The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown – 346

It’s here! Quietly swimming towards us like a great big blue whale, another movie backed weekend is upon us. Bringing countless classic tales, action, drama and plenty of adventure, we are sure there will be plenty to keep you guys sorted!

SATURDAY 7th September

While You Were Sleeping (1995) Sony Movie Channel 4:35pm-6:40pm
A lonely train-station attendant saves the life of a man she has been in love with from afar. He ends up comatose in the hospital, where she is mistakenly introduced to his family as his fiancee. For a while, she decides to keep up the pretence – but comes to regret the deceit when she begins to fall for her supposed partner’s brother. Romantic comedy, starring Sandra Bullock, Bill Pullman and Peter Gallagher.

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) 5STAR 6:10pm-8:00pm
The eccentric pet detective is coaxed out of self-imposed exile in a Buddhist monastery to visit Africa and help search for a sacred white bat. However, his unique investigative talents are tested to the limits as he faces a race against time to find the missing creature and prevent a tribal war. Comedy sequel, starring Jim Carrey, Simon Callow and Bob Gunton.

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Total Recall
(2012) While You Were Sleeping 6:40pm-9:00pm
A man living in a bleak future years after a nuclear war has fake memories of being a secret agent implanted into his brain. However, the procedure uncovers the fact that he really is a spy with his memory erased, and he is forced to become a fugitive from the totalitarian government. Sci-fi thriller remake, with Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel.
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The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 275

It’s SNOOOOOW! With what seems like the entire world now nicely dusted on soft while playful goodness, it’s the perfect time to take some time and enjoy the finer things in life. Be it a nice walk, a hut cuppa, or even just sitting back and tucking into some of your old but still favourite movies. We know we love that one! Take a peep at some of our top picks hitting the small screen this weekend. Enjoy!

SATURDAY 3rd MARCH

First Knight (1995) Sony Movie Channel 9:10am-12:00pm
A wandering swordsman is knighted for his fighting prowess at the court of King Arthur and his wife, Lady Guinevere. However, the new knight and the queen develop a dangerous and secret attraction for each other, while a neighbouring warlord threatens the downfall of the kingdom. Adventure, starring Richard Gere, Sean Connery, Julia Ormond and Ben Cross.

Stuart Little (1999) 11:20am-1:00pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
An American couple decide their son needs a brother, and plan to adopt another child – but when they get to the orphanage they are greeted by a charming talking mouse named Stuart, who fits the bill perfectly. However, their jealous cat hatches a plot to get rid of the new arrival. Comedy adventure, starring Geena Davis and Hugh Laurie, with the voice of Michael J Fox.

Field of Dreams (1989) Film4 1:00pm-3:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A farmer hears a mysterious voice inspiring him to mark out a baseball diamond in a cornfield – which, to his surprise, is visited by the ghost of the star player of the 1919 Chicago White Sox team, whose career was cut short by scandal. It later dawns on him the pitch has a greater purpose – to give people who have sacrificed important parts of their lives a second chance. Fantasy, starring Kevin Costner, Ray Liotta, Burt Lancaster and James Earl Jones.

A Knight’s Tale (2001) 5STAR 4:30pm-7:05pm
A poverty-stricken squire spies an opportunity to make his dreams come true when his employer dies. He takes his place as a knight, launching himself on the road to riches by competing in jousting tournaments, but his ruse is jeopardised by a dastardly nobleman. Comedy adventure, starring Heath Ledger, Paul Bettany, Mark Addy, Shannyn Sossamon and Rufus Sewell.

Uncle Buck (1989) ITV2 7:00pm-9:00pm
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

Far and Away (1992) Sony Movie Channel 6:05pm-9:00pm
Penniless Irish farmer Joseph seeks revenge on the cruel landowner who drove him from his home. However, the landlord’s daughter, desperate to escape her family, persuades him to join her in seeking their fortune in America. The pair plan to stake a claim in the Oklahoma gold rush, but instead Joseph is forced to become a bare-knuckle fighter to support them. Romantic drama set in the 1890s, starring Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.

Batman Begins (2005) 9:00pm-11:50pm
Billionaire Bruce Wayne travels the world seeking the means to fight injustice, consumed with rage over his parents’ murder. Trained by a secret society, he hones his fighting skills and returns to his home city of Gotham on a mission to rid it of crime and corruption in the guise of a masked vigilante. Comic-book adventure, exploring the origins of the Dark Knight, with Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Liam Neeson, Cillian Murphy, Gary Oldman and Katie Holmes.

Batman Merchandise

Cocktail (1988) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:20pm
An ambitious bartender and his mentor become the talk of New York before their differences drive them apart. Relocating in Jamaica, the barman is torn between the waitress he loves and a wealthy older woman who can make his dreams of running his own establishment come true. Drama, starring Tom Cruise, Bryan Brown, Elisabeth Shue and Lisa Banes.

Predator (1987) Channel 4 11:00pm-1:00am (2 hours)
An elite military team takes on a top-secret mission in the jungles of Central America, but the soldiers realise they have been deceived by their CIA employers. A greater danger presents itself when they are stalked by a lethal alien big-game hunter with the power to become invisible, that has come to Earth to stalk human prey. Sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Carl Weathers and Bill Duke.

A Few Good Men (1992) Sony Movie Channel 11:20pm-2:15am
Two marines based in Cuba stand accused of murdering a comrade-in-arms. Three Navy lawyers working on their defence unearth evidence that the soldiers may have been acting under orders, which points to a trail of corruption leading all the way to a top-ranking officer. Drama based on Aaron Sorkin’s stage play, starring Tom Cruise, Demi Moore, Kevin Pollack, Jack Nicholson, Kiefer Sutherland and Kevin Bacon.

SUNDAY 4th MARCH

Wyatt Earp (1994) Channel 5 12:50pm-4:25pm (3 hours 35 minutes)
The life of the legendary lawman, from his early youth to his days as the feared and respected deputy town marshal of Tombstone who is best known for his part in the gunfight at the OK Corral, a tragic confrontation with a notorious outlaw gang. Western, starring Kevin Costner, Dennis Quaid, Gene Hackman, Michael Madsen, Isabella Rossellini, Bill Pullman and Catherine O’Hara.

The Flintstones (1994) ITV2 3:05pm-4:50pm
Blue-collar caveman Fred Flintstone is promoted to an executive position at work and unwittingly becomes embroiled in an embezzlement scheme – thanks in no small part to his seductive new assistant. Live-action version of the cartoon comedy, starring John Goodman, Rick Moranis, Rosie O’Donnell, Halle Berry and Elizabeth Taylor.

The Dirty Dozen (1967) Channel 5 4:25pm-7:20pm
An uncompromising major is placed in charge of a seemingly suicidal mission to destroy a French chateau being used as a base by Nazi officers. Needing tough but expendable soldiers for the task, he recruits 12 hardened criminals from a military prison. Second World War action adventure, starring Lee Marvin, Telly Savalas, Ernest Borgnine, Charles Bronson and Donald Sutherland.

Crocodile Dundee (1986) Film4 4:50pm-6:45pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A New York reporter searches the Australian Outback for a maverick hunter with a legendary reputation, and invites the adventurer back to America. But the die-hard Aussie needs to draw on all his survival skills to adjust to life in the urban jungle. Comedy adventure, written by and starring Paul Hogan, with Linda Kozlowski, John Meillon and Mark Blum.

Good Morning, Vietnam (1987) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:40pm
A fast-talking US Army disc jockey is sent to entertain the GIs in 1960s Saigon, but he enrages the military top brass by blasting the airwaves with his irreverent and controversial view of the conflict in South-East Asia. Comedy drama, starring Robin Williams, Forest Whitaker and Bruno Kirby.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, wear one more pair of socks than you’re thinking and remember that a flask of tea can make of break even just a walk to the shops. Enjoy!

I’m Batman….

I have come to the conclusion that I was born with a genetic obsession for everything Batman. If I thought I could get away with living in a cave and running round dressed as a giant bat I think I would.

The obsession all started with me running around as a little lad with a coat hanging off the back of my head, singing nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana Batman which back then, was enough to convince me that I too could be a superhero. I blame it on Adam West’s 60’s Batman spoof T.V series which first introduced me to the adventures of the caped crusader! For those of you who don’t remember or need a reminder, check out this hilarious vid I found!

I don’t remember Batman having such sweet dance moves…… Hypnotic and equally creepy at the same time – he shakes a pretty mean cape I think you’ll agree!

I have to say though that back then, little old me thought Mr West was quite the bada$$ and I was well jealous of all the gadgets and anti- bat this, bat-that even bat thermal underwear and the most awesome Bat-Mobile that ever was, even by today’s standards.

My love for Batman continued throughout my childhood – through all his various incarnations. There have been several Batman’s….um Batmen since Micheael Keaton who stared in Tim Burton’s gothic vision of the Batman! Val Kilmer and even George Cooney also got involved which I actually forgot about (not that I could ever forget Alicia Silverstone as Batgirl – insert pervy groan noise here.) In my humble opinion though, there’s no truer representative to Bob Kane’s original vision of the Dark Knight than Christian Bale who comes the closest to portraying what Batman should be – dark, moody, a loner and a little bit mental. Having seen his parents murdered in front of him and living a life a seclusion, dedicating every waking hour to mastering martial arts and all the while planning vengeance would leave any man a little twisted, even if he is a billionaire. Part justice seeking detective and part nightmare of the underworld – if anything Batman is as screwed up as any of the villains he fights against.

I was also a big fan of the comic series and in my early teens I tried to read every Batman comic I could get my grubby nerdy little mitts on. At the time, a story called Knight fall was the big thing, starring  a super villain called Bane who hatched a plan to break out every insane villain of Arkham Asylum, home of the criminally insane leaving our hero Batman to round up these nut jobs including the Joker and many others until he reached near exhaustion. Anyone else remember it?

Stretched to his mortal limits and being awake nearly 24/7 – Batman finally came face to face with the steroid (well “venom”) induced criminal mastermind Bane and in one epic battle, Bane gained the upper hand and delivered a devastating backbreaker, crippling Batman and leaving him paralyzed. Needless to say it was sad day and the first time ever Batman had actually been beaten – I liked it because  it forced you to stop thinking of Batman as a super hero and realize that at the end of the day, he’s just a man.

So what next for the insanely popular Batman franchise? Well – it’s a fair old while away but The Dark Knight Rises is coming to the big screen and is due for release on July 20th next year. Fair to say – I’m pretty excited! Christian Bale  will reprise his dual role as Batman/Bruce Wayne and he will be re-joined by Michael Caine as Alfred, Gary Oldman as Commissioner Gordon and Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox. Personally, I can’t wait to see how Christopher Nolan will portray Bane – played by Tom Hardy. Hopefully he’ll do the bad ass super megalomaniac justice! Plus there’s the added bonus of Selina Kyle aka Catwoman – played by Anne Hathaway. Looking forward to seeing how she’ll compare to Batman Returns Michelle Pfeiffer and the completely forgettable Halle Berry.

If all that take has wet your appetite as much as it has mine, check out the trailer below….

So what do we think? To be honest, I’m not sure what to expect and I don’t want to hype it up too much in my head being that it’s a while off yet. So in the meantime, I’m going home to my Bat cave to read knight fall whilst  wearing my Batman t-shirts and drinking from my Batman mugs. I’m even going to put on my Bat Underpants and Bat socks and talk in a husky voice like Batman! I’m going to hide behind people in the shadows and when they turn around I would have already gone. I might even wear a cape! See – told you I was Batman!

Tune in next time folks – same bat time same bat channel.

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