The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 125

Knights Templar! It’s the weekend all over again!

Like a great, tall, dark and powerful knight getting ready for the next battle, we’ll strap and tie on our shiny retro movie greatness as our armor against boredom before mounting our noble steed of cinematic greatness and ride into this weekends movie adventures. Let us ride into enemy lines and return with their treasures of gold, minerals and celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 22nd NOVEMBER

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Dungeons and Dragons (2000)
ITV2 2:30pm-4:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
In a fantasy kingdom ruled over by powerful wizards, a young empress plans to use their powers to bring peace and prosperity for all. However, an evil sorcerer plots to use a magic sceptre to force dragons to do his bidding so he can seize control. The only hope is to obtain an even more powerful mystical artifact, so a pair of thieves are sent on a quest to find it. Fantasy adventure, starring Jeremy Irons, Thora Birch, Marlon Wayans and Lee Arenberg.

Street Fighter (1994) 5* 3:35pm-5:35pm (2 hours)
A military officer goes in search of a power-mad general who is holding several hostages in a secret location. He soon finds he is not the only one on the maniac’s trail, and joins forced with a mismatched band of martial artists to save the captives. Action adventure based on the video game, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme, Raul Julia, Kylie Minogue and Ming-Na Wen.

Star Trek: Insurrection (1998) Film4 4:55pm-7:05pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Captain Picard and the Enterprise crew uncover a conspiracy by their own superiors and a sinister alien race to take over a peaceful world and exploit its power to prolong life. However, the crew is forced to defy Federation orders and turns renegade to protect the planet’s inhabitants. Sci-fi adventure sequel, starring Patrick Stewart, F Murray Abraham, Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner and Michael Dorn.

Innerspace (1987) 5* 5:35pm-8:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
A Navy test pilot is shrunk in a ground-breaking scientific experiment, but instead of being injected into a laboratory rabbit, the tiny specimen accidentally winds up inside a hypochondriac supermarket worker. As he tries to find a way out, criminals come after the unlikely duo in search of the secret of the miniaturising technology. Sci-fi comedy, starring Dennis Quaid, Martin Short, Meg Ryan, Kevin McCarthy, Fiona Lewis and Vernon Wells.

Fun Fact: All of the cells seen outside the pod were in fact made out of Jello according to Peter Kuran, the special effects supervisor.

A View to a Kill (1985) ITV4 9:00pm-11:45pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
James Bond clashes with a megalomaniac international businessman plotting a global takeover of the computer industry by engineering a devastating earthquake in California’s Silicon Valley – and killing millions in the process. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore in his final appearance as 007 alongside Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Tanya Roberts and Patrick Macnee.

The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996) Channel 5 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
An amnesiac teacher starts to experience disturbing flashbacks of her former life and hires a private eye to help her learn more about her history. His findings unearth a murky past and her involvement with a shadowy government organisation – whose agents have been dispatched to kill them both. Action thriller, with Geena Davis and Samuel L Jackson, alongside Patrick Malahide, Brian Cox and Craig Bierko.

Raging Bull (1980) ITV4 11:45pm-2:25am (2 hours 40 minutes)
Biopic of boxer Jake LaMotta, who rose to fame as the world middleweight champion in the 1940s. His career was marred by an inability to deal with his anger, leaving his family bearing the brunt of his rage and paranoia. Directed by Martin Scorsese and starring an Oscar-winning Robert De Niro alongside Joe Pesci and Cathy Moriarty.

SUNDAY 23rd NOVEMBER

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Richie Rich (1994)
5* 4:10pm-6:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The world’s wealthiest youngster has everything he could possibly want except friends. When his parents go missing, he must try to keep their fortune out of the clutches of a scheming executive, with the help of some less well-off children. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, John Larroquette, Jonathan Hyde, Edward Herrmann, Christine Ebersole and Mike McShane.

The Truman Show (1998) Sky Movies Comedy 6:10pm-8:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A man is unaware his uneventful life is really a sham, and his every move is being secretly filmed and broadcast to the world as part of a 24-hour TV soap. However, a series of unforeseen events leads him to question the nature of his existence. Peter Weir’s media satire, starring Jim Carrey, Natascha McElhone, Laura Linney, Noah Emmerich and Ed Harris.

Fun Fact: The Trumania bit, where Jim Carrey draws on the mirror with soap and acts strange, was completely improvised by Carrey. In another take he drew long curly hair and a dress.

The Golden Child (1986) Film4 7:15pm-9:00pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A private eye is recruited by a group of Buddhist mystics and sent on a mission to rescue an abducted boy whose supernatural powers will enable him to bring about world peace. However, the kidnapper is actually a demon in human form, determined to ensure the youngster does not fulfill his destiny. Comedy fantasy adventure, starring Eddie Murphy, Charles Dance and Charlotte Lewis.

Tron (1982) Sky Movies Disney 8:00pm-9:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A computer genius hacks into the mainframe of the company he used to work for, hoping to find evidence against the executive who stole his ideas. However, the intelligent master program running the system transports him into an electronic world, where he is forced to battle gladiators in a series of deadly games. Disney sci-fi adventure, starring Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner and David Warner.

First Blood (1982) ITV4 11:35pm-1:40am (2 hours 5 minutes)
Vietnam veteran John Rambo is wrongfully arrested in a backwoods town and tested to the limits of his endurance by a brutal deputy. Rambo escapes from his cell and heads out to the woods, and with the forces of the law in hot pursuit he finally has the chance to fight them on his own terms. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Brian Dennehy, Richard Crenna and David Caruso.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember bigger isn’t always better and you can always loose, just don’t loose the lesson.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 123

Snap, crackle and pop! It’s only the weekend already!

With the moonlight sky being decorated with the multicolored firmly embers from it’s barrage of rockets, we patiently but eagerly wait with our eyes firmly gazed at the stars for the next assault of the brightest, biggest and best fireworks in the land. Gloves, hats and coats are a must as we’re transported back to our childhoods and all the wonder and delight that captured our imaginations so many years ago.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 7th NOVEMBER

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Aliens (1986)
Sky Movies Aliens 12:30pm-3:00pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
Lone survivor Ripley is rescued in deep space decades after an alien creature wiped out her ship’s entire crew. She is recruited to accompany a military expedition to a colony on the planet where she first encountered the monster, only to find the aliens have been reproducing and there are now hordes of them. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller sequel, with Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn and Lance Henriksen.

Die Hard (1988) Sky Movies Christmas 1:50pm-4:05pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom – and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia.

Only You (1994) Film4 4:50pm-7:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A woman who was once told the identity of the person she would marry in a childhood Ouija board game is astounded when a man with the same name calls her on the eve of her wedding. After promptly dumping her dull fiance, she follows the stranger to Italy in the hope of convincing him they are meant to be together. Romantic comedy, with Marisa Tomei, Robert Downey Jr, Bonnie Hunt, Fisher Stevens and Billy Zane.

Twister (1996) ITV2 7:25pm-9:45pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A storm-chaser and her estranged husband are brought together in a joint project to monitor the path of an oncoming tornado – but the pair face a race against the clock as a rival government-backed group with hi-tech resources tries to beat them to it. Action thriller, starring Helen Hunt, Bill Paxton, Cary Elwes, Jami Gertz and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Fun Fact: A recording of a camel’s moan was slowed down and used as the sound of the tornado.

Matilda (1996) Sky Movies Family 9:35pm-11:15pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
A gifted youngster is packed off by her selfish parents to the prison-like Crunchem Hall School. Once there, she befriends a sweet-natured teacher who convinces her that not all grown-ups are bad – and urges her to use her special powers to turn the tables on the nasty headmistress. Fantasy comedy, adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl, with Mara Wilson, Pam Ferris, Embeth Davidtz, Rhea Perlman and Danny DeVito, who also directed.

SUNDAY 8th NOVEMBER

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Getting Even with Dad (1994)
Channel 5 12:40pm-2:50pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Spoilt child Timmy goes to live with his outwardly respectable father, but realises he is a small-time thief planning his latest robbery. Timmy sets out to reform his dad, and in the meantime manages to fix him up with an attractive undercover cop – leading to much confusion. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Ted Danson, Glenne Headly and Hector Elizondo.

The Shining (1980) Sky Movies Aliens 11:05am-1:20pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
An aspiring writer takes a caretaking job at a remote mountain hotel. It has closed for the winter, and he has been hired to get the place ready for the next season. But evil spirits haunting its corridors destroy his sanity, causing the unhinged author to rampage through the hotel and terrorise his wife and young son. Stanley Kubrick’s horror, based on the Stephen King novel, with Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, Danny Lloyd and Scatman Crothers.

Addams Family Values (1993) Channel 4 3:00pm-5:00pm (2 hours)
Spooky couple Gomez and Morticia hire a nanny to look after their new baby son – and stop him suffering an early death at the hands of his jealous elder siblings. Romance soon blossoms between the new childminder and Uncle Fester, but he does not realise she is planning to kill him once she has got hold of the family fortune. Comedy sequel, starring Anjelica Huston, Raul Julia, Christopher Lloyd, Christina Ricci and Joan Cusack.

Not retro buuuuuut…..

Despicable Me (2010) ITV2 4:20pm-6:10pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A criminal mastermind hopes to seal his reputation as the greatest villain of them all by stealing the moon. First he needs to get his hands on a shrinking ray owned by a rival evil genius, and adopts three orphan girls to help him – but finds that fatherhood brings out his long-buried caring side. Animated comedy, with the voices of Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand and Julie Andrews.

City Slickers (1991) MGM Channel 8:00pm-9:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Three middle-aged men take a break from the rat race and their mid-life crises to join a two-week cattle drive from New Mexico to Colorado. Together with a bunch of fellow urbanites, they find the going much tougher than expected, and it is down to a real-life cowboy to whip them into shape. Comedy adventure, starring Billy Crystal, Daniel Stern, Bruno Kirby and Jack Palance, who won an Oscar for his performance as grizzled trail boss Curly.

Rambo III (1988) Syfy 9:00pm-11:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Vietnam veteran John Rambo turns down a request from his old colonel to join a mission in Soviet-occupied Afghanistan. However, when the officer is captured, Rambo sets off to save him, joining the Mujahedeen rebels in fighting against the Russian invaders. Action adventure sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Kurtwood Smith, Marc de Jonge and Sasson Gabai.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make sure you check your mirrors before you signal and remember to always set reminders.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 120

Dinner for two! Is it really the weekend so soon?! What a week!

Arriving through the softly lit stonework archway at the end of the long drive way, we’re quickly greeted and whisked away through the grand manor decked out with oil paintings, animal trophies and leather seats before entering the grand but elegant dining hall, complete with long table decorated in silverware and candles. We’ll schmooze with the honoured guests before taking to our seats and eagerly awaiting the delights of the kitchen staff and toasting to the host.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 18th OCTOBER

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Throw Momma from the Train (1987)
MGM Channel 12:35pm-2:00pm (1 hour 25 minutes)
Timid, immature would-be author Owen still lives with his domineering mother, and fantasises about killing her. When his English tutor offers advice on how to write a good murder mystery, he gets the wrong idea and becomes convinced the teacher is asking him to kill his ex-wife, and will dispose of the monstrous matriarch in return. Black comedy, inspired by Hitchcock’s thriller Strangers on a Train, directed by and starring Danny DeVito, with Billy Crystal, Anne Ramsey, Kim Greist and Rob Reiner.

The Dirty Dozen (1967) 5USA 1:00pm-4:00pm (3 hours)
An uncompromising major is placed in charge of a seemingly suicidal mission to destroy a French chateau being used as a base by Nazi officers. Needing tough but expendable soldiers for the task, he recruits 12 hardened criminals from a military prison. Second World War action adventure, starring Lee Marvin, Telly Savalas, Ernest Borgnine, Charles Bronson and Donald Sutherland.

Demolition Man (1993) Sky Movies Action & Adventure 5:10pm-7:15pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Maverick cop John Spartan is frozen alive in 1996 and held in cryonic suspension for a crime he did not commit. Decades into the future, the dictator of a seemingly utopian city unleashes a criminal psychopath against his political enemy – but he proves impossible to control, forcing the authorities to revive Spartan to defeat him. Sci-fi thriller, with Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, Sandra Bullock and Nigel Hawthorne.

For Your Eyes Only (1981) ITV4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
James Bond goes in search of a British weapons system aboard a sunken vessel before it falls into the hands of enemies who will use it to deactivate all Western submarines. Unfortunately, his mission is hindered by a crossbow-toting woman out to avenge her father’s murder. Spy thriller, starring Roger Moore, Topol, Julian Glover, Carole Bouquet, Jill Bennett and Lynn-Holly Johnson.

Clerks (1994) Film4 11:25pm-1:15am (1 hour 50 minutes)
An unhappy shop assistant is forced to work on his day off, and also has to contend with his sarcastic best friend insulting all the customers. As his girlfriend pressures him to sort out his dead end life, he learns that an old flame has returned to town, forcing him to consider what he really wants. Comedy, the debut of writer-director Kevin Smith. Starring Brian O’Halloran, Jeff Anderson and Marilyn Ghigliotti.

SUNDAY 19th OCTOBER

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Uncle Buck (1989)
Sky Movies Comedy 9:35am-11:20am (1 hour 45 minutes)
An unreliable but good-natured slob is called upon to look after his trouble-making nephew and nieces while their parents are away – and what starts as a disaster soon changes for the better as the unlikely babysitter gets to grips with the finer points of being a responsible adult. Family comedy, starring John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Kelly, Gaby Hoffman, Amy Madigan and Laurie Metcalf.

Superman II (1980) ITV4 6:25pm-9:00pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
The Man of Steel meets his match in the form of three fugitive villains from his home planet of Krypton. Flying down to Earth, the super-powered trio unleash a reign of terror in a bid to take over the world – but Superman is not there to stop them, having surrendered his powers to lead a normal life with his beloved Lois Lane. Comic-strip adventure sequel, with Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Terence Stamp and Margot Kidder.

Superman T-Shirts

Back to the Future Part II (1989) ITV2 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Time-travelling teenager Marty McFly travels to the 21st century, where he has to save his children from a terrible fate. However, this proves to have unforeseen consequences when the future version of arch enemy Biff sees a chance to rewrite history for his own benefit, leaving Marty stuck in a twisted parallel universe. Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Michael J Fox and Christopher Lloyd.

Back To The Future T-Shirts

Jaws 2 (1978) ITV4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
The seaside resort of Amity is terrorised once again by a man-eating great white shark. While police chief Brody struggles to alert the townsfolk to the magnitude of the danger, a group of teenagers – including Brody’s two sons – is adrift at sea in waters hunted by the shark. Thriller sequel, starring Roy Scheider, Lorraine Gary and Murray Hamilton.

Jaws T-Shirt

Cast Away (2000) BBC2 London 10:00pm-12:15am (2 hours 15 minutes)
A manager for an American courier service has to fend for himself when a plane crash leaves him stranded alone on a desert island. Initially panic-stricken, he overcomes his terror to survive for four years on his own before building a raft and setting off on an epic journey back home. Adventure drama, starring Tom Hanks, Helen Hunt, Nick Searcy, Lari White and Chris Noth.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember a smile might just make their day and don’t forget the about recycling…..again 🙂

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 118

Cheese and crackers! It’s only the weekend again!

Like like back in the day in the good old US or A, the weekend sees us cruising our way to the Drive In cinema with our oh-so lucky date for the night. We’ll pick up our big box of popcorn and soda on the way to finding our spot in front of the big and bright screen that will soon whisk us off to far and distant lands with it’s celluloid wonder and tinny sounding speakers.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 4th OCTOBER

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King Kong (1976)
Film4 1:00pm-3:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Oil prospectors travel to a recently discovered and remote Pacific island, where they encounter a gigantic gorilla. The men manage to capture the huge ape and bring it back to America – but the confused creature is terrified by events and escapes, wreaking havoc in New York. Remake of the classic 1933 fantasy adventure, with Jeff Bridges, Jessica Lange and Charles Grodin.

Silverado (1985) Channel 5 5:05pm-7:35pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
Two drifters met by chance in the desert, later joined on their travels by one of the duo’s reckless younger brother and a man they break out of prison. The mismatched foursome rides to a run-down frontier town and fight to free it from the control of a crooked marshal and his cronies. Western, starring Kevin Kline, Kevin Costner, Scott Glenn, Danny Glover, Rosanna Arquette and Jeff Goldblum.

The Hunt for Red October (1990) Film4 6:10pm-8:50pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A Soviet submarine commander creates an international crisis by piloting his experimental nuclear vessel, which is invisible to sonar, toward the American coast. The US and Russian navies think he is planning to attack and set out to destroy the submarine, but a CIA analyst suspects he intends to defect to the West. Cold War thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, starring Sean Connery, Alec Baldwin and James Earl Jones.

Moonraker (1979) ITV4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
James Bond’s investigations into the mysterious disappearance of a space shuttle lead him to a sinister industrialist, who is plotting to wipe out most of the human race. The secret agent also faces a rematch with his old enemy, metal-toothed hitman Jaws. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Michael Lonsdale, Lois Chiles and the late Richard Kiel.

Fun Fact: The budget for Moonraker (1979) was more than the combined budget total of the first six EON James Bond movies put together.
ALSO! The cable that Jaws bites was actually made of licorice. Yum!

Forrest Gump (1994) Film4 9:00pm-11:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A simple soul bumbles his way through a series of bizarre adventures, becoming an American football star, Vietnam veteran, table tennis champion and millionaire businessman – but the love of his life continues to elude him. Robert Zemeckis’s Oscar-winning comedy drama, starring Tom Hanks, Sally Field, Robin Wright and Gary Sinise.

Red Heat (1988) ITV London 10:30pm-12:25am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A Russian detective travels to America to oversee the extradition of a Georgian drug baron responsible for supplying cocaine in Moscow. He is teamed up with a hostile Chicago cop, but when their prisoner kills an officer and escapes, they put aside their mutual mistrust to bring him to justice. Action thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Belushi, Peter Boyle, Laurence Fishburne and Ed O’Ross.

SUNDAY 5th OCTOBER

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Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
Film4 1:00pm-3:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Hapless youngster Kevin somehow manages to catch the wrong plane and finds himself heading for New York, while his family jets off to Florida. Having got his hands on his father’s credit card, he is enjoying the good life staying in a luxury hotel – until he bumps into two familiar burglars with an axe to grind. Comedy sequel, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, Brenda Fricker and Tim Curry.

Space Jam (1996) ITV2 3:15pm-4:55pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Aliens arrive on Earth to abduct the Looney Tunes gang as a new attraction at their failing intergalactic theme park. To keep their freedom, Bugs Bunny and friends challenge the invaders to a high-stakes basketball game, calling on Michael Jordan to save the day and send the extraterrestrials back where they came from. Live action and animated comedy, starring Bill Murray and Danny DeVito, with the voices of Billy West and Bill Farmer.

Superman (1978) ITV4 5:00pm-8:00pm (3 hours)
A fledgling superhero crash-lands on Earth after evacuation from his home planet and is taken in by an elderly couple who raise him as their own. But with adolescence comes a greater understanding of his superhuman powers, leading to his rebirth as a crusader for justice and defender of the American way of life. Comic-strip adventure, with Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Margot Kidder and Marlon Brando.

Predator 2 (1990) Sky Movies Aliens 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
A Los Angeles cop, working to bring down the city’s drug gangs, suspects Jamaican criminals when he discovers several of his targets killed and skinned alive. However, the culprit behind the murders reveals himself to be an alien big-game hunter – with the stealth and guile to outwit the police and criminals alike. Sci-fi sequel, starring Danny Glover, Bill Paxton, Gary Busey and Maria Conchita Alonso.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, always hold the door open for others and wear your seat belt.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 111

Heavens above! It must be the weekend!

Rising higher and higher by the minute with more and more extensions, wings and rooms, let us be your busy little workers as we tower together box after box and create a fort the likes of which have never been seen. Withstanding attacks from imaginary enemies, great floods and internal power struggles, we’ll conquer all on our quest for greatness and capturing even more celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 9th AUGUST

Cocoon (1985) More4 10:25am-12:45pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
The elderly residents of a retirement home treat themselves to an occasional dip in the pool at an abandoned house. It turns out that friendly aliens in human form are using the place to restore dormant members of their species – and energy from their cocoons is giving the old-timers a new lease of life. Ron Howard’s sci-fi drama, with Wilford Brimley, Jessica Tandy, Hume Cronyn, Don Ameche and Steve Guttenberg.

Rocky IV (1985) Channel 5 12:40pm-2:30pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The Italian Stallion agrees to help former champion Apollo Creed train for a match against a seemingly invincible boxer from the Soviet Union, only to see his friend die as a result of injuries sustained in the fight. Rocky vows to avenge him, and prepares to take on the Russian heavyweight in his own country. Drama sequel, directed by and starring Sylvester Stallone. With Dolph Lundgren, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers and Brigitte Nielsen. Edited to reduce violence.

Rocky T-Shirts

Back to the Future (1985) ITV2 6:45pm-9:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.

Back to the Future T-Shirts

Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope (1977) ITV London 9:45pm-10:40pm (55 minutes)
Farm boy Luke Skywalker is thrust into an intergalactic battle between good and evil while trying to rescue a spirited princess from the clutches of the evil Darth Vader. En route, he is helped by a cocky space pilot, a veteran warrior, two bickering robots and a hairy 8ft alien. Sci-fi adventure directed by George Lucas, with Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Alec Guinness and Peter Cushing.

Star Wars Merchandise

Billy Madison (1995) ITV2 11:45pm-1:35am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A lazy twentysomething lives off his wealthy hotel magnate father. When the old man decides to retire, he begins to question whether his layabout son is suitable to take over the family empire and issues a challenge – he must retake 12 years of school in 24 weeks, or lose everything. Comedy, starring Adam Sandler, Bridgette Wilson, Darren McGavin and Bradley Whitford.

SUNDAY 10th AUGUST

The Italian Job (1969) Film4 1:00pm-3:00pm (2 hours)
A crook puts together a motley gang to steal £4million in gold bullion from an Italian armoured car, which brings Turin to a standstill and enables the robbers to make a quick getaway in a fleet of Minis – but they end up falling foul of the Mafia along the way. Crime comedy, starring Michael Caine, Noel Coward, Benny Hill, Tony Beckley and John Le Mesurier.

Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987) Channel 5 1:10pm-2:55pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Commandant Lassard comes to the conclusion that his staff are overworked, so in an attempt to solve the problem, he assigns the clueless cops to teach a group of equally inept civilians how to combat crime. Comedy sequel, with Steve Guttenberg, Sharon Stone, Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow and David Graf.

Richie Rich (1994) 5* 5:05pm-7:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
The world’s wealthiest youngster has everything he could possibly want except friends. When his parents go missing, he must try to keep their fortune out of the clutches of a scheming executive, with the help of some less well-off children. Family comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, John Larroquette, Jonathan Hyde, Edward Herrmann, Christine Ebersole and Mike McShane.

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) BBC3 7:10pm-9:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Intrepid archaeologist Indiana Jones goes in search of the legendary Ark of the Covenant, a biblical artefact of devastating power. His quest leads him to Egypt, where the Nazis are plotting to use the Ark to further Hitler’s plans for world domination – aided by Jones’s deceitful French rival. Steven Spielberg’s action adventure, with Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Paul Freeman and John Rhys-Davies.

Memento (2000) Film4 11:05pm-1:20am (2 hours 15 minutes)
An insurance investigator suffers from short-term memory loss after an attack in which his wife was also raped and murdered. Unable to remember events for more than a few minutes, he is determined to track down the killer and relies on copious note-taking and reminders tattooed on his body to aid his mission. Christopher Nolan’s thriller, starring Guy Pearce, Carrie-Anne Moss, Joe Pantoliano and Mark Boone Jr.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember ‘I want’ doesn’t I get and to never cross your streams.

xoxo