The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 110

Halley’s comet! It’s the weekend already?!

Like a proud owner of a shiny new soft top convertible, we’ll be donning the driving gloves and sunglasses as we rev up our smooth engine and glide our way through the twisting and turning country roads with the wind in our hair in search for even more retro cinematic greatness and stopping only to gasp at the celluloid wonder they discover on the way.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 2nd AUGUST

Rocky III (1982) Channel 5 1:00pm-2:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
World heavyweight boxing champion Rocky Balboa settles down into a life of luxury – but a cloud appears on the horizon in the shape of  ambitious contender Clubber Lang, whose brutal fighting style represents a serious threat to his title. Drama, starring Sylvester Stallone, Mr T, Burgess Meredith, Talia Shire, Burt Young, Carl Weathers and Hulk Hogan.

Rocky T-Shirts

Every Which Way But Loose (1978) Channel 5 2:55pm-5:10pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A truck driver travels across America with his faithful orang-utan competing in bare knuckle fights for extra cash. He becomes smitten with a country singer who subsequently vanishes without a trace, so man and ape set off in search of her – with an enraged gang of bikers in pursuit. Action comedy, starring Clint Eastwood, Sondra Locke, Geoffrey Lewis and Beverly D’Angelo.

The Money Pit (1986) 5* 7:10pm-9:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Yuppie couple Walter and Anna buy a ramshackle old house and set about renovating it, only to see their dream home gradually turn into a nightmare. Anna also has to contend with her ex-husband, who is determined to talk her into giving their relationship another try. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Shelley Long, Alexander Godunov and Joe Mantegna.

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) E4 9:00pm-11:45pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
A reprogrammed killing machine is sent back in time to the 20th century to protect John Connor, a teenage boy whose destiny is to save the human race. After breaking John’s mother out of a mental institution, the pair set out to avert a future nuclear war – pursued by an advanced prototype terminator with shape-changing powers. Sci-fi action adventure sequel, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton,   Edward Furlong and Robert Patrick

SUNDAY 3rd AUGUST

Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach (1988) Channel 5 2:00pm-3:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
The clumsy cops visit Miami for a police chiefs’ convention to see Commandant Lassard receive an award for his retirement. Any hopes of a sun-kissed vacation are thwarted when a luggage mix-up lands them in the middle of a huge illegal arms deal. Comedy sequel, starring Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow, George Gaynes, Matt McCoy and Leslie Easterbrook.

Back to the Future (1985) ITV2 6:45pm-9:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.

Back To The Future T-Shirts

Sister Act (1992) Film4 7:05pm-9:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
Nightclub singer Deloris Van Cartier agrees to testify against her gangster boyfriend after witnessing a murder. Placed in protective custody by the authorities, she is less than pleased to discover she is expected to pose as chaste nun Sister Mary Clarence in a convent. Comedy, starring Whoopi Goldberg, Harvey Keitel, Maggie Smith, Bill Nunn and Kathy Najimy.

Pretty Woman (1990) Watch 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A ruthless millionaire hires a prostitute while on a business trip. Realising she may be useful in helping him keep up a successful appearance, he pays her to accompany him for a week as he associates with the rich and powerful – but falls in love despite their many differences. Romantic comedy, starring Richard Gere and Julia Roberts, with Ralph Bellamy and Laura San Giacomo.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to always have a plan b and be good to each other.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 109

Hulkamania! It must be the weekend!

So on a dewy wet morning amongst the weeds on the patio of an older couples cottage, let us be your slimy velocity challenged invertebrate as we sluggishly drag ourselves across paving slabs of retro movie magic. We’ll slowly devour your prize petunias with cinematic gusto before we succumb to the ever looming threat of the giant welly that is celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 26th JULY

The Love Bug (1968) Film4 4:55pm-7:10pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Herbie, an irrepressible Beetle car with a mind of its own, takes a shine to a struggling racing driver and helps him to win a string of victories on the track. However, his success attracts the attention of an unscrupulous rival competitor, who will go to any lengths to win the most important race of all. Disney comedy, starring Dean Jones, Michele Lee, Buddy Hackett and David Tomlinson.

Twister (1996) ITV London 4:30pm-6:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A storm-chaser and her estranged husband are brought together in a joint project to monitor the path of an oncoming tornado – but the pair face a race against the clock as a rival government-backed group with hi-tech resources tries to beat them to it. Action thriller, starring Helen Hunt, Bill Paxton, Cary Elwes, Jami Gertz and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Sleepy Hollow (1999) Film4 9:00pm-11:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A sceptical 18th-century detective is sent to a small hamlet supposedly terrorised by a demonic headless horseman who decapitates his victims. The investigator refuses to believe in the supernatural, convinced a human killer is behind the murders – but the legend proves to be all but too true. Tim Burton’s gothic horror, starring Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson and Christopher Walken.

Dude, Where’s My Car? (2000) Comedy Central 10:00pm-11:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Two friends wake up with the realisation they have absolutely no memory of the events of the night before. They set about retracing their steps – only to stumble across a host of crazy characters, a flock of marauding ostriches and a fanatical alien-worshipping cult. Teen comedy, with Seann William Scott, Ashton Kutcher, Jennifer Garner and Kristy Swanson.

SUNDAY 27th JULY

The Incredible Hulk (2008) ITV2 3:55pm-6:05pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A bungled experiment causes a scientist to turn into a monster whenever he gets angry. He travels the world seeking a cure for his condition, while a ruthless general is determined to capture him and use the creature as a weapon. However, one of the soldiers under the officer’s command undergoes a terrifying transformation of his own. Comic-book adventure, starring Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth and William Hurt.

Hulk T-Shirts

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) 5* 4:10pm-6:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
An eccentric but brilliant former cop sets himself up to champion the underdog – as a private eye specialising in locating missing animals. The zany detective is called in to find a kidnapped dolphin – the mascot of an American football team – and uncovers a plot involving high-level police corruption. Comedy, starring Jim Carrey, Courteney Cox, Sean Young, Tone Loc and Noble Willingham.

X-Men (2000) E4 8:00pm-10:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Super-powered outsiders Rogue and Wolverine enlist at a school for mutants which is run by a benevolent psychic professor. While there, they agree to join others with similar gifts to take on a superhuman mutant terrorist faction intent on establishing dominance over mankind. Sci-fi comic-book adventure, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Anna Paquin and Halle Berry.

X-Men T-Shirts

Rambo (2008) Channel 5 10:00pm-11:40pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
The bandana-wearing one-man army has turned his back on violence to live a quiet life in Thailand. But before long he takes up arms once again to rescue a party of missionaries who have been taken captive en route to Burma by a sadistic military officer. Action sequel, directed by and starring Sylvester Stallone. With Julie Benz and Graham McTavish.

Rambo T-Shirts

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember a one man Jacuzzi is not romantic and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 107

Cinnamon bagels! Is it the weekend?

So on a blistering hot sunny afternoon tucked away in the rear of a bustling garden party as youngsters run a muck with water pistols and elders fall foul of drunken shenanigans let us be your ever so manly expert at everything Barbeque Chef as we light our coals with retro movie magic, we’ll cook until tastefully charcoaled mouthfuls of cinematic classics before we fall into a deep meat coma of celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 12th JULY

Beethoven (1991) ITV2 2:40pm-4:25pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
An all-American family adopts a huge St Bernard, but the father is dismayed when it turns into a one-dog disaster zone. He insists the  mutt must go to a new home, but when it is kidnapped by a crooked vet, dad has a change of heart and races to the rescue. Comedy, starring  Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Oliver Platt and David Duchovny.

Ghostbusters (1984) 5* 6:50pm-9:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
Three eccentric scientists put their hi-tech gadgetry and knowledge of the paranormal to money-making use by setting up in business as  freelance ghost catchers. A musician calls them in to investigate when she sees strange creatures in her kitchen, only to end up  possessed. As the spook-hunting team members deal with an attempt to shut their operation down, they discover an evil demonic entity is  being summoned into existence and it falls to them to stop this creature from destroying the world. Supernatural comedy adventure,  starring Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Sigourney Weaver, Ernie Hudson and Rick Moranis.

Ghostbusters T-Shirts

Die Hard 2 (1990) Film4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife, but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must  battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action  thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton.

Coming to America (1988) E4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
A bored African prince defies his father’s plans for an arranged marriage and escapes to the USA to find a bride on his own terms. Comedy,  starring Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall in several roles, with James Earl Jones, Allison Dean, Eriq La Salle and Madge Sinclair.

SUNDAY 13th JULY

See No Evil, Hear No Evil (1989) Channel 5 12:55pm-2:45pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A blind man and his deaf friend go on the run to clear themselves of a trumped-up murder charge. However, all kinds of oddball characters  are on their trail, determined to get hold of a top-secret microchip that the duo do not know they have. Comedy, starring Richard Pryor,  Gene Wilder, Kevin Spacey, Joan Severance, Alan North and Anthony Zerbe.

Stand By Me (1986) Channel 5 2:45pm-4:20pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
Four 12-year-old best friends embark on a life-changing adventure in the Oregon wilderness in search of a missing teenager’s body, unaware  of the trials and triumphs that await them. Rob Reiner’s 1950s-set coming-of-age drama, based on a novella by Stephen King, starring River  Phoenix, Wil Wheaton, Jerry O’Connell, Corey Feldman, Kiefer Sutherland and Richard Dreyfuss.

Jurassic Park III (2001) ITV2 6:00pm-7:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Palaeontologist Dr Alan Grant is lured to a dinosaur-infested island by a divorced couple who offer to fund his research, unaware their  real motive is to find their missing son – and that the creatures on the island are far more intelligent than anyone suspected. Action  adventure sequel, starring Sam Neill, William H Macy, Tea Leoni and Alessandro Nivola.

Jurassic Park T-Shirts

Jurassic Park T-Shirt Jurassic Park T-Shirt

The Running Man (1987) Channel 4 10:45pm-12:40am (1 hour 55 minutes)    A helicopter pilot is framed for the murder of starving civilians – and ends up being forced to take part in a brutal TV game show in  which a succession of gadget-wielding killers hunt him on the streets of Los Angeles. Sci-fi action adventure, starring Arnold  Schwarzenegger, Yaphet Kotto, Maria Conchita Alonso and Richard Dawson.

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember to always take one down and pass it around and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 99

Maple bacon muffins! is it the weekend again?!

So on a slightly breezy summers afternoon, road tripping along country roads, as the slightest tinge of manure hits the back of your nostrils. Let us be your exceptionally happy family dog, as we hang our floppy-eared dribble tongued head out of the car window for retro movie mayhem, we’ll run in circles searching green fields and pastures for cinematic awesomeness before tiring ourselves out from digging holes looking for celluloid wonder. Phew!

Have a happy retro Weekend!

SATURDAY 17th MAY

The Princess Bride (1987) 5* 3:10pm-5:10pm (2 hours )
A cynical youngster becomes entranced by his grandfather’s magical tales, which revolve around a stable-boy’s heroic quest to rescue his lost love from the clutches of an evil prince, with the aid of a vengeance-seeking Spanish swashbuckler and his hulking sidekick. Rob Reiner’s comic fantasy adventure, with Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, Chris Sarandon, Mandy Patinkin, Peter Falk and Fred Savage.

The Iron Giant (1999) ITV2 4:10pm-5:55pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A huge robot falls from outer space and crash-lands in a small American town, terrifying the locals with its fearsome appearance. The kindly giant is befriended by a lonely youngster – but trouble looms on the horizon when a corrupt government agent sets his sights on destroying the visitor. Family animated adventure based on the children’s story by poet Ted Hughes. With the voices of Vin Diesel, Eli Marienthal, Jennifer Aniston and Harry Connick Jr.

X-Men: First Class (2011) Channel 4 9:00pm-11:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
Premiere. Telepathic mutant Charles Xavier forms the first generation of the superhero team in the 1960s. Their battle with a Nazi war criminal manipulating the world toward nuclear war gradually drives a wedge between Xavier and his ally Magneto, leading them to become deadly enemies. Superhero adventure prequel, starring James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender and Jennifer Lawrence.

X-Men T-Shirts

X-Men Wolverine Comic Cover T-Shirt X-Men T-Shirt

Top Gun (1986) Channel 4 11:35pm-1:35am (2 hours )
An arrogant pilot’s maverick flying skills earn him a place in an elite US Navy school, where he comes into conflict with a fellow student and falls for his civilian instructor. A tragedy in the air threatens to end his military career – until an international incident offers him a chance to redeem himself. Aerial action adventure, starring Tom Cruise, Kelly McGillis, Val Kilmer, Anthony Edwards and Tom Skerritt.

Top Gun T-Shirts

Top Gun Maverick T-Shirt Top Gun Maverick T-Shirt

SUNDAY 18th MAY

The Mighty Ducks (1992) ITV2 12:10pm-2:25pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A self-centred yuppie lawyer is horrified when a judge finds him guilty of drink-driving and orders him to coach a hopeless inner-city junior ice-hockey team as part of his community service. However, he comes to appreciate his new role and things finally start to look up for the team. Comedy, starring Emilio Estevez, Joss Ackland, Lane Smith and Joshua Jackson.

Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope (1977) ITV2 7:30pm-10:00pm (2 hours 30 minutes)
Farm boy Luke Skywalker is thrust into an intergalactic battle between good and evil while trying to rescue a spirited princess from the clutches of the evil Darth Vader. En route, he is helped by a cocky space pilot, a veteran warrior, two bickering robots and a hairy 8ft alien. Sci-fi adventure directed by George Lucas, with Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Alec Guinness and Peter Cushing.

Star Wars T-Shirts

Stormtrooper Selfie Star Wars T-Shirt from Chunk Star Paws T-Shirt

X2 (2003) Channel 5 7:35pm-10:00pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Mutant heroes the X-Men are forced into an uneasy alliance with arch-enemy Magneto to battle a common foe. Following an attempt on the president’s life, a sinister military scientist launches a raid to Professor Xavier’s school and hatches a plan to rid the world of all mutants. Superhero adventure sequel, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Alan Cumming, Halle Berry and Brian Cox.

The Running Man (1987) Film4 10:55pm-12:50am (1 hour 55 minutes)
A helicopter pilot is framed for the murder of starving civilians – and ends up being forced to take part in a brutal TV game show in which a succession of gadget-wielding killers hunt him on the streets of Los Angeles. Sci-fi action adventure, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Yaphet Kotto, Maria Conchita Alonso and Richard Dawson

Whatever you get up to this weekend remember pop it before you lock it and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 96

Jalapeño poppers! it looks like the Weekend!

So in a dimly lit office building. Sat with our feet up behind a desk stacked with papers of non descriptive relevance, let us be your trilby hatted, trench coat wearing private detective as we go on the snoop for retro movie greatness, we’ll search for clues of cinematic magnificence. Before we catch the culprit red handed with celluloid wonder. Aha!

Have a happy retro Weekend!

SATURDAY 26th APRIL

Masters of the Universe (1987) Sky Movies Superheroes 6:00 pm-8:00 pm (2 hours)
The heroic warrior He-Man sets out to bring an end to the evil Skeletor’s reign of terror, but is transported to Earth by a cosmic key, with his arch enemy’s henchman in hot pursuit. Fantasy adventure, starring Dolph Lundgren, Frank Langella, Meg Foster and Billy Barty.

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987) Film4 9:00 pm-10:45 pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A stressed businessman just wants to make it home to spend Thanksgiving with his family. However, when his flight is forced to land miles from its destination, he finds himself sharing a disaster-strewn journey across America with an amiable but slobbish salesman. Comedy road movie, starring Steve Martin, John Candy, Laila Robins, Kevin Bacon and Michael McKean.

The A-Team (2010) E4 9:00 pm-11:25 pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Four soldiers are sent on a top secret mission in Iraq that results in them being imprisoned for a crime they did not commit. When they learn the culprit is trying to sell equipment for producing fake currency, they break out of prison to find him and the evidence of their innocence. Action adventure based on the 1980s TV series, with Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Sharlto Copley and Quinton `Rampage’ Jackson.

Men's Khaki Mr Fool Pets Rock T-Shirt Men's A-Team Mr T Fancy Dress Costume

Halloween II (1981) 5USA 11:00 pm-1:00 am (2 hours)
In the aftermath of masked killer Michael Myers’ killing spree, survivor Laurie Strode is rushed to hospital, while the madman is still alive and still at large. As the obsessive Dr Loomis continues his pursuit of the killer, Myers goes in search of Laurie, who has a connection to his own horrific past. Horror sequel, starring Jamie Lee Curtis, Donald Pleasence and Dick Warlock.

Ladies Halloween Michael Myers Slash Back Tank Vest from Goodie Two Sleeve

SUNDAY 27th APRIL

The Land Before Time (1988) Channel 5 12:40 pm-2:10 pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
A young brontosaurus is left alone when his mother dies, so goes off in search of a legendary valley, where food is plentiful and he will be safe. He acquires a group of new friends on his journey, who help each other to avoid predators and obstacles in their way. Animated adventure, featuring the voices of Gabriel Damon and Pat Hingle.

Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey (1993) Channel 5 2:10 pm-3:45 pm (1 hour 35 minutes)
Two dogs and a cat are left in the temporary care of a friend when their owners are forced to move away. Thinking they have been abandoned, the trio hit the road in a bid to find their way home. Adventure, featuring the voices of Michael J Fox, Sally Field and Don Ameche. Kim Greist, Robert Hays and Benj Thall take the human roles.

Sister Act (1992) E4 8:00 pm-10:05 pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
Nightclub singer Deloris Van Cartier agrees to testify against her gangster boyfriend after witnessing a murder. Placed in protective custody by the authorities, she is less than pleased to discover she is expected to pose as chaste nun Sister Mary Clarence in a convent. Comedy, starring Whoopi Goldberg, Harvey Keitel, Maggie Smith, Bill Nunn and Kathy Najimy.

Bad Boys (1995) Channel 5 11:10 pm-1:20 am (2 hours 10 minutes)
Detectives Mike Lowrey and Marcus Burnett search for a $100million heroin consignment brazenly stolen by a French drug kingpin from the police evidence room. However, after a mix-up over a phone call from a potential witness, each cop has to assume the other’s identity – Lowrey becoming the henpecked family man and Burnett the playboy. Michael Bay’s action thriller, starring Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, Tea Leoni, Tcheky Karyo and Theresa Randle.

Whatever you get up to this Weekend remember to buckle up for safety and always enjoy yourselves.
xoxo