The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 143

Beermats and bottle tops! It’s only the bloomin weekend already!

Heading out way to the local beer garden to enjoy some sweet evening sunshine, we’ll enter the garden of Eden that soothes our end of week woes with spirits high as we search for the few remaining spots of sunshine to set up base camp for the evening.
We’ll reminisce of stories past, get the latest with the dating gossip from the group or perhaps just end up discussing some of the weirdest and most wonderful topics imaginable before heading home and snuggling up on the sofa to catch some of the most retro cinematic wonder that was ever created.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 18th April

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King Kong
(1976) Film4 1:00pm-3:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Oil prospectors travel to a recently discovered and remote Pacific island, where they encounter a gigantic gorilla. The men manage to capture the huge ape and bring it back to America – but the confused creature is terrified by events and escapes, wreaking havoc in New York. Remake of the classic 1933 fantasy adventure, with Jeff Bridges, Jessica Lange and Charles Grodin.

Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles (2001) ITV London 2:40pm-4:30pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The Australian adventurer heads for the bright lights of LA with his wife and son – but it is not long before they become embroiled in a scheme to smuggle valuable paintings out of the former Yugoslavia. Comedy sequel, starring Paul Hogan, Linda Kozlowski, Jere Burns, Jonathan Banks and Serge Cockburn.

Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989) ITV2 3:30pm-5:20pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Two dim-witted teenagers with dreams of rock stardom seem doomed to fail a school history project, unaware the future of the human race depends on their success. A time traveller is given the job of making sure they pass the test by sending them on a series of adventures in the past. Comedy, starring Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter and George Carlin.

Fun Fact: The phone booth time machine in the film was given away as a contest prize in Nintendo Power magazine, as the magazine was promoting a then-new Bill and Ted game for the NES.

Muppets from Space (1999) GOLD 4:10pm-6:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Gonzo hits the road with pal Rizzo in tow and goes in search of his roots – only to make the amazing discovery that his parents belonged to a race of aliens. He then has to choose whether to board a UFO and return to his family, or stay with the friends he knows and loves. Family comedy, with F Murray Abraham, David Arquette, Ray Liotta, Andie MacDowell and Rob Schneider alongside the puppets.

Muppets T-Shirts

Apollo 13 (1995) ITV2 6:30pm-9:15pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
Fact-based drama about the ill-fated 1970 Apollo 13 mission to the moon. Crew leader Jim Lovell is faced with a nightmare when the mission suffers an on-board explosion – leaving the team stranded in space with a dwindling oxygen supply while flight controllers and engineers in Houston try to find a way to bring the crew safely back to Earth. With Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton, Ed Harris and Gary Sinise.

The Fugitive (1993) 5USA 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A doctor is convicted of his wife’s murder and forced to go on the run to prove his innocence – but his efforts to find the mysterious one-armed man he believes is the real killer are hampered by a tenacious US marshal. Thriller, starring Harrison Ford, an Oscar-winning Tommy Lee Jones, Sela Ward, Julianne Moore and Joe Pantoliano.

Red Heat (1988) ITV London 10:15pm-12:10am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A Russian detective travels to America to oversee the extradition of a Georgian drug baron responsible for supplying cocaine in Moscow. He is teamed up with a hostile Chicago cop, but when their prisoner kills an officer and escapes, they put aside their mutual mistrust to bring him to justice. Action thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Belushi, Peter Boyle, Laurence Fishburne and Ed O’Ross.

SUNDAY 19th April

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When Harry Met Sally (1989) Zing 5:00pm-5:30pm (30 minutes)
A man and a woman with different attitudes to life meet by chance and develop a close and long-lasting friendship. But over time, a mutual sexual attraction begins to develop and threatens to ruin their relationship – raising the question whether men and women can ever really be just friends. Romantic comedy, starring Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan.

Beetlejuice (1988) 5* 5:05pm-7:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Recently deceased couple Adam and Barbara Maitland enlist the professional services of a hard-boiled veteran ghost to scare away the obnoxious yuppie family who have moved into their former home. Tim Burton’s supernatural comedy, starring Michael Keaton, Geena Davis, Alec Baldwin, Winona Ryder, Jeffrey Jones and Catherine O’Hara.

Beetlejuice T-Shirt

Pocahontas (1995) Channel 5 5:40pm-7:15pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
A Native American princess falls in love with an English settler, but her father is distrustful of the Europeans – not without just cause, as a cruel governor is prepared to wage war to get his hands on the gold he believes they are hiding. Disney animated drama, with the voices of Irene Bedard, Mel Gibson and Christian Bale.

Jaws (1975) Sky Movies Sci-fi/Horror HD 6:45pm-9:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A New England seaside town’s tourist season is turned into a nightmare by a giant killer shark. The local police chief’s efforts to protect the public are thwarted by the greedy mayor, forcing him to join forces with a grizzled fisherman and a marine biologist to hunt and kill the monster predator. Steven Spielberg’s thriller, starring Roy Scheider, Richard Dreyfuss and Robert Shaw.

Jaws T-Shirts

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) Channel 5 7:20pm-9:00pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) BBC3 8:10pm-10:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The intrepid archaeologist, with his young sidekick and a nightclub singer in tow, is stranded in India, where he takes on a mission to recover magical sacred stones from the hands of an evil cult engaged in human sacrifice and child slavery. Steven Spielberg’s action adventure, starring Harrison Ford, Kate Capshaw, Ke Huy Quan and Amrish Puri.

Fun Fact #1: The rope bridge used during the final fight scene was actually suspended up a couple of hundred feet across a gorge on location in Sri Lanka. Acrophobic Steven Spielberg would never walk over it, and had to drive a mile and a half to reach the other side. Harrison Ford on the other hand had no such fear, and would run across it at full speed.

Fun Fact #2: D.R. Nanayakkara, cast as the Indian village Shaman, did not speak a word of English. He delivered his lines phonetically by mimicking Steven Spielberg who was prompting him off camera. The pauses in his dialogue were therefore not for dramatic effect, but rather waiting for his next line.

The Mask (1994) Sky Movies Family HD 9:50pm-11:40pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A timid bank clerk stumbles on an ancient mask, which endows whoever wears it with untold superhuman powers, unbridled self-confidence and an irresistible charm for the ladies. Unfortunately, he earns the enmity of a local gangster for daring to flirt with his girlfriend – and when the crook gets wind of the artefact’s existence, he covets the power for himself. Comic-book comedy, with Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert and Peter Greene.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to always give a lucky tap and to shut all the windows before you leave the house.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 131

Magician’s wand! Is it really the weekend?

Appearing as quickly as it will disappear, the weekend is here once again with a puff, flash and bang and sure to bring as much mystery, glamour and flamboyance as a top stage show magician. Waving our hands around in spectacular fashion but only to distract and amaze, we’ll be pulling out cards from your very pocket at such a rate they will become animated like some of the great celluloid creations.
Sit back, open your mind and prepare to be amazed!

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 10th January

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Richie Rich
(1994) ITV2 1:10pm-3:05pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
The world’s wealthiest youngster has everything he could possibly want except friends. When his parents go missing, he must try to keep their fortune out of the clutches of a scheming executive, with the help of some less well-off children. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, John Larroquette, Jonathan Hyde, Edward Herrmann, Christine Ebersole and Mike McShane.

Superman III (1983) 5USA 4:00pm-6:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
The Man of Steel battles an evil tycoon, who has recruited a computer genius to aid his schemes for world domination. Together the villains hatch a plan to dispose of Superman once and for all – but instead of killing the superhero, they accidentally unveil his dark side. Comic-book adventure sequel, starring Christopher Reeve, Richard Pryor, Robert Vaughn and Margot Kidder.

Clueless (1995) Film4 4:40pm-6:35pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A rich high-school student uses all her charm and financial clout to boost an awkward new pupil’s image, but soon finds she has created a monster – while her own popularity suffers in the process. Comedy inspired by Jane Austen’s Emma, starring Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy and Paul Rudd.

Rocky II (1979) 5USA 6:35pm-9:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Philadelphia boxer Rocky Balboa quits the ring to marry his sweetheart and become a father. However, times prove hard and money is tight, so when Balboa is offered another shot at Apollo Creed’s heavyweight title, the fighter is lured out of retirement. Drama sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers, Burt Young and Burgess Meredith.

Lethal Weapon (1987) Sky Movies Action & Adventure 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
An unstable Vietnam veteran cop teams up with a by-the-book Los Angeles police detective to investigate the apparent suicide of the daughter of a wealthy businessman, leading them to a violent and bloody confrontation with a ruthless drug cartel under the control of a retired US general. Action thriller, starring Mel Gibson, Danny Glover, Gary Busey, Mitchell Ryan and Tom Atkins.

Fun Fact: Lethal Weapon was the first movie to feature a cellphone. It can be seen when Murtaugh calls his wife to tell Amanda Hunsaker’s death, and when later Murtaugh calls Dr. Stephanie Woods to talk about Riggs’ insanity.

Gremlins (1984) Sky1 9:00pm-11:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A teenager is given a strange, cute creature as a Christmas present by his eccentric father and warned to keep it away from water, not to feed it after midnight, or expose it to direct light. However, a chance dousing causes the furball to spawn a horde of murderous little monsters, and their devilish antics bring mayhem to a small town. Comedy horror, with Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, Hoyt Axton and Polly Holliday.

SUNDAY 11th January

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American Pie
(1999) Sky Movies Comedy 10:25am-12:15pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Four teenage boys make a solemn pact to lose their virginity before the high-school prom, and though their antics cause them huge embarrassment and public humiliation, the friends also learn about love and affection in their relations with the opposite sex. Coming-of-age comedy, starring Jason Biggs, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Klein, Alyson Hannigan, Mena Suvari, Seann William Scott and Eugene Levy.

The Mask (1994) Sky Movies Comedy 2:35pm-4:25pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A timid bank clerk stumbles on an ancient mask, which endows whoever wears it with untold superhuman powers, unbridled self-confidence and an irresistible charm for the ladies. Unfortunately, he earns the enmity of a local gangster for daring to flirt with his girlfriend – and when the crook gets wind of the artefact’s existence, he covets the power for himself. Comic-book comedy, with Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert and Peter Greene.

Flash Gordon (1980) Film4 Film4 3:05pm-5:20pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
American football quarterback Flash Gordon and journalist Dale Arden find themselves aboard a rocket ship designed by scientist Dr Zarkov, who intends to travel across space to locate the source of recent natural disasters. The three arrive on the planet Mongo, where they soon learn that the attacks are the responsibility of evil emperor Ming the Merciless, who is planning to destroy the Earth. Sci-fi comic-strip adventure, with Sam J Jones, Max von Sydow, Brian Blessed, Melody Anderson, Topol, Timothy Dalton, Ornella Muti, Peter Wyngarde and Mariangela Melato.

Diamonds Are Forever (1971) ITV London ITV London 4:15pm-6:35pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
James Bond investigates a diamond-smuggling operation, and discovers that behind the scheme is his insidious arch-enemy Blofeld, who is planning to construct a devastating orbital doomsday weapon powered by the precious stones, which will force world powers to disarm and give him global domination. Spy adventure, starring Sean Connery, Jill St John, Charles Gray, Bernard Lee and Lois Maxwell.

10 Things I Hate About You (1999) E4 8:00pm-9:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Lively teenager Bianca is not allowed to start dating until her man-hating sister Kat does first – but no boy is brave enough to ask her out. However, Bianca’s would-be boyfriend thinks he has found the perfect man for the job in the shape of a quirky loner with a mysterious past. Comedy, based on Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew, starring Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Larisa Oleynik.

Teen Wolf (1985) Syfy 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
A teenage misfit is initially dismayed to learn he is a werewolf as a result of a hereditary curse. He finds there are advantages as he becomes a local celebrity, while his enhanced agility makes him the star player of his school’s basketball team – but fame quickly goes to his head. Comedy, starring Michael J Fox, James Hampton and Susan Ursitti.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make sure you don’t order more than you can possibly eat and remember to always start from the outside in.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 125

Knights Templar! It’s the weekend all over again!

Like a great, tall, dark and powerful knight getting ready for the next battle, we’ll strap and tie on our shiny retro movie greatness as our armor against boredom before mounting our noble steed of cinematic greatness and ride into this weekends movie adventures. Let us ride into enemy lines and return with their treasures of gold, minerals and celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 22nd NOVEMBER

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Dungeons and Dragons (2000)
ITV2 2:30pm-4:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
In a fantasy kingdom ruled over by powerful wizards, a young empress plans to use their powers to bring peace and prosperity for all. However, an evil sorcerer plots to use a magic sceptre to force dragons to do his bidding so he can seize control. The only hope is to obtain an even more powerful mystical artifact, so a pair of thieves are sent on a quest to find it. Fantasy adventure, starring Jeremy Irons, Thora Birch, Marlon Wayans and Lee Arenberg.

Street Fighter (1994) 5* 3:35pm-5:35pm (2 hours)
A military officer goes in search of a power-mad general who is holding several hostages in a secret location. He soon finds he is not the only one on the maniac’s trail, and joins forced with a mismatched band of martial artists to save the captives. Action adventure based on the video game, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme, Raul Julia, Kylie Minogue and Ming-Na Wen.

Star Trek: Insurrection (1998) Film4 4:55pm-7:05pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Captain Picard and the Enterprise crew uncover a conspiracy by their own superiors and a sinister alien race to take over a peaceful world and exploit its power to prolong life. However, the crew is forced to defy Federation orders and turns renegade to protect the planet’s inhabitants. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Patrick Stewart, F Murray Abraham, Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner and Michael Dorn.

Innerspace (1987) 5* 5:35pm-8:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A Navy test pilot is shrunk in a ground-breaking scientific experiment, but instead of being injected into a laboratory rabbit, the tiny specimen accidentally winds up inside a hypochondriac supermarket worker. As he tries to find a way out, criminals come after the unlikely duo in search of the secret of the miniaturising technology. Sci-fi comedy, starring Dennis Quaid, Martin Short, Meg Ryan, Kevin McCarthy, Fiona Lewis and Vernon Wells.

Fun Fact: All of the cells seen outside the pod were in fact made out of Jello according to Peter Kuran, the special effects supervisor.

A View to a Kill (1985) ITV4 9:00pm-11:45pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
James Bond clashes with a megalomaniac international businessman plotting a global takeover of the computer industry by engineering a devastating earthquake in California’s Silicon Valley – and killing millions in the process. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore in his final appearance as 007 alongside Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Tanya Roberts and Patrick Macnee.

The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996) Channel 5 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
An amnesiac teacher starts to experience disturbing flashbacks of her former life and hires a private eye to help her learn more about her history. His findings unearth a murky past and her involvement with a shadowy government organisation – whose agents have been dispatched to kill them both. Action thriller, with Geena Davis and Samuel L Jackson, alongside Patrick Malahide, Brian Cox and Craig Bierko.

Raging Bull (1980) ITV4 11:45pm-2:25am (2 hours 40 minutes)
Biopic of boxer Jake LaMotta, who rose to fame as the world middleweight champion in the 1940s. His career was marred by an inability to deal with his anger, leaving his family bearing the brunt of his rage and paranoia. Directed by Martin Scorsese and starring an Oscar-winning Robert De Niro alongside Joe Pesci and Cathy Moriarty.

SUNDAY 23rd NOVEMBER

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Richie Rich (1994)
5* 4:10pm-6:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The world’s wealthiest youngster has everything he could possibly want except friends. When his parents go missing, he must try to keep their fortune out of the clutches of a scheming executive, with the help of some less well-off children. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, John Larroquette, Jonathan Hyde, Edward Herrmann, Christine Ebersole and Mike McShane.

The Truman Show (1998) Sky Movies Comedy 6:10pm-8:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A man is unaware his uneventful life is really a sham, and his every move is being secretly filmed and broadcast to the world as part of a 24-hour TV soap. However, a series of unforeseen events leads him to question the nature of his existence. Peter Weir’s media satire, starring Jim Carrey, Natascha McElhone, Laura Linney, Noah Emmerich and Ed Harris.

Fun Fact: The Trumania bit, where Jim Carrey draws on the mirror with soap and acts strange, was completely improvised by Carrey. In another take he drew long curly hair and a dress.

The Golden Child (1986) Film4 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A private eye is recruited by a group of Buddhist mystics and sent on a mission to rescue an abducted boy whose supernatural powers will enable him to bring about world peace. However, the kidnapper is actually a demon in human form, determined to ensure the youngster does not fulfill his destiny. Comedy fantasy adventure, starring Eddie Murphy, Charles Dance and Charlotte Lewis.

Tron (1982) Sky Movies Disney 8:00pm-9:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A computer genius hacks into the mainframe of the company he used to work for, hoping to find evidence against the executive who stole his ideas. However, the intelligent master program running the system transports him into an electronic world, where he is forced to battle gladiators in a series of deadly games. Disney sci-fi adventure, starring Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner and David Warner.

First Blood (1982) ITV4 11:35pm-1:40am (2 hours 5 minutes)
Vietnam veteran John Rambo is wrongfully arrested in a backwoods town and tested to the limits of his endurance by a brutal deputy. Rambo escapes from his cell and heads out to the woods, and with the forces of the law in hot pursuit he finally has the chance to fight them on his own terms. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Brian Dennehy, Richard Crenna and David Caruso.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember bigger isn’t always better and you can always loose, just don’t loose the lesson.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 124

Cheese and crackers! It’s time for another weekly retro movie rundown!!

Like one of the top American Football athletes of our time, let us strap and click on our protective pads as we get ready to throw long into the weekends greatest retro movies. We’ll duck and weave our way around even the biggest opponents are we run it home before posing for the moment to be forever captured and shared forever as celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

Saturday 15th November

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Escape from the Planet of the Apes (1971)
More4 11:05am-1:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Intelligent chimpanzees Cornelius and Zira escape the destruction of their planet by travelling back in time to 1970s America. Although initially treated as celebrities, the government comes to regard the pair as a threat to the human race when it transpires that Zira is pregnant. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter, Sal Mineo and Ricardo Montalban.

Billion Dollar Brain (1967) ITV4 1:05pm-3:15pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Former secret agent Harry Palmer comes out of retirement to take a mysterious canister to Finland, and ends up embroiled in an American megalomaniac’s bid to take over the world. Espionage thriller, directed by Ken Russell and starring Michael Caine, Oscar Homolka and Karl Malden.

The War of the Worlds (1953) Film4 3:25pm-5:10pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A meteor strike in southern California turns out to contain a deadly alien war machine that wipes out anything in its path. This machine is the vanguard of a mass invasion of aliens from Mars, who are intent on wiping out the human race and claiming Earth for themselves. Sci-fi drama, updating HG Wells’ novel to a 20th-century setting, starring Gene Barry, Ann Robinson and Les Tremayne.

Dark Star (1974) Film4 5:10pm-6:50pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A spaceship is sent on a mission to destroy unstable planets. The crew’s pet alien escapes and sets off a sentient bomb, which the astronauts have to persuade not to explode. Sci-fi comedy, the directorial debut of John Carpenter, starring Dan O’Bannon, Brian Narelle, Dre Pahich and Cal Kuniholm.

The Mask (1994) Sky Movies Comedy 6:10pm-8:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A timid bank clerk stumbles on an ancient mask, which endows whoever wears it with untold superhuman powers, unbridled self-confidence and an irresistible charm for the ladies. Unfortunately, he earns the enmity of a local gangster for daring to flirt with his girlfriend – and when the crook gets wind of the artefact’s existence, he covets the power for himself. Comic-book comedy, with Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert and Peter Greene.

Fun Facts: The banana-yellow suit that Jim Carrey wears is based on a suit which his mother made for him for his first attempt at stand-up comedy. This was also Cameron Diaz’s first movie role!

Never Say Never Again (1983) ITV4 9:00pm-11:45pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
James Bond investigates the hijacking of two American nuclear warheads and tracks the stolen missiles to the Bahamas, where a sinister millionaire working for criminal organisation Spectre is planning to hold the world to ransom. Action adventure, starring Sean Connery, Klaus Maria Brandauer, Kim Basinger, Max von Sydow and Barbara Carrera.

Sunday 16th November

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The Cable Guy (1996)
Sky Movies Comedy 7:45am-9:25am (1 hour 40 minutes)
A man makes the mistake of engaging a cable TV installer in conversation in a ploy to get all the channels for free. However, the manic repairman shows an invincible determination to be his new best friend – and does not take kindly to rejection. Comedy directed by Ben Stiller, starring Jim Carrey, Matthew Broderick and George Segal.

Big Trouble in Little China (1986) Sky Movies Aliens 9:30am-11:15am (1 hour 45 minutes)
A dim-witted and fearless trucker goes in search of his friend’s kidnapped fiancee in San Francisco’s Chinatown. He blunders into a supernatural world ruled by a powerful ghostly sorcerer, who needs the captured woman so he can rejoin the land of the living. Comedy fantasy adventure, starring Kurt Russell, Dennis Dun, Kim Cattrall, James Hong and Victor Wong.

Gremlins (1984) Sky Movies Greats 12:00pm-1:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A teenager is given a strange, cute creature as a Christmas present by his eccentric father and warned to keep it away from water, not to feed it after midnight, or expose it to direct light. However, a chance dousing causes the furball to spawn a horde of murderous little monsters, and their devilish antics bring mayhem to a small town. Comedy horror, with Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, Hoyt Axton and Polly Holliday.

Titanic (1997) Film4 3:20pm-7:05pm (3 hours 45 minutes)
A party of explorers studying the sunken remains of the famous liner meets an elderly woman who was a passenger on the ill-fated maiden voyage. She recounts how she boarded the ship while on the brink of being forced into marriage by her family, and was stopped from killing herself by a penniless artist. She fell in love with her saviour, but the disaster on the horizon meant their time together was doomed to be short. James Cameron’s Oscar-winning romantic drama, starring Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, Billy Zane, Kathy Bates and Bill Paxton.

Fun Fact: The movie’s line “I’m the king of the world!” was ad-libbed by DiCaprio and was later was voted as #4 of “The 100 Greatest Movie Lines” by Premiere in 2007. The same was voted as the #100 movie quote by the American Film Institute (out of 100).

Dumb and Dumber (1994) Channel 5 5:25pm-7:30pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Dimwitted Rhode Island limousine driver Lloyd Christmas and his equally vacuous friend Harry Dunne embark on a disaster-fraught cross-country trip to Aspen, where they hope to reunite a briefcase with its female owner. However, the pair are unaware the case contains a $1million ransom they would have been better leaving well alone. Farrelly brothers comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Jeff Daniels, Lauren Holly, Teri Garr and Mike Starr.

Face/Off (1997) BBC3 11:15pm-1:25am (2 hours 10 minutes)
FBI agent Sean Archer captures terrorist Castor Troy, the man who killed his son. While Troy is in a coma, Archer has the crook’s face surgically grafted onto his own so he can go undercover and locate a bomb planted somewhere in Los Angeles. But then Troy regains consciousness – and in turn takes on Archer’s identity. John Woo’s action thriller, starring Nicolas Cage, John Travolta, Joan Allen, Gina Gershon and Dominique Swain.

Conan the Barbarian (1982) Film4 11:05pm-1:40am (2 hours 35 minutes)
A child who grows up in slavery becomes a formidable warrior and a cunning thief. Taken prisoner by a victorious king, he is sent out to destroy the leader of the barbaric cult that destroyed his village and slaughtered his family. Fantasy adventure, based on the stories by author Robert E Howard, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Max von Sydow, James Earl Jones and Sandahl Bergman.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make sure you stop, look and listen and start from the outside in.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 113

Great Barrier Reef! Is it nearly the weekend already?!

So, like a brightly blue coloured Surgeonfish, we’ll scurry our way around in our ever growing school of friends, navigating the maze of tropical coral that’s teaming with life and colour on the hunt for food and shelter away from the bigger and more menacing movie monsters of the sea. We’ll scratch around and uncover some retro movie classics, always looking for our next fix of celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 30th AUGUST

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) 5* 4:05pm-5:50pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
The eccentric pet detective is coaxed out of self-imposed exile in a Buddhist monastery to visit Africa and help search for a sacred white bat. However, his unique investigative talents are tested to the limits as he faces a race against time to find the missing creature and prevent a tribal war. Comedy sequel, starring Jim Carrey, Simon Callow and Bob Gunton.

Jurassic Park III (2001) ITV2 7:35pm-9:25pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Palaeontologist Dr Alan Grant is lured to a dinosaur-infested island by a divorced couple who offer to fund his research, unaware their real motive is to find their missing son – and that the creatures on the island are far more intelligent than anyone suspected. Action adventure sequel, starring Sam Neill, William H Macy, Tea Leoni and Alessandro Nivola.

Jurassic Park T-Shirts

Airplane! (1980) Film4 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
The passengers on board an ill-fated airliner become increasingly jittery when the flight crew flounder during a food-poisoning crisis. As ground control personnel struggle heroically to ensure the plane lands safely, a traumatised war veteran must face his fear to take the controls. Spoof disaster movie, starring Robert Hays, Leslie Nielsen, Robert Stack and Lloyd Bridges.

Fun Fact! For the argument between announcers concerning the white and red zones at the airport, the producers hired the same voice artists who had made the real-world announcements at Los Angeles International Airport. At the real airport, the white zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only, and there’s no stopping in the red zone (except for transit buses). They were also married to each other in real life.

Parenthood (1989) ITV London 10:45pm-1:00am (2 hours 15 minutes)
Anxious family man Gil Buckman is determined to have a better relationship with his three children than he had with his tough father. Elsewhere, his two sisters are also having family problems – one is struggling to understand her two troubled teenagers, while the other’s husband wants to turn their toddler into a child genius. Comedy drama, starring Steve Martin, Keanu Reeves, Mary Steenburgen, Jason Robards and Dianne Wiest.

SUNDAY 31st AUGUST

The Borrowers (1997) ITV London 1:30pm-3:10pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A family of four-inch-high people living beneath the floorboards of an ordinary human home help the owner’s son fight back when a dastardly lawyer plans to demolish the house and make way for a luxury apartment block. Children’s fantasy, starring John Goodman, Jim Broadbent, Celia Imrie, Flora Newbigin and Tom Felton.

Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986) ITV4 4:15pm-6:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Facing closure from cutbacks in public spending and competition from a more successful academy, the police training school calls on its bungling graduates to act as instructors and make good officers out of a bunch of new recruits even more incompetent than they are. Comedy sequel, starring Steve Guttenberg, Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow and Art Metrano.

The Golden Child (1986) Film4 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A private eye is recruited by a group of Buddhist mystics and sent on a mission to rescue an abducted boy whose supernatural powers will enable him to bring about world peace. However, the kidnapper is actually a demon in human form, determined to ensure the youngster does not fulfil his destiny. Comedy fantasy adventure, starring Eddie Murphy, Charles Dance and Charlotte Lewis.

The Breakfast Club (1985) ITV3 11:05pm-1:10am (2 hours 5 minutes)
Five teenagers who occupy different areas of their school’s social structure are thrown together for a Saturday morning detention. During the day, they analyse their behaviour and find unexpected common ground. Drama, directed by John Hughes and starring Emilio Estevez, Judd Nelson, Molly Ringwald, Anthony Michael Hall, Ally Sheedy and Paul Gleason.

Fun Fact: The film’s gut-wrenching heart-to-heart, where all five kids spill deep, dark secrets, was actually ad-libbed.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to leave a tip and don’t forget your chargers.

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