Stuffed crust! It’s only the weekend again….yep really!
Like an keen and greatly experienced pizza chef working their magic before the super-hot oven, we find ourselves once again with a whole weekends worth of retro-tastic movie toppings to select from to help layer up and bake our perfect weekend. We’ll pop on some spicy romance, some slithers of thickly cut and perfectly aged plot, a dash of action and of course plenty of cheese before nicely toasting in the oven. We’ll be left feeling full but ever so replete after stuffing ourselves on some of the best this weekend has to offer.
Have a happy retro weekend.
SATURDAY 27th JUNE
Gone with the Wind (1939) 5USA 12:30pm-5:00pm (4 hours 30 minutes)
A resourceful plantation heiress struggles to support herself through a series of challenges during the chaos of the American Civil War and the subsequent restoration, all the while maintaining a tumultuous relationship with a roguish Southern gentleman. Epic romantic drama based on Margaret Mitchell’s novel, starring Vivien Leigh, Clark Gable, Leslie Howard, Olivia de Havilland and Hattie McDaniel.
True Grit (1969) Film4 2:55pm-5:40pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
One-eyed, over-the-hill US Marshal Rooster Cogburn reluctantly agrees to help a girl track down her father’s killer. The quest is complicated by a Texas Ranger, who is also on the murderer’s trail, and a host of villains who have few qualms about disposing of the meddling youngster and her protector. Western, starring an Oscar-winning John Wayne alongside Jeff Corey, Kim Darby, Glen Campbell, Robert Duvall and Dennis Hopper.
The Addams Family (1991) E4 4:00pm-6:00pm (2 hours)
Creepy couple Morticia and Gomez find their unconventional life threatened by a man claiming to be a long-lost relative. When they welcome him with open arms, they fall prey to a plot that could cost them their ancestral home and the family fortune. Black comedy based on the 1960s TV series, starring Anjelica Huston, Raul Julia, Christopher Lloyd, Christina Ricci, Jimmy Workman and Carel Struycken.
Fun Fact: The entire Addams’ house was built for just $100,000.
Scooby-Doo (2002) ITV London 4:20pm-6:00pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
The hapless hound and his chums reunite after a bitter break-up to solve a baffling mystery in the ghost-themed tourist resort of Spooky Island, whose owner is convinced he has a genuine haunting on his hands. Live-action comedy adventure based on the cartoon series, starring Sarah Michelle Gellar, Matthew Lillard, Freddie Prinze Jr, Linda Cardellini and Rowan Atkinson.
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007) ITV London 7:00pm-9:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
The young wizard struggles to convince his fellow sorcerers that the evil Lord Voldemort has returned to life. When Hogwarts headmaster Dumbledore is ousted in favour of a sadistic replacement, Harry realises he must take matters into his own hands, uniting his fellow pupils to form a secret army and training them for the inevitable confrontation to come. Fantasy adventure sequel, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Gary Oldman, Michael Gambon and Alan Rickman.
Harry Potter Merchandise
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) Movie Mix 9:00pm-10:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A velvet-clad, sex-crazed secret agent from the 1960s agrees to be put into a state of suspended animation after his arch-enemy escapes justice. Thirty years later he is defrosted to do battle with the power-mad villain again, but the mission proves nearly as daunting for him as getting to grips with 1990s social values. Spoof spy adventure, with Mike Myers, Elizabeth Hurley, Mimi Rogers, Michael York and Robert Wagner.
The Wicker Man (1973) ITV4 11:30pm-1:20am (1 hour 50 minutes)
A devoutly Christian Scottish police officer travels to a remote island to investigate the disappearance of a missing girl. As his investigations are disrupted at every turn, the detective is horrified to see the population have embraced an ancient pagan lifestyle, and begins to fear they may intend to sacrifice the child in an occult ritual. Horror, starring Edward Woodward, Christopher Lee and Britt Ekland.
SUNDAY 28th JUNE
The Land Before Time (1988) Channel 5 12:05pm-1:20pm (1 hour 15 minutes)
A young brontosaurus is left alone when his mother dies, so goes off in search of a legendary valley, where food is plentiful and he will be safe. He acquires a group of new friends on his journey, who help each other to avoid predators and obstacles in their way. Animated adventure, featuring the voices of Gabriel Damon and Pat Hingle.
Big (1988) Film4 1:00pm-3:15pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
A boy ridiculed for his size makes a wish on a fairground machine to become bigger – only to wake up as a 30-year-old man. Driven from his home by his terrified mother, the bewildered youngster trapped in a grown-up body makes his way to New York, where he rises high in the ranks of a toy manufacturing company and applies his youthful enthusiasm to the complexities of adult life. Comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins and Robert Loggia.
The Princess Bride (1987) Channel 5 1:20pm-3:15pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A cynical youngster becomes entranced by his grandfather’s magical tales, which revolve around a stable-boy’s heroic quest to rescue his lost love from the clutches of an evil prince, with the aid of a vengeance-seeking Spanish swashbuckler and his hulking sidekick. Rob Reiner’s comic fantasy adventure, with Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, Chris Sarandon, Mandy Patinkin, Peter Falk and Fred Savage.
Edward Scissorhands (1990) Channel 4 2:30pm-4:35pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A reclusive genius creates a boy but dies before completing him, leaving his brainchild with scissor-like blades in place of hands. A kindly woman from a nearby suburb takes pity on the lonely figure and welcomes him into her home. He quickly becomes a hit in the neighbourhood – but then his new friends start to turn against him. Tim Burton’s fantasy, starring Johnny Depp, Winona Ryder, Dianne Wiest and Vincent Price.
Edward Scissorhands Merchandise
Despicable Me (2010) ITV2 3:50pm-5:45pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A criminal mastermind hopes to seal his reputation as the greatest villain of them all by stealing the moon. First he needs to get his hands on a shrinking ray owned by a rival evil genius, and adopts three orphan girls to help him – but finds that fatherhood brings out his long-buried caring side. Animated comedy, with the voices of Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand and Julie Andrews.
Beetlejuice (1988) Channel 5 5:10pm-6:55pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
Recently deceased couple Adam and Barbara Maitland enlist the professional services of a hard-boiled veteran ghost to scare away the obnoxious yuppie family who have moved into their former home. Tim Burton’s supernatural comedy, starring Michael Keaton, Geena Davis, Alec Baldwin, Winona Ryder, Jeffrey Jones and Catherine O’Hara.
Okay okay soooo not strictly retro BUT don’t miss….
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012) ITV2 5:45pm-9:00pm (3 hours 15 minutes)
Unassuming hobbit Bilbo Baggins is pulled out of his comfortable life when Gandalf the wizard volunteers him for a dangerous quest. He joins a party of dwarves who are on a mission to reclaim their lost homeland, which has been taken over by a dragon. The first part of Peter Jackson’s fantasy adventure trilogy based on JRR Tolkien’s novel, starring Martin Freeman, Ian McKellen and Richard Armitage.
The Hobbit Merchandise
Dirty Dancing (1987) Channel 5 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A dance instructor at a 1960s resort hotel fears his career will be jeopardised when his regular partner is forced to pull out of an important show in which they are due to perform. Luckily, a naive teenager is happy to step in, and is treated to a whirlwind holiday education in life, love and expressing herself. Romantic drama, starring Patrick Swayze, Jennifer Grey and Jerry Orbach.
Fun Fact: In the scene where Johnny and Baby are practicing dancing, and she keeps laughing when he runs his arm down hers, it was not part of the scene; she was actually laughing and his frustration was genuine. They left it because it was effective. Her falling over in this scene was unplanned too.
Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember where you parked and that the worst part is always getting your shoulders under.