The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown – 437

Pining our way through the week like a button up a vacuum cleaner, we’re whizzing our way into another retro movie-filled weekend with plenty of action, comedy, and drama!

SATURDAY 24th July

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) Film4 3:00pm-6:05pm
The heroic Autobots discover that a spaceship from their own planet crashed into the moon decades ago, carrying their former leader and an incredibly powerful device. They must fight to defend the human race as their enemies the Decepticons plot to use this machine to rebuild their own world and destroy the Earth. Sci-fi adventure sequel, with Shia LaBeouf, Josh Duhamel and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

Transformers merch

Transformers Optimus Prime Ecru T-Shirt

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Antz (1998) ITV2 3:15pm-5:00pm
A neurotic worker ant passes himself off as a soldier to impress a princess. However, he provokes a jealously ambitious general with an accidental act of heroism – so he and his beloved decide to flee the brutal colony and go in search of the promised land of Insectopia. Animated comedy, with the voices of Woody Allen, Sharon Stone, Gene Hackman and Sylvester Stallone.

Father of the Bride (1991) GREAT! movies 4:55pm-7:05pm
A doting dad is taken aback when his daughter announces she is getting married, and is thrown into a whirlwind of increasingly complicated wedding plans, a struggle to live up to the expectations of his wealthy future in-laws and the sad realisation that his little girl has grown up. A remake of the 1950s comedy, with Steve Martin, Diane Keaton, Kimberly Williams and Martin Short.

Mr Bean’s Holiday (2007) ITV2 5:00pm-6:45pm
The bumbling fool wins first prize in the church raffle – a trip to France and a video camera. His travels cause chaos as he disrupts a film shoot in Cannes, to the fury of its megalomaniac director, and is then accused of kidnapping a youngster. Comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, Willem Dafoe, Emma de Caunes and Max Baldry.

The Karate Kid (2010) Film4 6:05pm-9:00pm
An American youngster goes to live in China with his mother, where he becomes an outsider and falls foul of the local bullies. He receives help from the kindly school caretaker, who turns out to be a kung fu master and offers to train the boy to defend himself. Martial arts drama, with Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan.

Cobra Kai merch

Cobra Kai Dojo Door Mat

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Outbreak (1995) 5STAR 6:25pm-9:00pm
An expert in infectious diseases races against time to find a cure for a rapidly fatal airborne virus that is wiping out the population of a small town, and is threatening to turn into a pandemic. However, his task is hampered by senior military men, who are bent on burning down the town and incinerating the virus with it, regardless of any casualties. Thriller, with Dustin Hoffman, Rene Russo, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Spacey and Donald Sutherland.

Deep Impact (1998) E4 6:40pm-9:00pm
A TV reporter investigating a presidential misdemeanour stumbles on evidence that a comet is on a collision course with Earth, threatening the future of the human race. Meanwhile, an astronaut prepares to lead his crew on a do-or-die mission to intercept the danger. Sci-fi drama, starring Robert Duvall, Tea Leoni, Morgan Freeman and Elijah Wood.

School of Rock (2003) ITV2 6:45pm-9:00pm
A slobbish guitarist dreams of stardom, but his hopes are dashed when the other members of his band kick him out. Struggling to make ends meet, he takes a job as a supply teacher at an exclusive private school, and sets about moulding his pupils into rock gods. Comedy from director Richard Linklater, starring Jack Black, Joan Cusack, Mike White and Sarah Silverman.

The Cable Guy (1996) GREAT! movies 7:05pm-9:00pm
A man makes the mistake of engaging a cable TV installer in conversation in a ploy to get all the channels for free. However, the manic repairman shows an invincible determination to be his new best friend – and does not take kindly to rejection. Comedy directed by Ben Stiller, starring Jim Carrey, Matthew Broderick and George Segal.

Air Force One (1997) 5STAR 9:00pm-11:35pm
The American president is forced to take drastic measures to save his family when their plane is hijacked by Russian terrorists demanding the release of a jailed radical general. Meanwhile, the vice president tries to manage the crisis from Washington and has to decide whether to shoot the aircraft down. Action thriller, starring Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Glenn Close, Dean Stockwell and William H Macy.

The Fast and the Furious (2001) ITV 11:15pm-1:10am
In a move to identify suspected hijackers, an undercover police officer infiltrates the high-octane world of illegal late-night street racing by rival gangs. He is befriended by a champion driver, but when he also forms a bond with the racer’s sister, he is pitched into a conflict of loyalties. Thriller, starring Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez and Jordana Brewster.

SUNDAY 25th July

The Simpsons Movie (2007) Film4 4:50pm-6:35pm
Homer unwittingly pollutes Lake Springfield, so the US government decides to isolate the city underneath a giant dome. The Simpsons manage to escape and plan to start a new life in Alaska – but learn Springfield is about to be destroyed, and return to save their friends. With the voices of Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright and Yeardley Smith.

Simpsons merchandise

Women's Simpsons Lisa Set of Two Shortie Pyjamas

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Home Alone (1990) E4 4:55pm-7:00pm
A boy has to fend for himself when he is accidentally left behind after his family jets off to Paris for Christmas. The youngster initially enjoys his freedom, but is soon forced to resort to ingenious booby traps to defend the family home from two dim-witted burglars. Comedy, starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O’Hara and John Candy.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004) ITV 6:20pm-9:00pm
The teenage wizard is alarmed to learn a dangerous fugitive sorcerer is searching for him. Meanwhile, a new teacher at Hogwarts helps the bespectacled youngster to protect himself from the school’s soul-sucking security guards. The third in the fantasy adventure series, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Gary Oldman, David Thewlis, Michael Gambon, Robbie Coltrane and Alan Rickman.

Harry Potter gifts

Wizards Welcome Muggles Tolerated Door Mat

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Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985) ITV4 7:10pm-9:00pm
America’s most inept cops graduate and are let loose on the streets – under the command of an unscrupulous lieutenant whose promotion depends on their failure. Fortunately for him, their unique brand of policing actually leads to an increase in the crime rate. Comedy sequel, starring Steve Guttenberg, Bubba Smith, David Graf and Michael Winslow.

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, make it rock!