The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown!

What’s that coming over the hill? Is it dangerous? Is it spectacular? Is it going to change our lives forever? Welll… YES as it’s this weeks retro movie rundown!

With the sounds of arcade machines ringing all around us, we find ourselves gazing down the 60 feet long glassy wood lane towards our ten, nervous pins standing tall. Selecting our ball of choice which has the perfect weight and grip size, we take aim and begin our swift but perfectly calculated throw before sending our ball hurling towards our victims.

SATURDAY 10th February

.
Look Who’s Talking
(1989) 5STAR 11:25am-1:30pm
Pregnant Mollie is dumped by her boyfriend, and sets out after the baby’s birth to find a surrogate father for her infant son Mikey, who comments on proceedings through a wisecracking inner monologue. Mikey is confident the cab driver who helped deliver him is the perfect man for the job – but his mother is less than convinced. Comedy, with John Travolta, Kirstie Alley and the voice of Bruce Willis.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown!

Deck the halls and pour some drinks! With a healthy sized mince pie and a snifter of mulled wine, we find ourselves all of a sudden… in Christmas! With festive lights bringing our local streets to life and the smell of freshly baked goods with cinnamon lingering in the air, we quickly begin to wrap presents and write cards as we get festive season ready!

SATURDAY 16th December

.
Volcano
(1997) Film4 2:45pm-4:50pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A river of molten lava spews from an erupting volcano onto the streets of Los Angeles, prompting the head of a crisis agency to team up with an intrepid scientist in a frantic and dangerous bid to save the city’s residents. Disaster thriller, starring Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, Gaby Hoffmann, Keith David and Don Cheadle.

The Return of the Musketeers (1989) Film4 4:50pm-6:55pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
D’Artagnan reunites his former companions to save the queen of France from the scheming Cardinal Mazarin, and embark on a mission to England to prevent the beheading of Charles I. Meanwhile, the daughter of a former vanquished enemy is seeking revenge on the four heroes. Swashbuckling adventure sequel, with Oliver Reed, Michael York, Frank Finlay, Richard Chamberlain, Kim Cattrall and Roy Kinnear, who died during filming.

Liar Liar (1997) ITV2 6:10pm-7:55pm
A lawyer, whose underhand ploys to win cases leave him little time to see his son, discovers he is incapable of lying after the boy’s birthday wish makes his dad tell only the truth. However, this causes a host of problems as the attorney tries to muddle his way through a high-profile divorce settlement. Comedy, with Jim Carrey, Maura Tierney, Justin Cooper, Jennifer Tilly and Cary Elwes.

Men in Black (1997) Film4 9:00pm-10:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A streetwise cop is enlisted by a top-secret government force dedicated to policing alien visitors to Earth, teaming up with a veteran agent just as a body-swapping extraterrestrial giant insect begins a reign of terror throughout New York City. Sci-fi comedy, starring Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Linda Fiorentino, Rip Torn and Vincent D’Onofrio.

Rush Hour (1998) Dave 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
A Hong Kong detective is sent to Los Angeles to investigate a kidnapping, but the local authorities worry that his presence in America might spark an international incident, and assign a loud-mouthed and troublesome cop to keep an eye on him. However, the new partnership proves an explosive combination. Comedy adventure, starring Jackie Chan, Chris Tucker, Ken Leung, Tom Wilkinson and Chris Penn.

Dirty Dancing (1987) 5STAR 9:00pm-11:05pm
A dance instructor at a 1960s resort hotel fears his career will be jeopardised when his regular partner is forced to pull out of an important show in which they are due to perform. Luckily, a naive teenager is happy to step in, and is treated to a whirlwind holiday education in life, love and expressing herself. Romantic drama, starring Patrick Swayze, Jennifer Grey and Jerry Orbach.

Dirty Dancing Merchandise

Navy Seals (1990) ITV4 9:00pm-11:20pm
The US Navy’s elite commando force embarks on a dangerous covert mission to rescue hostages from an Arab terrorist in Beirut. However, the assignment proves far more serious than expected when they realise their enemies have acquired powerful stolen missiles. Action adventure, starring Charlie Sheen, Michael Biehn, Joanne Whalley, Bill Paxton and Rick Rossovich.

The Bone Collector (1999) Sony Movie Channel 11:00pm-1:35am
A quadriplegic ex-cop is saved from the brink of suicide by a rookie female officer needing his expertise to form a psychological profile of a serial killer. The murderer is posing as a cab driver and terrorising Manhattan, and has a gruesome habit of taking trophies from his victims’ bodies. Thriller, starring Denzel Washington, Angelina Jolie, Michael Rooker, Mike McGlone, Luis Guzman and Queen Latifah.

SUNDAY 17th December

.
Jack Frost (1998) ITV2 2:00pm-4:05pm
A rock musician who realises he is spending too much time away from his family is killed in a car accident while travelling home for the festive season. The following year his spirit takes on the form of a snowman, made by his son, allowing them to spend one last Christmas together. Fantasy drama, starring Michael Keaton, Kelly Preston, Joseph Cross and Mark Addy.

Toy Story 2 (1999) BBC1 2:50pm-4:20pm (1 hour 30 minutes)
Cowboy doll Woody is stolen by an unscrupulous toy collector, who knows he is worth a fortune as a collectible, prompting fearless Space Ranger Buzz Lightyear to lead a daring across-town mission to rescue him. However, Woody is tempted to spend his life languishing in the safety of a museum rather than face the prospect of his owner growing up. Animated sequel, featuring the voices of Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Joan Cusack and Kelsey Grammer.

Toy Story Merchandise

Jingle All the Way (1996) Channel 4 3:05pm-4:50pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A workaholic father tries to make up for his perpetual absence from home by promising to buy his son a hugely popular action figure for Christmas – little realising every other father in town has the same idea. Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sinbad, Jake Lloyd, Rita Wilson, Robert Conrad and Phil Hartman.

Miracle on 34th Street (1994) Channel 4 5:50pm-8:00pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
A woman raises her six-year-old daughter to believe that Santa Claus does not exist, but they both have a change of heart after meeting a department store Father Christmas who claims to be the man himself. When the kindly fellow is accused of being a charlatan, his new friends engage a lawyer to prove his true identity. Remake of the 1947 family drama, with Richard Attenborough, Elizabeth Perkins, Mara Wilson and Dylan McDermott.

The Shadow (1994) Sony Movie Channel 6:35pm-9:00pm
A masked hero uses his mysterious mental powers to fight evil and faces his deadliest enemy in the shape of a descendant of warlord Genghis Khan, whose formidable psychic abilities are a match for his adversary’s and who is bent on annihilating New York with a nuclear device. Superhero adventure set in the 1930s, starring Alec Baldwin, John Lone, Penelope Ann Miller, Peter Boyle, Ian McKellen and Tim Curry.

Scrooge (1970) Channel 5 6:45pm-9:00pm
Hard-hearted Victorian miser Ebenezer Scrooge refuses to join in with the spirit of the festive season – until a succession of spectral visitors turn up to teach him the error of his ways. Musical adaptation of Charles Dickens’ classic A Christmas Carol, starring Albert Finney, Alec Guinness, Kenneth More, Edith Evans and Paddy Stone.

Species II (1998) ITV4 9:00pm-10:55pm
An astronaut returns from a mission transformed into a deadly alien and determined to propagate his species. To combat the threat, scientists resurrect a female creature of the same race – but they have no way of knowing where her loyalties will lie. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Natasha Henstridge, Michael Madsen, Marg Helgenberger and Mykelti Williamson.

Die Hard (1988) Channel 4 10:00pm-12:35am (2 hours 35 minutes)
New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom – and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia.

Sleepy Hollow (1999) Channel 5 11:10pm-12:55am (1 hour 45 minutes)
A sceptical 18th-century detective is sent to a small hamlet supposedly terrorised by a demonic headless horseman who decapitates his victims. The investigator refuses to believe in the supernatural, convinced a human killer is behind the murders – but the legend proves to be all too true. Tim Burton’s gothic horror, starring Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson and Christopher Walken.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to take a break and grab a cuppa. You won’t regret it.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown!

Jingle all the way! Another festive retro movie rundown has just landed on our roof and is here to spread some cheer!

With our postage sacks bulging like a hamster’s cheeks, we’re busy whizzing around from shelf to shelf like the Elves we are grabbing and wrapping all the toys and games ready for the big day. With a skip and a song as we go, we’ll send everyone’s presents merrily on their way ready to be tucked under bright and bold trees as they glisten in the night.

SATURDAY 9th December

.
Miracle on 34th Street
(1947) Film4 11:00am-1:00pm (2 hours)
When a popular New York department store Santa Claus is placed in an asylum for claiming to be the genuine article, a crusading city lawyer takes on the case, determined to prove the man’s sanity. Christmas drama, starring Edmund Gwenn, Maureen O’Hara, Natalie Wood, John Payne, Gene Lockhart, Porter Hall and William Frawley.

Flight of the Navigator (1986) Film4 1:00pm-2:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A boy mysteriously disappears in 1978, and is found eight years later, having not aged a day. He escapes being experimented on by government scientists by taking off in a crashed alien spaceship. With the help of the robot pilot, he tries to find out what has happened to him and if he can get back home. Sci-fi adventure, starring Joey Cramer and Veronica Cartwright, with the voice of Paul Reubens.

Wild Wild West (1999) Dave 3:00pm-5:00pm (2 hours)
A government agent teams up with a gadget-mad master of disguise to investigate the disappearance of several scientists. Their search leads them to an evil genius who is plotting to kill the US president with some bizarre inventions of his own. Sci-fi Western comedy, starring Will Smith, Kevin Kline, Kenneth Branagh, Salma Hayek and Ted Levine.

Live and Let Die (1973) ITV4 6:35pm-9:00pm
James Bond’s investigation into the murder of three British agents leads him to a connection between the dictator of a Caribbean island and a notorious Harlem drug kingpin – along with a plot to flood America with limitless supplies of free heroin. Spy adventure, with Roger Moore in his first appearance as 007, alongside Yaphet Kotto and Jane Seymour.

Octopussy (1983) ITV4 9:00pm-11:40pm
James Bond investigates the mysterious death of a British agent in East Berlin, a mission that leads him to a glamorous, international jewel thief. He discovers one of her criminal cohorts, an Indian gangster, is in league with a crazed Soviet general who plans to heat up the Cold War by detonating a nuclear bomb in an American Air Force Base. Spy adventure, with Roger Moore, Maud Adams, Steven Berkoff and Louis Jourdan.

James Bond Merchandise

Renegades (1989) ITV4 11:40pm-1:50am
An undercover cop infiltrating a criminal gang is involved in a diamond heist that ends in murder. As he pursues the criminals and tries to expose corruption in his own department, he makes an unlikely ally of a Native American on a quest to recover a sacred tribal artefact stolen by the crooks. Action adventure, with Kiefer Sutherland and Lou Diamond Phillips.

Shaun of the Dead (2004) ITV 11:05pm-12:50am (1 hour 45 minutes)
An unambitious 29-year-old man recently dumped and trapped in the job from hell decides to get his life back on track. Unfortunately, he has to put his plans on hold when zombies rise from their graves and stalk the streets of London to feast on the living. Comedy horror, starring Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Kate Ashfield, Dylan Moran, Lucy Davis, Bill Nighy and Penelope Wilton.

SUNDAY 10th December

.
Junior
(1994) ITV 12:00pm-2:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A fertility expert pioneers a treatment enabling men to become pregnant and carry babies to full term. When the authorities cancel funding for the research, he decides to test it on himself, but gives little thought to how difficult it will be to keep it a secret. The situation is further complicated when he starts to fall for the woman whose child he is carrying. Comedy, with Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito, Emma Thompson and Frank Langella.

Toy Story (1995) BBC1 3:35pm-4:50pm (1 hour 15 minutes)
A jealous string-pulled cowboy doll’s status as his owner’s favourite plaything is threatened by the arrival of a charismatic hi-tech astronaut figure, who refuses to believe he is simply a toy. However, the rivals are forced to work together when they are left stranded in the outside world. Pixar animated adventure, featuring the voices of Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Don Rickles and Jim Varney.

Toy Story Merchandise

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) ITV4 5:25pm-8:00pm
James Bond’s investigation into the death of a world-renowned scientist working on solar technology draws him into a battle of wits with a stealthy assassin, who dispatches his victims with a golden bullet and has the British secret agent next in his sights. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Christopher Lee, Britt Ekland and Maud Adams.

Godzilla (1998) Sony Movie Channel 6:10pm-9:00pm
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

A View to a Kill (1985) ITV4 8:00pm-10:40pm
James Bond clashes with a megalomaniac international businessman plotting a global takeover of the computer industry by engineering a devastating earthquake in California’s Silicon Valley – and killing millions in the process. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore in his final appearance as 007 alongside Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Tanya Roberts and Patrick Macnee.

In the Line of Fire (1993) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:45pm
An ageing secret service agent, tormented by his failure to save the life of John F Kennedy in 1963, is drawn into a battle of wits with a sinister CIA-trained assassin out to kill the current president. As the day of reckoning draws closer, the agent’s nerves are tested to the limit – and nothing seems to be going his way. Wolfgang Petersen’s thriller, starring Clint Eastwood, John Malkovich, Rene Russo and Dylan McDermott.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, spare some time to kick back, put your feet up and tuck into a box of chocolates and a good film. You won’t regret it.

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown!

Kris Kringle! Another retro movie weekend is here and is coming jam-packed with classic movie goodness!

With a brush and a scrape, we find ourselves frantically chipping away at the nights frost which has decided to make a semi-permanent home on our windscreen. With our fingers and toes quickly matching the temperature of the ice itself, we’ll slowly begin to reveal the clear shiny glass beneath the ice blanket, watching our breath slowly rise and fade away into the clear sky.

SATURDAY 1st December

.
The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) Film4 1:00pm-2:45pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
An embittered Victorian miser hates the festive season and people in general, but on Christmas Eve, the ghosts of his former business partners, the Marley brothers, visit him in the night. They warn him three spirits are coming to make him change his ways by showing him visions of the past, the present and what the future may hold. Comedy, with Michael Caine and Steven Mackintosh alongside the puppet characters.

Muppets Merchandise

Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) ITV3 2:45pm-5:00pm
An impulsive elf walks out on Father Christmas during the hectic preparations for the festive season, and heads for New York determined to make a name for himself. However, he falls into the clutches of an evil toy manufacturer, who has a devilish money-making plan up his sleeve. Family fantasy adventure, starring Dudley Moore, John Lithgow, David Huddleston, Burgess Meredith and Judy Cornwell.

Superman (1978) ITV4 3:25pm-6:20pm
A fledgling superhero crash-lands on Earth after evacuation from his home planet and is taken in by an elderly couple who raise him as their own. But with adolescence comes a greater understanding of his superhuman powers, leading to his rebirth as a crusader for justice and defender of the American way of life. Comic-strip adventure, with Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Margot Kidder and Marlon Brando.

Superman Merchandise

Nacho Libre (2006) ITV4 6:20pm-8:10pm
A portly Mexican friar working as a cook in an orphanage adopts the guise of a masked wrestler. He teams up with a thief and enters a tournament hoping to win enough money to sort out the monastery’s financial problems, feed the kids under his care and impress the nun he is in love with. Comedy, starring Jack Black and Ana de la Reguera.

The Nutty Professor (1996) ITV4 8:10pm-10:00pm
An obese, terminally shy professor invents a potion that transforms him into a slim, loud-mouthed charmer. His new streamlined self immediately sets out to woo the woman of his dreams – but soon starts to ride roughshod over everything he used to care about. Remake of the 1963 Jerry Lewis comedy, starring Eddie Murphy, Jada Pinkett Smith, James Coburn and Larry Miller.

The Bone Collector (1999) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-11:35pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
A quadriplegic ex-cop is saved from the brink of suicide by a rookie female officer needing his expertise to form a psychological profile of a serial killer. The murderer is posing as a cab driver and terrorising Manhattan, and has a gruesome habit of taking trophies from his victims’ bodies. Thriller, starring Denzel Washington, Angelina Jolie, Michael Rooker, Mike McGlone, Luis Guzman and Queen Latifah.

Lethal Weapon 2 (1989) Dave 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Headstrong cop Martin Riggs and his cautious partner Roger Murtaugh stumble across a plot by a South African diplomat to launder drugs money by shipping gold coins into the US via his embassy. Protected by diplomatic immunity, the crook looks certain to evade the law – while his chief henchman has a connection to Riggs’ traumatic past. Action thriller sequel, with Mel Gibson, Danny Glover, Joe Pesci, Joss Ackland, Derrick O’Connor and Patsy Kensit.

Rambo III (1988) ITV 10:35pm-12:25am (1 hour 50 minutes)
Vietnam veteran John Rambo turns down a request from his old colonel to join a mission in Soviet-occupied Afghanistan. However, when the officer is captured, Rambo sets off to save him, joining the Mujahedeen rebels in fighting against the Russian invaders. Action adventure sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Kurtwood Smith, Marc de Jonge and Sasson Gabai.

Rambo TShirts

SUNDAY 2nd December

.
Wild Wild West (1999) Dave 4:00pm-6:00pm (2 hours)
A government agent teams up with a gadget-mad master of disguise to investigate the disappearance of several scientists. Their search leads them to an evil genius who is plotting to kill the US president with some bizarre inventions of his own. Sci-fi Western comedy, starring Will Smith, Kevin Kline, Kenneth Branagh, Salma Hayek and Ted Levine.

Flight of the Navigator (1986) Film4 3:15pm-5:05pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A boy mysteriously disappears in 1978, and is found eight years later, having not aged a day. He escapes being experimented on by government scientists by taking off in a crashed alien spaceship. With the help of the robot pilot, he tries to find out what has happened to him and if he can get back home. Sci-fi adventure, starring Joey Cramer and Veronica Cartwright, with the voice of Paul Reubens.

Shrek (2001) Channel 4 5:50pm-7:30pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Anti-social ogre Shrek resolves to stop an evil ruler from banishing fairy-tale characters to his swampland home. However, the reluctant hero ends up forced to rescue the beautiful Princess Fiona from a castle guarded by a dragon, aided only by a wisecracking donkey. Animated comedy, with the voices of Mike Myers, John Lithgow, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy and Vincent Cassel.

Mars Attacks! (1996) ITV4 12:30am-2:40am
The inhabitants of Earth leap into action to repel an impending invasion by a seemingly invincible Martian army, which possesses superior weaponry, a thirst for destruction and a wicked sense of humour. Tim Burton’s sci-fi comedy, starring Jack Nicholson, Glenn Close, Pierce Brosnan, Annette Bening, Natalie Portman, Danny DeVito and Tom Jones.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, stay warm and keep cooooool!

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown!

Yay! Weekend time again folks, Thank the god of weekends because they have packed it to the brim for us movie loving geeks. From adventuring archaeologists, teenage wizardry, shrimp boat captains, teenage romantics and firemen, it’s a fine time to stay in with us so put your feet up and completely immerse yourself in this weekends retro extravaganza. Enjoy yourself folks!

SATURDAY 18th November

.
Beethoven’s 2nd (1993) ITV2 2:00pm-3:50pm
The slobbering St Bernard is now grown up and in love with his beautiful sweetheart Missy. Together they bring a litter of puppies into the world – but have to go on the defensive when Missy’s owner, the evil Regina, sets out to steal them for herself. Comedy sequel, starring Charles Grodin, Bonnie Hunt, Chris Penn, Nicholle Tom and Christopher Castle.

The Fifth Element (1997) 5STAR 4:40pm-7:10pm
In the 23rd century, the world faces destruction from a seemingly unstoppable force of pure evil. Meanwhile, a New York cab driver encounters a mysterious woman destined to save the Earth from its fate, and has to protect her from a scheming arms dealer and a horde of alien mercenaries. Luc Besson’s sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis, Milla Jovovich and Gary Oldman.

Dante’s Peak (1997) Film4 6:55pm-9:00pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A vulcanologist’s suspicions that a long-dormant volcano is about to erupt turn out to be true, prompting him to race against time to save the community standing in its way – and clash with local government officials weighing his predictions against the loss in tourism revenue. Disaster movie, starring Pierce Brosnan, Linda Hamilton, Elizabeth Hoffman and Charles Hallahan.

Stephen King’s It (1990) Sony Movie Channel 9:00pm-12:50am (3 hours 50 minutes)
A boy’s murder alerts seven friends that a supernatural enemy they fought as children has returned. But after 30 years apart, the reluctant heroes struggle to overcome their worst fears and find the courage necessary to defeat such an inhuman force. Horror, starring Tim Curry, Richard Thomas, Tim Reid, John Ritter and Olivia Hussey.

Darkman (1990) Film4 9:00pm-11:00pm (2 hours)
A scientist working on synthetic skin is horribly disfigured and left for dead by a criminal gang. Now unable to feel pain, he continues his research, creating artificial faces that will last for only a short time. He uses these disguises to aid him in taking revenge on those who mutilated him – while also using a mask of his own face to see the girlfriend who thinks he died. Thriller, starring Liam Neeson and Frances McDormand.

First Blood (1982) ITV 10:55pm-12:40am (1 hour 45 minutes)
Vietnam veteran John Rambo is wrongfully arrested in a backwoods town and tested to the limits of his endurance by a brutal deputy. Rambo escapes from his cell and heads out to the woods, and with the forces of the law in hot pursuit he finally has the chance to fight them on his own terms. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, Brian Dennehy, Richard Crenna and David Caruso.

Aliens (1986) Film4 11:00pm-2:05am (3 hours 5 minutes)
Lone survivor Ripley is rescued in deep space decades after an alien creature wiped out her ship’s entire crew. She is recruited to accompany a military expedition to a colony on the planet where she first encountered the monster, only to find the aliens have been reproducing and there are now hordes of them. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller sequel, with Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn and Lance Henriksen.

SUNDAY 19th November

.
Carry On Screaming (1966) ITV 11:05am-12:55pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A sinister boffin, his sultry sister and two genetic misfits kidnap innocent women from spooky Hocomb Woods and turn them into mannequins – but two dim-witted detectives look set to throw a spanner in the works. Comedy horror, starring Kenneth Williams, Fenella Fielding, Harry H Corbett, Charles Hawtrey, Jim Dale, Joan Sims and Bernard Bresslaw.

A Walk in the Clouds (1995) Sony Movie Channel 4:10pm-6:25pm
A salesman, recently returned from the Second World War, meets a pregnant woman who is anxious about going back to live on her strict parents’ vineyard, so he agrees to pose as her husband to calm the waters. But once there, he is reluctant to give up the pleasures of the simple life, despite having a real wife back home. Romantic drama, starring Keanu Reeves, Aitana Sanchez-Gijon and Anthony Quinn.

Fun Fact: Keanu Reeves was injured during a friendly game of hockey with his friends during spare time. His lip was split, requiring six stitches. In his next scheduled scene, a love scene with Debra Messing, he was quoted as saying to her: “please don’t hurt me.”

Men in Black II (2002) Channel 4 5:20pm-7:00pm (1 hour 40 minutes)
Agent J investigates the unauthorised landing of a spacecraft and discovers a malevolent alien disguised as a lingerie model is on the verge of destroying humanity. His only hope of stopping her diabolical plot is to restore the memory of his retired partner K – but his former mentor takes more than a little convincing. Sci-fi comedy sequel, directed by Barry Sonnenfeld, starring Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Rosario Dawson, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville, Rip Torn and Tony Shalhoub.

Cliffhanger (1993) ITV4 9:00pm-11:15pm
A retired mountain rescue expert is drawn into a battle of wits with a psychopathic criminal searching for a $100million fortune lost in the Rockies – and puts his life on the line as he negotiates the treacherous mountains in a bid to stay one step ahead of the crook. Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, John Lithgow, Janine Turner and Michael Rooker.

Hard to Kill (1990) ITV4 11:15pm-1:20am
A gang of drug dealers attacks the home of a Los Angeles cop, leaving him in a coma and his wife dead. Seven years later, he regains consciousness and gets ready to exact a grisly payback on the murderers. As he embarks on his deadly mission of vengeance, he learns his son also survived the attack, but was told he is dead. Thriller, with Steven Seagal, Kelly LeBrock, Bill Sadler and Frederick Coffin.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, don’t forget to wipe your feet and always keep both shoes together when not wearing them. It’s a nightmare otherwise.