaponry cunningly concealed inside his body. Disney comedy adventure based on the 1980s cartoon series, starring Matthew Broderick, Rupert Everett and Joely Fishe.

The River Wild (1994) Film4 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A headstrong white-water rafting expert embarks on a holiday with her family, but their fun comes to an abrupt end when two killers show up. The fugitives’ only escape route from the law is down a raging river, so they take the woman and her son hostage to act as guides. Meanwhile, her husband desperately tries to keep track from the riverbank, waiting for his opportunity to launch a rescue attempt. Action thriller directed by the late Curtis Hanson, with Meryl Streep, Kevin Bacon, David Strathairn and Joseph Mazzello.

X-Men (2000) E4 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
Super-powered outsiders Rogue and Wolverine find themselves at a school for mutants which is run by a benevolent psychic professor. While there, they agree to join others with similar gifts to take on a superhuman mutant terrorist faction intent on establishing dominance over mankind. Sci-fi comic-book adventure, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Anna Paquin and Halle Berry.

Superhero Merchandise

Cliffhanger (1993) ITV 10:45pm-12:45am (2 hours)
A retired mountain rescue expert is drawn into a battle of wits with a psychopathic criminal searching for a $100million fortune lost in the Rockies – and puts his life on the line as he negotiates the treacherous mountains in a bid to stay one step ahead of the crook. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, John Lithgow, Janine Turner and Michael Rooker.

Sleepy Hollow (1999) Channel 4 11:00pm-1:00am (2 hours)
A sceptical 18th-century detective is sent to a small hamlet supposedly terrorised by a demonic headless horseman who decapitates his victims. The investigator refuses to believe in the supernatural, convinced a human killer is behind the murders – but the legend proves to be all too true. Tim Burton’s gothic horror, starring Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson and Christopher Walken.

The Cider House Rules (1999) BBC2 11:30pm-1:30am (2 hours)
An orphan grows up under the wing of the doctor running the home where he lives, and helps him deliver babies to unmarried mothers and perform abortions. However, he is eager to see more of life and joins a pilot and his girlfriend on the road – but unforeseen events present him with a host of difficult personal and moral decisions. Drama, starring Michael Caine in an Oscar-winning role, with Tobey Maguire, Charlize Theron and Paul Rudd.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, always remember to hit save and don’t forget to always have spare batteries around….just in case.