The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 93

Thar she blows! It can only be the Weekend!

So like a mid eighteenth century Whaling vessel let us be your sea hardened, weather beaten, bearded captain with a stern but fair persona. As we sail hard heartedly across vast oceans of retro movie mayhem, we’ll peer one eyed through our brass telescope for the elusive humped back of cinematic greatness before we thrust our long and rusty harpoons into the salty meaty flesh of celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 5th APRIL

Crocodile Dundee (1986) Film4 1:00 pm-2:50 pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A New York reporter searches the Australian Outback for a maverick hunter with a legendary reputation, and invites the adventurer back to America. But the die-hard Aussie needs to draw on all his survival skills to adjust to life in the urban jungle. Comedy adventure, written by and starring Paul Hogan, with Linda Kozlowski, John Meillon and Mark Blum. Edited for daytime broadcast.

Twins (1988) ITV London 12:30 pm-2:30 pm (2 hours )
An unlikely pair of brothers, who were born as the result of a one-off genetic experiment and separated at birth, are reunited in adulthood. They set out on a cross-country search for their unknown mother – fending off vicious loan sharks and a professional assassin along the way. Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, Kelly Preston and Chloe Webb.

Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986) 5* 3:15 pm-4:55 pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Facing closure from cutbacks in public spending and competition from a more successful academy, the police training school calls on its bungling graduates to act as instructors and make good officers out of a bunch of new recruits even more incompetent than they are. Comedy sequel, starring Steve Guttenberg, Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow and Art Metrano.

There’s Something About Mary (1998) E4 9:00 pm-11:25 pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A lovelorn man hires a sleazy private eye to track down his high-school sweetheart in the hope of rekindling their brief relationship. By unfortunate coincidence, the detective also falls for her, and then it emerges there are even more men out there competing for her affections. Comedy from the Farrelly brothers, starring Cameron Diaz, Ben Stiller, Matt Dillon and Lee Evans.

SUNDAY 6th APRIL

The Jewel of the Nile (1985) Sky2 11:45 am-2:00 pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A novelist travels to the Middle East to become a sheik’s official biographer, only to end up being held hostage by him. Her lover joins forces with an old enemy to rescue her, but they get drawn into the hunt for a mysterious ancient treasure that has a connection to an eccentric holy man. Comedy adventure sequel to Romancing the Stone, starring Michael Douglas, Kathleen Turner and Danny DeVito

Casper (1995) ITV2 1:30 pm-3:35 pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A paranormal expert moves into a haunted house where his daughter befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy – but things start to go awry when three smelly spooks and two dastardly crooks try to chase the new residents away. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci, Bill Pullman, Eric Idle, Cathy Moriarty and featuring the voice of Malachi Pearson.

Hairspray (2007) Channel 4 3:25 pm-5:40 pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Musical remake of the comedy about Tracy, an overweight teenager in 1960s Baltimore, who dreams of appearing on a TV dance show. However, a jealous rival and her scheming mother are determined to destroy her ambition – especially when Tracy tries to fight racism in the community. Starring Nikki Blonsky, Michelle Pfeiffer, Christopher Walken, James Marsden, Queen Latifah and John Travolta in drag as the heroine’s mother.

Die Hard 2 (1990) Film4 9:00 pm-11:20 pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton.

Whatever you get up to this Weekend remember check behind your ears for spuds and all ways enjoy yourselves.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 84!

By the rivers of Babylon, not another weekend!

As the distinct twang of a hammer hitting a bell repeatedly sounds off to signify the start of art and crafts time. Let us put our nimble fingers to work as we mould out of plasticine for you mega movie magic, we’ll glue together toilet roll tubes and breakfast cereal boxes and cover them with cinematic joyousness before we stand back with proud bewilderment and glee at our masterpiece we call celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 25th JANURAY

The Three Musketeers (1993) More4  11:05am-1:10pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The king of France’s elite personal guard is disbanded, but three of them refuse to lay down their swords. Aided by an impetuous young man keen to join their ranks, the trio set out to foil an evil cardinal’s plot to seize the throne for himself by capturing the cleric’s wily female spy. Swashbuckling comedy adventure, with Kiefer Sutherland, Charlie Sheen, Oliver Platt, Chris O’Donnell, Tim Curry and Rebecca De Mornay.

Muppets from Space (1999) Sky1  8:15pm-10:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Gonzo hits the road with pal Rizzo in tow and goes in search of his roots – only to make the amazing discovery that his parents belonged to a race of aliens. He then has to choose whether to board a UFO and return to his family, or stay with the friends he knows and loves. Family comedy, with F Murray Abraham, David Arquette, Ray Liotta, Andie MacDowell and Rob Schneider alongside the puppets.

Men's Grey Marl Old School Waldorf And Statler Muppets T-Shirt
Men's Old School Waldorf And Statler Muppets T-Shirt

Muppets Playing Cards
Muppets Playing Cards

Starsky & Hutch (2004) GOLD  9:00pm-11:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Two mismatched detectives are forced to work together for the first time to track down a crime kingpin who has introduced a new, undetectable narcotic to the streets – but they struggle to get along. Comedy spoofing the 1970s cop show, starring Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Snoop Dogg, Vince Vaughn and Juliette Lewis.

Braveheart (1995) Film4  9:00pm-12:20am (3 hours 20 minutes)
Account of the life of medieval Scottish hero William Wallace. After the slaughter of his father and brother, young Wallace is taken in by his uncle, who teaches him how to use not only his brawn but his brain – which he employs to great effect years later when he resolves to drive the English out of Scotland. Oscar-winning historical epic, directed by and starring Mel Gibson. With Patrick McGoohan, Sophie Marceau and Catherine McCormack.

SUNDAY 26th JANUARY

Last Action Hero (1993) Sky Movies Greats  5:45pm-8:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A boy watching an action movie is transported into the film by a magic ticket and meets its hero figure, who refuses to believe he is a fictional character. Matters take a turn for the worse when the screen villain gets hold of the ticket and crosses over into the real world – where bad guys can win. Comedy adventure, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Austin O’Brien, Charles Dance, F Murray Abraham and Anthony Quinn.

Outbreak (1995) Channel 5  6:35pm-8:50pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An expert in infectious diseases races against time to find a cure for a rapidly fatal airborne virus which is wiping out the population of a small town, and is threatening to turn into a pandemic. However, his task is hampered by senior military men, who are bent on burning down the town and incinerating the virus with it, regardless of any casualties. Thriller, with Dustin Hoffman, Rene Russo, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Spacey and Donald Sutherland. Edited for language.

Kick-Ass (2010) Film4  9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A teenage comic-book fan sets out to become a real-life superhero. His amateur crime-fighting exploits make him a media sensation, but he is soon in over his head as he encounters a sadistic gangster and a father-daughter vigilante team with a far more lethal approach to cleaning up the streets. Comic-book action comedy, with Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Grace Moretz and Nicolas Cage. Shown with an introduction by director Matthew Vaughn.

Mean Girls (2004) Sky Movies Comedy  11:30pm-1:10am (1 hour 40 minutes)
A teenager is surprised when she is befriended by the girls in the most popular clique at her new school. However, a dating mishap leads to trouble and her supposed friends start to turn on her. Urged on by other pals outside their circle, the newcomer resolves to bring down the self-appointed queen of campus – only to end up adopting some of her rival’s crueller characteristics. Comedy, with Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Tina Fey and Lacey Chabert

You Can't Sit With Us Mean Girl Slogan Vest from TruffleShuffle
You Can't Sit With Us Mean Girls Vest

So Fetch Beanie
90's So Fetch Mean Girl Beanie Hat from Chelsea Doll

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember to always have a backup plan if your going to  take over the world and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 80!

Aunt Gemima’s pyjamas!  – It’s another festive weekend!
So after our festive feast of roasted turkey, Brussle sprouts, Carrots and crispy roast potatoes, let us be your rather full, partially merry but quite sleepy Grandpa as we sit back in our favourite arm chair and gently nod off to the comforting sounds of retro movie magic, we’ll dream about cinematic greatness and dribble a little tiny amount for celluloid wonder.

Have a festive retro weekend!

SATURDAY 14th DECEMBER

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004) ITV London 2:30pm-5:05pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
The teenage wizard is alarmed to learn a dangerous fugitive sorcerer is searching for him. Meanwhile, a new teacher at Hogwarts helps the bespectacled youngster to protect himself from the school’s soul-sucking security guards. The third in the fantasy adventure series, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Gary Oldman, David Thewlis, Michael Gambon, Robbie Coltrane and Alan Rickman

Ladies Purple Harry Potter I Solemnly Swear Mischief Managed T-Shirt
Ladies Purple Harry Potter I Solemnly Swear Mischief Managed T-Shirt

Men's Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone Movie Poster T-Shirt
Men's Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone Movie Poster T-Shirt

Tron (1982) BBC2 London 5:30pm-7:00pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
A computer genius hacks into the mainframe of the company he used to work for, hoping to find evidence against the executive who stole his ideas. However, the intelligent master program running the system transports him into an electronic world, where he is forced to battle gladiators in a series of deadly games. Disney sci-fi adventure, starring Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner and David Warner

Die Hard (1988) E4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom – and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) BBC3 10:00pm-11:35pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
The chauvinistic host of a top-rated American news programme in 1970s San Diego fights for his status and job security when they are threatened by the arrival of an ambitious female reporter, whose determination to become a newsreader leads to a bitter battle of the sexes. Comedy, starring Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Fred Willard and Steve Carell

Anchorman Ron Burgundy Dress Up Kit
Anchorman Ron Burgundy Dress Up Kit

Anchorman Wallet And Moustache Set
Anchorman Wallet And Moustache Set

SUNDAY 15th DECEMBER

Mean Girls (2004) Sky Movies Comedy 2:40pm-4:20pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A teenager is surprised when she is befriended by the girls in the most popular clique at her new school. However, a dating mishap leads to trouble and her supposed friends start to turn on her. Urged on by other pals outside their circle, the newcomer resolves to bring down the self-appointed queen of campus – only to end up adopting some of her rival’s crueller characteristics. Comedy, with Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Tina Fey and Lacey Chabert

You Can't Sit With Us Mean Girl Slogan Rolled Sleeve Boyfriend T-Shirt from TruffleShuffle
You Can't Sit With Us Mean Girl Slogan Rolled Sleeve Boyfriend T-Shirt from TruffleShuffle

Ladies Boo You Whore Mean Girl Curved Hem Cropped Swing Vest from TruffleShuffle
Ladies Boo You Whore Mean Girl Curved Hem Cropped Swing Vest from TruffleShuffle

Fred Claus (2007) Channel 4 5:20pm-7:30pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Santa’s selfish brother Fred has been ostracised by his family for years, but when his crooked ways land him in jail, his brother comes along to bail him out on one condition – he must return to the family business and make toys for Christmas. But instead of cleaning up his act, Fred pushes Santa’s patience to the limit with his far from festive attitude. Comedy, starring Vince Vaughn, Paul Giamatti, Rachel Weisz, Miranda Richardson and Kevin Spacey

Unisex Santa Costume Christmas Jumper from Crazy Granny Clothing
Unisex Santa Costume Christmas Jumper from Crazy Granny Clothing

City Slickers (1991) ITV4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Three middle-aged men take a break from the rat race and their mid-life crises to join a two-week cattle drive from New Mexico to Colorado. Together with a bunch of fellow urbanites, they find the going much tougher than expected, and it is down to a real-life cowboy to whip them into shape. Comedy adventure, starring Billy Crystal, Daniel Stern, Bruno Kirby and Jack Palance, who won an Oscar for his performance as grizzled trail boss Curly.

Mad Max 2 (1981) Sky Atlantic 10:15pm-12:05am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A former cop haunted by his tragic past roams the wasteland of Australia in the aftermath of a nuclear war. He arrives at a besieged settlement and grudgingly helps protect the residents from a horde of marauding bikers who want to get hold of their valuable supply of petrol. Futuristic adventure sequel, starring Mel Gibson, Bruce Spence, Vernon Wells, Emil Minty and Kjell Nilsson

Whatever you get up to this Weekend remember Santa doesn’t like liars and always stay classy….

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 72!

Hot Fudge Sundae! Is it the Weekend Already?

So like the Burger van of your dreams let us prepare for you a tasty lunch time treat with a half pound of flame grilled movie awesomeness, garnished with freshly chopped crunchy cinematic greatness all held together in a tasty oven baked sesame seed bun of celluloid glory.

Have a happy retro weekend! 🙂

SATURDAY 19th October

Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (1999)ITV London 3:00pm-5:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
Jedi Knights Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn are instructed to protect Queen Amidala when her planet is invaded. Escorting her away from danger, they meet gifted youngster Anakin Skywalker, who seems ideally suited to join the pair’s order – but is unaware of just how powerful he could become. Sci-fi prequel, starring Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman and Ray Park

Spy Hard (1996)Watch 6:10pm-7:50pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Bungling secret agent Dick Steele – code-named WD-40 – is called out of retirement to thwart a megalomaniac general bent on destroying the world with a missile he is building at his secret island lair. Spoof spy adventure, starring Leslie Nielsen, Nicollette Sheridan, Charles Durning, Marcia Gay Harden, Barry Bostwick, and featuring a cameo appearance by Ray Charles

Die Hard (1988)Channel 4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom – and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia

The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! (1988)E4 11:10pm-12:55am (1 hour 45 minutes)
While investigating the shooting of a colleague, disaster-prone police lieutenant Frank Drebin uncovers a plot to assassinate Queen Elizabeth II during her visit to Los Angeles. However, after he is sacked from the force by the mayor, the cop has to operate beneath the radar to get to the bottom of the conspiracy. Comedy, with Leslie Nielsen, Priscilla Presley and Ricardo Montalban

SUNDAY 20th October

King Kong (1976)Film4 4:25pm-7:00pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
Oil prospectors travel to a recently discovered and remote Pacific island, where they encounter a gigantic gorilla. The men manage to capture the huge ape and bring it back to America – but the confused creature is terrified by events and escapes, wreaking havoc in New York. Remake of the classic 1933 fantasy adventure, with Jeff Bridges, Jessica Lange and Charles Grodin.

The Rock (1996)Channel 5 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A renegade general and his crack team of mercenaries take over the abandoned fortress prison of Alcatraz and threaten San Francisco with toxic nerve-gas rockets to extort a massive ransom. To break their stranglehold on the city, the FBI sends in a chemical weapons expert and a jailed SAS veteran, chosen because he is the only man to have ever escaped from the infamous penitentiary. Action thriller, with Sean Connery, Nicolas Cage and Ed Harris.

Sneakers (1992)ITV4 11:20pm-1:45am (2 hours 25 minutes)
Security experts are blackmailed into stealing a sophisticated computer hacking device from its inventor. After the mission, they discover they have stolen something very dangerous and placed it in the wrong hands – so plot to steal it back. Comedy thriller, starring Robert Redford, Ben Kingsley, Dan Aykroyd, River Phoenix, Sidney Poitier, Mary McDonnell and David Strathairn.

Highlander (1986)Channel 5 11:40pm-1:55am (2 hours 15 minutes)
A 16th-century Scottish clansman discovers he is one of a race of immortal warriors who can only be killed by beheading, and who are destined to fight to the death until just one survives. Centuries later in modern-day New York, he prepares for a final showdown with his deadliest enemy. Fantasy action adventure, starring Christopher Lambert, Sean Connery, Clancy Brown and Roxanne Hart. Featuring a soundtrack by Queen

Wham Bam! Bonus movie clip time, a little something, something from the Naked gun.

Whatever you get up to this weekend, remember one of these things is not like the others and always enjoy yourselves! 😉

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 65!

Abra-Abracadabra! Another movie weekender folks.

So high above a mountain range in a bright rainbow coloured hot air balloon, let us be your globe savvy exploring traveler as we float on past dense forests full of retro movie amazement, fields of cinematic awesomeness  while we keep one eye peeled through a telescope for celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

Hot Air Balloon Sibillini Mountains

SATURDAY 10th August

Smokey and the Bandit (1977) ITV London 1:45pm-3:30pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A truck driver accepts a challenge to deliver a consignment of beer to a party. He claims he can make the 900-mile round trip in just 28 hours, but a pompous sheriff is determined to stop him in his tracks, not least because his prospective daughter-in-law has deserted his son and hitched a ride with the unlikely hero. Comedy, starring Burt Reynolds, Jackie Gleason, Sally Field and Jerry Reed

Men's White Retro Star Cars Vintage T-Shirt from TruffleShuffle
Men's Retro Star Cars Vintage T-Shirt from TruffleShuffle

Men's Grey Retro Star Cars Jumper from TruffleShuffle
Men's Retro Star Cars Jumper from TruffleShuffle

The Karate Kid (1984) Watch 2:20pm-4:45pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A teenager at a new school befriends a pretty girl, but her ex-boyfriend is jealous and attacks him. During one particularly bad fight, a wise old caretaker intervenes and defeats the youngster’s assailants using his martial art skills. He goes on to mentor the boy and teach him karate so he can face his enemies in a tournament. Drama, with Ralph Macchio, Pat Morita and Elisabeth Shue

Men's Karate Kid Cobra Kai Fist Logo T-Shirt
Men's Karate Kid Cobra Kai Fist Logo T-Shirt

The Karate Kid Part II (1986) Watch 4:45pm-7:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
High-kicking teenager Daniel accompanies his venerable mentor Mr Miyagi when he returns to the Japanese province of Okinawa to visit his dying father. However, an old rival of Miyagi’s is waiting for them, while Daniel is drawn into a vicious conflict with their enemy’s own karate protégé. Martial arts sequel, starring Ralph Macchio, Pat Morita and Yuji Okumoto

Men's Daniel San Karate Kids Fancy Dress Costume
Men's Daniel San Karate Kids Fancy Dress Costume

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005) ITV London 7:00pm-9:50pm (2 hours 50 minutes)
The adolescent wizard is chosen to represent Hogwarts School in a prestigious – albeit dangerous – magical tournament. Meanwhile, the followers of the dreaded Lord Voldemort plot to restore their master to the land of the living. Fourth instalment of the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Robbie Coltrane, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Brendan Gleeson and Robert Pattinson

SUNDAY 11th August

An American Tail: Fievel Goes West (1991) Channel 5 2:30pm-4:00pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
Fievel and the Mousekewitz family set off to build a new life in the Wild West. However, their dream of finding a happy idyll is soon threatened by an evil feline who is setting a trap for the helpless mice. Animated adventure, with the voices of Phillip Glasser, James Stewart, John Cleese and Dom DeLuise

Flash Gordon (1980) ITV4 3:55pm-6:10pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
American football quarterback Flash Gordon and journalist Dale Arden find themselves aboard a rocket ship designed by scientist Dr Zarkov, who intends to travel across space to locate the source of recent natural disasters. The three arrive on the planet Mongo, where they soon learn that the attacks are the responsibility of evil emperor Ming the Merciless, who is planning to destroy the Earth. Sci-fi comic-strip adventure, with Sam J Jones, Max von Sydow, Brian Blessed, Melody Anderson, Topol, Timothy Dalton, Ornella Muti, Peter Wyngarde and Mariangela Melato. Featuring music by Queen.

Men's Flash Gordon Fancy Dress Costume
Men's Flash Gordon Fancy Dress Costume

Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990) 5* 5:45pm-8:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Cute furball Gizmo is reunited with his human friends Billy and Kate, who now work in the New York offices of an eccentric tycoon. However, it is not long before Gizmo has spawned a new generation of murderous carnivores, who quickly overrun the building – and a genetics lab where they produce even more startling mutations. Joe Dante’s comedy sequel, starring Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, John Glover and Christopher Lee

Gizzy Is The Shizzy Ladies Gremlins T-Shirt
Gizzy Is The Shizzy Ladies Gremlins T-Shirt

Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987) ITV4 6:10pm-8:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Commandant Lassard comes to the conclusion that his staff are overworked, so in an attempt to solve the problem, he assigns the clueless cops to teach a group of equally inept civilians how to combat crime. Comedy sequel, with Steve Guttenberg, Sharon Stone, Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow and David Graf.

Ramalamadingdong! Bonus movie clip time this week, our hero Mr Miyagi lays down some knowledge….

[lyte id=”DsLk6hVBE6Y” /]

Whatever you get up to this weekend, remember never stand under a tree in thunder storm and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo