The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 43!

Mrs Pillsbury’s doughboy! Behold, weekend joy for all!

So like the ever hairy, very scary, bug eyed, big toothed monster lurking in the shadows beneath your bed, waiting for you to drift off just so it can mess with your bed linens. Let us be your always vigilant, brave and bold monster seeker, armed with the torch of mega movie greatness, we will pull back the sheets of awesome cinematic joy and search through the closet of infinite celluloid wonder. So you can rest your little head.Have a happy retro weekend 🙂

SATURDAY 2nd MARCH

Field of Dreams (1989) Sky Movies Modern Greats 3:45pm-5:35pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A farmer hears a mysterious voice inspiring him to mark out a baseball pitch in a cornfield – which, to his surprise, is visited by the ghost of the star player of the 1919 Chicago White Sox team, whose career was cut short by scandal. It later dawns on him the pitch has a greater purpose – to give people who have sacrificed important parts of their lives a second chance. Fantasy, starring Kevin Costner, Ray Liotta, Burt Lancaster and James Earl Jones.

Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989) Film4 5:05pm-6:55pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A professor invents a ray with the power to reduce objects in size. Unfortunately, his kids and their meddling friends trigger it off and are shrunk to microscopic proportions. When they are accidentally thrown out with the rubbish, the children have to contend with all kinds of animals and insects on their journey home across the backyard. Disney comedy, with Rick Moranis, Marcia Strassman and Amy O’Neill.

Judge Dredd (1995) 5USA 8:00pm-10:00pm (2 hours)
A law enforcer in a post-apocalyptic city is framed for a series of crimes committed by a fugitive who shares his DNA. He escapes from a prison transport and returns to hunt down the culprit and clear his own name. Sci-fi thriller based on the 2000AD comic-strip, starring Sylvester Stallone, Armand Assante, Max von Sydow, Diane Lane and Rob Schneider.

Men's Black I Am The Law Judge Dredd T-Shirt £17.99
Men's Black I Am The Law Judge Dredd T-Shirt £17.99

Forrest Gump (1994) Film4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A simple soul bumbles his way through a series of bizarre adventures, becoming an American football star, Vietnam veteran, table tennis champion and millionaire businessman – but the love of his life continues to elude him. Robert Zemeckis’s Oscar-winning comedy drama, starring Tom Hanks, Sally Field, Robin Wright and Gary Sinise.

SUNDAY 3rd MARCH

See No Evil, Hear No Evil (1989)Channel 5 1:40pm-3:30pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A blind man and his deaf friend go on the run to clear themselves of a trumped-up murder charge. However, all kinds of oddball characters are on their trail, determined to get hold of a top-secret microchip that the duo do not know they have. Comedy, starring Richard Pryor, Gene Wilder, Kevin Spacey, Joan Severance, Alan North and Anthony Zerbe.

Beethoven (1991)ITV2 4:10pm-6:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.

Rocky (1976)Channel 5 6:45pm-9:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Philadelphia brawler Rocky Balboa gets a shot at the world heavyweight title when current champion Apollo Creed decides to give an unknown boxer a chance in celebration of America’s bicentennial. Oscar-winning drama, starring Sylvester Stallone, Burgess Meredith, Talia Shire, Burt Young and Carl Weathers.

Men's Rocky Logo T-Shirt £16.99 (also available for ladies)
Men's Rocky Logo T-Shirt £16.99 (also available for ladies)

Lethal Weapon 2 (1989)ITV4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Headstrong cop Martin Riggs and his cautious partner Roger Murtaugh stumble across a plot by a South African diplomat to launder drugs money by shipping gold coins into the US via his embassy. Protected by diplomatic immunity, the crook looks certain to evade the law – while his chief henchman has a connection to Riggs’ traumatic past. Action thriller sequel, with Mel Gibson, Danny Glover, Joe Pesci, Joss Ackland, Derrick O’Connor and Patsy Kensit.

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember to enjoy yourselves and keep an eye out for that pesky monster. We’ll get it next time promise!

Bye.

From Romance to Bromance – TruffleShuffle’s Got It Covered This Valentine’s!

TruffleShuffle‘s one stop guide to movies on the box this Valentine’s day!

So if all’s gone to plan Casanova has swept you off your feet or Prince Charming has melted your heart to a cheesy fondue like substance! You may have received acres of roses, masses of heart shaped chocolates or you were lucky your bloke remembered and made that last minute dash to the petrol station and got you something meaningful and romantic like a rose scented magic tree for your car (hey I try!)

Or maybe you don’t  believe in  Valentine’s day at all and you’ll ignore everything going on around you because it’s a scam made up by  corporate fat cats and big wigs to get you to waste money on rubbish that’s going to end up in the bin anyway. Whichever category you fall in to I’ll do my best for you if you’re spending Valentine’s night in alone or with your partner.

I’ll start with the two most romantic movies on tonight.

First up a film I’ve not seen (it sounds a bit slushy!) “You’ve got mail” ITV2 7.30pm – two rivals in a bookshop business fall in love over the internet, unaware they know and dislike each other in the real world. With Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. It’s most likely to be like “Sleepless in Seattle” but then I’ve never seen that either (most definitely slushy!) I can however quote Joey from Friends and say “Meg Ryan get’s mail and stuff”.

On the same channel “The Bodyguard” ITV2 11.00pm – A famous singer subjected to death threats by an obsessive fan is persuaded to hire a former secret service agent as her bodyguard, but neither of them realise the effect they are about to have on each other. Starring Kevin Costner and Whitney Houston. I believe I still own this on VHS somewhere, we’d religiously watch it when we got surround sound for the telly. I also believe this to be the prime choice if you’re having a couple’s night in or just a single lass crying into a bucket of ice cream 🙂

So, if you’re spending Valentine’s Solo, male or female I’ve a got a few film choices for you.

First off is “Hard Target” ITV4 9.00pm – A woman searching for her missing father hires an out of work merchant sailor to guide her through the streets of new Orleans where his martial arts skills are greatly tested in a series of encounters with sadistic hunters of human prey. Starring Jean Claude Van Damme. For one, the ladies get to watch Van Damme and two, Van Damme bites the tail off a rattlesnake – what’s not to love about that?

Choice two “Heartbreak ridge” 5USA also 9.00pm – A hell raising US marine sergeant is assigned to whip a squad of recruits into shape for the invasion of Grenada 1983 but his old fashioned hard as nails methods meet with disapproval from superior officers. Starring Clint Eastwood. Probably one my favourite Eastwood movies and my pick if your boycotting Valentine’s day altogether, after all its called Heartbreak Ridge and it has one the best quotes of any movie ever – “my name’s Gunnery Sergeant Highway and I’ve drunk more beer and banged more quiff and pissed more blood and stomped more ass than all you numb nuts put together” – What a classy guy!

If you’re spending Valentine’s with mates and “bro’in it up” then I have a choice for you after all a bromance is a romance between two bros and should be respected.

Lethal weapon 2 TCM 11.25pm – Headstrong cop Martin Riggs and his partner Roger Murtaugh stumble across a plot by South African diplomat to launder drugs money by shipping gold coins into the us. Starring Danny Glover and Mel Gibson. Riggs and Murtaugh share a deep bromance, in my opinion this is the best lethal weapon ever by the shear genius of the exploding toilet scene if your “bro in out” watch this.

There is however one film that should be on tonight but is not, one film that expands the romance to bromance genre I’ve foolishly tried to lay out before you. Perhaps you have it on DVD, VHSor even Betamax if you’re that old! Maybe you could stream it off Netflix or Love film?

My ultimate romantic bromantic pick is Top Gun! Brash young pilot Lt. Pete Mitchell, nicknamed “Maverick” for his individualistic flying style, is sent to Miramar Naval Air Station, where he trains with the country’s best fighter pilots. The best student from each class wins the prized “Top Gun” award, and the privilege of remaining at Miramar as an instructor. Maverick’s chief competition is Tom Kasanzky, nicknamed “Iceman,” and eventually an international incident arises that allows the pilots to prove themselves. This is the ultimate choice for this day so rent, borrow, buy or thief it (well don’t do that, it’s wrong!)

However you decide to celebrate (or not!) have a LOVEly day!

xoxo