Smoking tyre! It’s really another retro weekend?! So soon! Well….if you’re sure.
Like a small and nimble mountain goat (…bear with us), we find ourselves clambering up the great retro movie cliff face on our tiny but perfectly designed hooves in search of only the greatest and tastiest retro classics. We’ll hop and skip our way up and along even the most precarious of footings as we use our skill and steadfastness to pluck out some of the best and most-loved retro movie scenes for all to see.
Have a happy retro weekend!
SATURDAY 4th June
Mannequin (1987) 5STAR 12:20pm-2:10pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A struggling artist gets a job as a window dresser for a department store, only to discover one of his dummies is a reincarnated Egyptian princess who comes to life at night. As he falls for the living doll, she inspires him to transform the shop’s display and make it the most spectacular in town. Fantasy comedy, starring Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall.
The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas (2000) ITV2 1:10pm-2:10pm (1 hour) 2 parts
Young courting couples Fred and Wilma, and Barney and Betty are invited to stay at a luxury casino in the Stone Age gambling capital. Owner Chip Rockefeller is bent on stopping Fred proposing to wealthy Wilma, because he wants to marry her himself for the money and settle his debts. Family comedy prequel, with Mark Addy, Stephen Baldwin, Joan Collins, Alan Cumming, Kristen Johnston and Jane Krakowski.
Blue Streak (1999) 5STAR 2:10pm-4:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A convicted jewel thief is released from prison, and sets about recovering his hidden loot – only to discover a police station has since been built where he left it. Undeterred, he poses as a maverick cop and worms his way into the detective division – little realising his problems have only just begun. Comedy, starring Martin Lawrence, Luke Wilson and Peter Greene.
Despicable Me (2010) ITV2 4:45pm-5:45pm (1 hour) 2 parts
A criminal mastermind hopes to seal his reputation as the greatest villain of them all by stealing the moon. First he needs to get his hands on a shrinking ray owned by a rival evil genius, and adopts three orphan girls to help him – but finds that fatherhood brings out his long-buried caring side. Animated comedy, with the voices of Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand and Julie Andrews.
Alice in Wonderland (2010) BBC2 8:30pm-10:10pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A 19-year-old Alice returns to the magical land, having forgotten her previous adventures. She finds the tyrannical Red Queen has begun a reign of terror that can only be ended by slaying the monstrous Jabberwocky – a task she is seemingly destined to attempt. Tim Burton’s fantasy adventure based on Lewis Carroll’s novels, starring Mia Wasikowska, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter and Anne Hathaway.
Alice in Wonderland Merchandise
Predator (1987) E4 9:00pm-11:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
An elite military team takes on a top-secret mission in the jungles of Central America, but the soldiers realise they have been deceived by their CIA employers. A greater danger presents itself when they are stalked by a lethal alien big-game hunter with the power to become invisible, that has come to Earth to stalk human prey. Sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Carl Weathers and Bill Duke.
Die Hard with a Vengeance (1995) BBC1 10:45pm-12:45am (2 hours)
New York cop John McClane returns to duty following an explosion at a department store in the city. The perpetrator contacts the police and tells them that unless McClane and an unfortunate bystander who was in the wrong place at the wrong time carry out a series of instructions to the letter, more bombs will be detonated. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Samuel L Jackson and Jeremy Irons.
SUNDAY 5th June
Doc Hollywood (1991) ITV3 7:55am-8:55am (1 hour) 2 parts
An arrogant doctor on his way to California causes an accident in a rural South Carolina town and is sentenced to community service at the local hospital. Initially desperate to leave, he gradually comes to appreciate a slower pace of life. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, Julie Warner, Woody Harrelson, Bridget Fonda and George Hamilton.
See No Evil, Hear No Evil (1989) Channel 5 12:00pm-1:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A blind man and his deaf friend go on the run to clear themselves of a trumped-up murder charge. However, all kinds of oddball characters are on their trail, determined to get hold of a top-secret microchip that the duo do not realise they have. Comedy, starring Richard Pryor, Gene Wilder, Kevin Spacey, Joan Severance, Alan North and Anthony Zerbe.
Beethoven (1992) ITV2 1:05pm-2:05pm (1 hour) 2 parts
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.
Spies Like Us (1985) Channel 5 1:50pm-3:45pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Two incompetent US State Department officials are unwittingly used as decoys on a deadly mission to thwart Soviet activity in Pakistan. Unfortunately, their involvement in such a delicate operation brings the world to the brink of nuclear war. Comedy, starring Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, Steve Forrest, Bruce Davison and Donna Dixon.
Wayne’s World (1992) Channel 5 3:45pm-5:35pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Two heavy-metal fans broadcast an amateur TV programme from their basement. A slimy network executive offers them the chance to turn professional, but as they enjoy the perks of wealth and fame, they find their show being ruined by corporate interference. Comedy, starring Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Rob Lowe, Tia Carrere and Lara Flynn Boyle, with a cameo by Alice Cooper.
Addams Family Values (1993) Film4 4:50pm-6:35pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Spooky couple Gomez and Morticia hire a nanny to look after their new baby son – and stop him suffering an early death at the hands of his jealous elder siblings. Romance soon blossoms between the new childminder and Uncle Fester, but he does not realise she is planning to kill him once she has got hold of the family fortune. Comedy sequel, starring Anjelica Huston, Raul Julia, Christopher Lloyd, Christina Ricci and Joan Cusack.
The Jungle Book (1967) Channel 4 5:05pm-6:35pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
A boy is raised by animals in the jungle, leading a carefree life with his friends, a laidback bear and a wise panther. The return of a ferocious tiger who hates humans places the youngster’s life in danger, and his friends must persuade him to return to the safety of his own people. Disney animated adventure based on Rudyard Kipling’s stories, with the voices of Phil Harris and George Sanders.
The Jungle Book Merchandise
Mission: Impossible 2 (2000) Film4 6:35pm-9:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Secret agent Ethan Hunt sent to find and destroy the only sample of a deadly man-made virus. However, he faces tough opposition in a former spy-turned-criminal mastermind who has already acquired the cure and now wants the pathogen itself. Director John Woo’s action thriller sequel, starring Tom Cruise, Dougray Scott, Thandie Newton and Anthony Hopkins.
Zoolander (2001) Dave 7:10pm-9:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Dim male model Derek Zoolander is stunned to find his career going downhill thanks to the arrival of an equally vacuous rival – but fails to realise he is merely a pawn in a dangerous game of international espionage and world domination. Comedy, starring Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Will Ferrell, Milla Jovovich, Christine Taylor and David Duchovny.
Whatever you’re up to this weekend,don’t forget the washing up and remember to always check both ways first.