The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 105

Herman’s Hermits! It must be the weekend!

So under a rung of gently flickering fluorescent lights, inside a heaving family packed restaurant, at the back of a cue for an all you can eat buffet. Let us be your medically obese, adolescent male, adorned in button up stripy shirt and stretchy sweatpants as we prepare to load our plate with a heap of steaming retro movie magic. We’ll pile on gallons of cinematic awesomeness before we wedge ourselves ever so uncomfortably into our seat and devour the celluloid wonder….Burp!!

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 28th JUNE

The ‘Burbs (1989) ITV4 12:25pm-2:25pm (2 hours)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover  the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and  Henry Gibson.

Fun Fact: Early in the movie, when Cory Danziger is eating breakfast, a box of Gremlins cereal can be seen on the kitchen counter in the background. Director Joe Dante also directed Gremlins (1984) and Corey Feldman was in Gremlins (1984).

Independence Day (1996) Film4 1:00pm-3:45pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
A fleet of huge flying saucers launches a devastating and unprovoked attack on Earth. As survivors try to flee the seemingly unstoppable alien invaders, the courageous US president, an ace pilot and a computer genius come up with a plan to take the fight to the enemy and  save the human race. Roland Emmerich’s sci-fi adventure, starring Will Smith, Bill Pullman, Jeff Goldblum, Mary McDonnell, Randy Quaid,  Robert Loggia and Harry Connick Jr.

Transformers (2007) Channel 4 7:15pm-10:00pm (2 hours 45 minutes)
Teenager Sam Witwicky is treated to his first car by his dad, but it turns out to be an alien scout with a life of its own. Before long, the vehicle embroils Sam in a long-running intergalactic war between two factions of giant shape-changing robots, which have come to Earth to find a mystical cube that grants infinite power to its possessor. Michael Bay’s sci-fi action adventure, inspired by the toy franchise, with Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Jon Voight and John Turturro.

Transformers T-Shirt

Terminal Velocity (1994) Channel 4 12:35am-2:15am (1 hour 40 minutes)
A skydiving instructor tries to clear himself of responsibility for the death of a woman whose parachute failed to open. However, he later learns she is a Russian spy who faked her own demise, and now needs his help to foil an international criminal conspiracy out to steal a fortune in bullion. Action thriller, starring Charlie Sheen, Nastassja Kinski and James Gandolfini

SUNDAY 29th JUNE

Stargate (1994) 5* 2:40pm-5:00pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
An Egyptologist and a soldier head an expedition through a mysterious portal to an alien planet. The world they find resembles ancient Egypt and is under the rule of a tyrant who has convinced the downtrodden inhabitants that he is a god – until the humans incite the  enslaved populace to fight back. Sci-fi adventure, starring Kurt Russell, James Spader and Jaye Davidson.

Addams Family Values (1993) E4 8:00pm-9:50pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Spooky couple Gomez and Morticia hire a nanny to look after their new baby son – and stop him suffering an early death at the hands of his  jealous elder siblings. Romance soon blossoms between the new childminder and Uncle Fester, but he does not realise she is planning to kill him once she has got hold of the family fortune. Comedy sequel, starring Anjelica Huston, Raul Julia, Christopher Lloyd, Christina Ricci and Joan Cusack.

Mars Attacks! (1996) ITV4 9:00pm-11:10pm (2 hours 10 minutes)
The inhabitants of Earth leap into action to repel an impending invasion by a seemingly invincible Martian army, which possesses superior  weaponry, a thirst for destruction and a wicked sense of humour. Tim Burton’s sci-fi comedy, starring Jack Nicholson, Glenn Close, Pierce Brosnan, Annette Bening, Natalie Portman, Danny DeVito and Tom Jones.

And Now for Something Completely Different (1971) BBC1 London 12:05am-1:30am (1 hour 25 minutes)
The Monty Python members appear in their first movie, comprising re-enacted sketches from the first two series of the surreal comedy show. Highlights include the dead parrot sketch, the Lumberjack Song and the Upper-class Twit of the Year Race. Starring the usual team of John Cleese, Michael Palin, Graham Chapman, Eric Idle, Terry Jones and Terry Gilliam, with regular female sidekick Carol Cleveland.

Ministry Of Silly Walks Monty Python T-Shirt Monty Python T-Shirt

Whatever you get up to this Weekend remember to do your stretches and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 90

Sweet potato and gravy! It’s the weekend again retro film fans!

Like a hunter slowly creeping their way through the woods, lightly treading on the leaves and sticks as they stalk their prey, let us be your jumping, antlered stag as we dash and dive our way through this weekends retro cinematic greatness and make our way back to the safe land of celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 15th MARCH

The ‘Burbs (1989) ITV4 1:50-3:45 (1 hour 55 minutes)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and Henry Gibson.

The 'Burbs

Electric Dreams (1984) MGM Channel 3:50-5:25 (1 hour 35 minutes)
A man falls hopelessly in love with his neighbour, only to discover his rival for her affections is none other than his super-computer – and the ensuing feud soon leaves him in peril. Sci-fi comedy, starring Lenny von Dohlen, Maxwell Caulfield and Virginia Madsen.

Aliens (1986) E4 9:00-12:10 (3 hours 10 minutes)
Lone survivor Ripley is rescued in deep space decades after an alien creature wiped out her ship’s entire crew. She is recruited to accompany a military expedition to a colony on the planet where she first encountered the monster, only to find the aliens have been reproducing and there are now hordes of them. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller sequel, with Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn and Lance Henriksen.

Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985) Syfy 9:00-11:00 (2 hours)
John Rambo returns to the jungles of Vietnam on a life-or-death mission to rescue American PoWs. In the course of the operation, he develops strong feelings for his guide, a female freedom fighter – but tragedy strikes, leaving him more determined than ever to exact a bloody and explosive revenge. Action adventure sequel, with Sylvester Stallone, Richard Crenna, Julia Nickson-Soul and Steven Berkoff.

Rambo T-Shirt
Men's First Blood Rambo T-Shirt

Rambo T-Shirt
Men's Charcoal Rambo T-Shirt

SUNDAY 16th MARCH

Back to the Future (1985) Sky Movies Action & Adventure 12:35-2:35 (2 hours)
Teenager Marty McFly travels back to the 1950s in a time machine built by his eccentric inventor friend. The return journey proves tricky enough, but he also accidentally alters the sequence of events that led to his parents falling in love – and has to persuade his future dad to win his mother’s heart, or he will never be born. Sci-fi comedy adventure, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson and Crispin Glover.

Back to the Future T-Shirt
Back to the Future Rolled Sleeve Boyfriend T-Shirt

Back to the Future T-Shirt
Men's Back to the Future Movie Poster T-Shirt

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) ITV London 4:15-6:35 (2 hours 20 minutes)
James Bond’s investigation into the death of a world-renowned scientist working on solar technology draws him into a battle of wits with a stealthy assassin, who dispatches his victims with a golden bullet and has the British secret agent next in his sights. Spy adventure, starring Roger Moore, Christopher Lee, Britt Ekland and Maud Adams.

A Bug’s Life (1998) Sky Movies Disney 6:15-8:00 (1 hour 45 minutes)
Well-meaning ant Flik lands his colony in trouble when he accidentally disposes of an offering meant for a swarm of greedy grasshoppers – who promptly promise a horrible revenge. Faced with the imminent destruction of the anthill, he sets out to save the situation by enlisting the help of a few would-be heroes – an out-of-work troupe of bugs from a low-rent flea circus. Pixar animation, with the voices of Dave Foley, Kevin Spacey and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

A Bug's Life

Alice in Wonderland (2010) BBC3 7:20-9:00 (1 hour 40 minutes)
A 19-year-old Alice returns to the magical land, having forgotten her previous adventures. She finds the tyrannical Red Queen has begun a reign of terror that can only be ended by slaying the monstrous Jabberwocky – a task she is seemingly destined to perform. Tim Burton’s fantasy adventure based on Lewis Carroll’s novels, starring Mia Wasikowska, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter and Anne Hathaway.

Alice In Wonderland T-Shirt
Ladies Alice In Wonderland White Rabbit T-Shirt

Alice In Wonderland T-Shirt
We're All Mad Here Alice In Wonderland T-Shirt

Whatever you’re up to this weekend, remember to keep secrets a secret and always check under the bed for monsters.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 73!

Curse of a gypsy Queen! It has to be the weekend!

So like a traditionally crafted wooden marionette delicately dangling inside a handmade cardboard stage decorated by crayon, glitter and glue let us be your master manipulator as we attempt to pull the correct strings for mega movie greatness, we’ll attempt to make you dance for cinematic awesomeness before bowing down to celluloid glory.

Have a happy retro weekend!

SATURDAY 26th October

Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (2002) ITV London 3:00pm-5:40pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi and apprentice Anakin Skywalker are sent to protect Senator Padme Amidala from an assassin. However, as galactic civil war threatens to erupt, the pair are forced to split their efforts, leading Anakin into an ill-advised romance and the beginnings of a journey toward the dark side. George Lucas’s second prequel to the original sci-fi trilogy, starring Ewan McGregor, Hayden Christensen, Natalie Portman and Christopher Lee

Mens Grey Marl Star Wars Rollercoaster TShirt
Mens Grey Marl Star Wars Rollercoaster TShirt

Men's Black Darth Vader Barbers Shop Star Wars T-Shirt
Men's Black Darth Vader Barbers Shop Star Wars T-Shirt

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (1989) Sky1 9:00pm-10:55pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
An American householder is dismayed when his plans for a traditional festive family holiday are thrown into complete disarray by a succession of annoying neighbours and long-lost relatives, who turn up on his doorstep offering their own brand of Christmas cheer. Comedy, starring Chevy Chase, Beverly D’Angelo, Randy Quaid, Diane Ladd, Juliette Lewis, Miriam Flynn, Johnny Galecki and William Hickey

Die Hard 2 (1990) Channel 4 9:00pm-11:20pm (2 hours 20 minutes)
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton

Beverly Hills Cop II (1987) Channel 4 11:20pm-1:20am (2 hours)
Wisecracking Detroit detective Axel Foley returns to Los Angeles to investigate a spate of violent robberies, but gets more than he bargained for when he finds himself up against an arms dealer who uses a glamorous hit-woman to do his dirty work. Comedy thriller sequel, with Eddie Murphy, Judge Reinhold, John Ashton, Ronny Cox and Brigitte Nielsen

SUNDAY 27th October

Casper (1995) ITV2 4:25pm-6:25pm (2 hours)
A paranormal expert moves into a haunted house where his daughter befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy – but things start to go awry when three smelly spooks and two dastardly crooks try to chase the new residents away. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci, Bill Pullman, Eric Idle, Cathy Moriarty and featuring the voice of Malachi Pearson.

The NeverEnding Story (1984) Watch 5:10pm-7:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
A lonely boy, neglected by his father and bullied at school, finds comfort in a mysterious book about a young hero’s quest to save his world from destruction. However, as he reads the tale, he begins to become part of the story. Fantasy adventure based on Michael Edne’s novel, starring Barret Oliver, Noah Hathaway, Gerald McRaney, Moses Gunn and Patricia Hayes

The ‘Burbs (1989) ITV4 6:00pm-8:00pm (2 hours)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and Henry Gibson.

Ghostbusters (1984) Channel 5 6:55pm-8:55pm (2 hours)
Three eccentric scientists put their hi-tech gadgetry and knowledge of the paranormal to money-making use by setting up in business as freelance ghost catchers. A musician calls them in to investigate when she sees strange creatures in her kitchen, only to end up possessed. As the spook-hunting team members deal with an attempt to shut their operation down, they discover an evil demonic entity is being summoned into existence and it falls to them to stop this creature from destroying the world. Supernatural comedy adventure, starring Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Sigourney Weaver, Ernie Hudson and Rick Moranis.

Ladies Grey Marl Ghostbusters Logo Vest
Ladies Grey Marl Ghostbusters Logo Vest

Men's Dark Grey Marble Wash Who Ya Gonna Call Ghostbusters T-Shirt
Men's Dark Grey Who Ya Gonna Call Ghostbusters T-Shirt

Whip Crackalaka! Bonus movie clip time this week a little something from Axel Foley

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Whatever you get up to this weekend, remember to never go swimming straight after eating and always enjoy yourselves.
xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 58!

Bananas in pyjamas! It’s Weekend time again folks!

So in a dense green forest high on an old oak tree let us be your busy fuzzy squirrel as we try to forage for retro movie greatness, sniff around for classic cinematic awesomeness and the jump tree to tree sniffing for celluloid wonder. Have a happy retro weekend.

SATURDAY 22nd June

The Burbs (1989) ITV London 3:55pm-5:45pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and Henry Gibson

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Superman III (1983) 5USA 6:25pm-9:00pm (2 hours 35 minutes)
The Man of Steel battles an evil tycoon, who has recruited a computer genius to aid his schemes for world domination. Together the villains hatch a plan to dispose of Superman once and for all – but instead of killing the superhero, they accidentally turn him evil. Comic-book adventure sequel, starring Christopher Reeve, Richard Pryor, Robert Vaughn and Margot Kidder

Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach (1988) ITV4 8:10pm-10:00pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
The clumsy cops visit Miami for a police chiefs’ convention to see Commandant Lassard receive an award for his retirement. Any hopes of a sun-kissed vacation are thwarted when a luggage mix-up lands them in the middle of a huge illegal arms deal. Comedy sequel, starring Bubba Smith, Michael Winslow, George Gaynes, Matt McCoy and Leslie Easterbrook.

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) ITV London 10:55pm-1:25am (2 hours 30 minutes)
A reprogrammed killing machine is sent back in time to the 20th century to protect John Connor, a teenage boy whose destiny is to save the human race. After breaking John’s mother out of a mental institution, the pair set out to avert a future nuclear war – pursued by an advanced prototype terminator with shape-changing powers. Sci-fi action adventure sequel, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Edward Furlong and Robert Patrick

SUNDAY 23rd June

Turner & Hooch (1989) Film4 4:45pm-6:40pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A Californian detective investigating the murder of a local man by drug smugglers has only one witness to help him solve the case – the large smelly dog that belonged to the victim, and which is about to turn the detective’s well-ordered existence into chaos. Family comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Mare Winningham and Craig T Nelson

Sleepless in Seattle (1993) Channel 5 6:05pm-8:00pm (1 hour 55 minutes)
A widowed father is coping badly with his wife’s death, but his son is convinced that what he really needs is some new romance in his life. He arranges for his dad to go on a radio phone-in show, and his touching story moves a reporter to respond, even though she is already engaged. She returns to her fiance, but the boy, certain she is the woman for his father, plots to bring them together. Romantic comedy, with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan

Hot Shots! (1991) E4 8:30pm-10:15pm (1 hour 45 minutes)
A pilot joins an elite squad to take part in a dangerous mission, but faces a struggle to live down his father’s bad reputation – and win the love of a glamorous psychiatrist. Comedy spoofing action movies – principally Top Gun – starring Charlie Sheen, Lloyd Bridges, Valeria Golino, Cary Elwes, Kevin Dunn and William O’Leary

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Die Hard 2 (1990) Film4 9:00pm-11:25pm (2 hours 25 minutes)
Tough cop John McClane arrives at an airport to pick up his wife but finds himself plunged into a bloody life-or-death struggle. He must battle terrorists who have seized control of the terminal as part of a campaign to secure the release of a convicted drug baron. Action thriller sequel, starring Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Sadler, Franco Nero and William Atherton

Whatever you get up to this weekend ALWAYS remember who ever smelt it dealt it and always enjoy yourselves.

xoxo

The Weekly Retro Movie Rundown 43

Cor Blimey O’Rielly it’s only the weekend again!

As if travelling through deep dark space light-years beyond our galaxy let us be your intrepid interstellar explorer aboard a gigantic shining space craft as we search the stars for interplanetary movie greatness, intellectual alien retro cinematic awesomeness and penetrate the unknown depths for intergalactic celluloid wonder.

Have a happy retro weekend 🙂

SATURDAY 9th MARCH

Stand By Me (1986)5* 4:30pm-6:20pm (1 hour 50 minutes)
Four 12-year-old best friends embark on a life-changing adventure in the Oregon wilderness in search of a missing teenager’s body, unaware of the trials and triumphs that await them. Rob Reiner’s 1950s-set coming-of-age drama, based on a novella by Stephen King, starring River Phoenix, Wil Wheaton, Jerry O’Connell, Corey Feldman, Kiefer Sutherland and Richard Dreyfuss.

Godzilla (1998)5* 6:20pm-9:00pm (2 hours 40 minutes)
A giant mutant lizard spawned from an atomic test rampages through the streets of New York, defying the combined might of the US Army and Navy as it searches for a quiet place to hatch its eggs. A bookish radiation expert and a shady French secret agent join forces to defeat the creature. Hollywood remake of the Japanese monster adventure, starring Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo and Hank Azaria.

Turner & Hooch (1989)Film4 7:00pm-9:00pm (2 hours)
A Californian detective investigating the murder of a local man by drug smugglers has only one witness to help him solve the case – the large smelly dog that belonged to the victim, and which is about to turn the detective’s well-ordered existence into chaos. Family comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Mare Winningham and Craig T Nelson.

Enter the Dragon (1973)ITV4 11:00pm-1:05am (2 hours 5 minutes)
A powerful crime kingpin hosts a martial arts tournament on his island lair. A former Shaolin monk is recruited by an intelligence agency to enter the tournament and expose the crime lord’s opium and slavery rings. He finds himself fighting for his life alongside two Vietnam veterans who are both fleeing their own enemies. Thriller, starring Bruce Lee, John Saxon, Jim Kelly and Kien Shih.

SUNDAY 10th MARCH

The Mighty Ducks (1992)ITV2 3:25pm-5:30pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
A self-centred yuppie lawyer is horrified when a judge finds him guilty of drink-driving and orders him to coach a hopeless inner-city junior ice-hockey team as part of his community service. However, he comes to appreciate his new role and things finally start to look up for the team. Comedy, starring Emilio Estevez, Joss Ackland, Lane Smith and Joshua Jackson.

The ‘Burbs (1989)ITV4 5:00pm-7:00pm (2 hours)
The arrival of secretive neighbours sparks an unhealthy curiosity in a group of friends, leading them to go to bizarre lengths to discover the truth about the newcomers. However, their investigations take an even weirder twist when they begin to suspect their unseen fellow suburbanites are part of a cannibalistic cult. Joe Dante’s black comedy, starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Carrie Fisher, Corey Feldman and Henry Gibson.

Rocky II (1979)Channel 5 6:45pm-9:00pm (2 hours 15 minutes)
Philadelphia boxer Rocky Balboa quits the ring to marry his sweetheart and become a father. However, times prove hard and money is tight, so when Balboa is offered another shot at Apollo Creed’s heavyweight title, the fighter is lured out of retirement. Drama sequel, starring Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers, Burt Young and Burgess Meredith.

Men's Rocky Balboa vs Clubber Lang T-Shirt £19.99 (also available for ladies)
Men's Rocky Balboa vs Clubber Lang T-Shirt £19.99 (also available for ladies)

Ghostbusters II (1989)Comedy Central 8:00pm-10:05pm (2 hours 5 minutes)
The eccentric spectre-hunters reunite to save New York from a massive river of slime generated by the citizens’ negativity and nasty thoughts. Meanwhile, the spirit of a 16th-century tyrant tries to return to the land of the living by possessing the body of a toddler. Sequel to the supernatural comedy, starring Bill Murray, Sigourney Weaver, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Rick Moranis and Ernie Hudson.

Ladies Ghostbusters Supernatural Spectacular T-Shirt £19.99 (also available for men)
Ladies Ghostbusters Supernatural Spectacular T-Shirt £19.99 (also available for men)

Cockadoodle doo! Bonus movie clip time:

To this day I’m still confused to whether Goofy is a dog or not?!

Whatever you get up to this weekend, remember to enjoy yourselves and please play nice.

xoxo